Episode Guide

Episode #206
Written by Neena Beber
(Transcript created by Richard Lobinske)

(opening theme song)

(at the Morgendorffer house)

(a home video is playing on the TV screen: Daria as a young child and Quinn as a toddler are seated at a table wearing party hats, each seated on on either side of a birthday cake with three candles; when Daria goes to blow out the candles, Quinn blows them out first)

Young Daria - Hey! You're ruining my birthday cake!

(in the living room, Daria and Quinn are seated on one sofa, Jake on another, watching the video)

Daria - If only that were all she ruined.

(on the video, a long-haired Helen enters the frame)

Young Daria - Make her stop!

Young Helen - Oh, Daria, she's just a baby. She wants to play, too!

(in the living room)

Quinn - I'm such a cute baby.

Young Daria (VO) - Why can't I be an only child?

Daria - Yeah. Why can't I?

(on the video, Quinn starts to dance and Daria reaches out to stop the recording)

(in the living room)

Jake - Isn't it great to sit here and see your whole life unfold before your eyes?

Daria - It's almost as good as drowning.

Jake - Girls, guess what? I found a box of old home movies my dad took of me when I was a kid! I'm having them transferred to video tape!

Quinn - I wonder why I never went through an awkward phase?

(outside the Playhouse 99 movie theater)

(Daria and Jane are waiting in line)

Jane - He wanted you to watch her birth? That could scar you for life.

Daria - The birth itself did that.

Jane - Speaking of permanent damage...

(Kevin and Brittany enter; Kevin is carrying a grocery bag of produce)

Kevin - I don't see any vegetables!

Daria - You should have my view.

Jane - Why vegetables?

Brittany - To throw at the screen during the big food fight?

Daria - What food fight?

Kevin - Daria, are you thick or something? This is the Food in Film Festival.

Brittany - Didn't you see the Rocky Horror Picture Show last month? Kevin and I wore each other's underwear.

Jane - Again?

Daria - Sorry to disappoint you, but I don't think this is an interactive event. Tonight they're showing Andre Sakarynsky's Last Meal.

Jane - A Russian art film from the 1930s.

Kevin - Russian?

Brittany and Kevin - Subtitles!

(Kevin pushes the bag into Daria's arms and he runs away with Brittany)

(later, outside Playhouse 99; it is night, and heavy, dark clouds are overhead as Daria and Jane exit)

Jane - I'm hungry. You didn't happen to save any of Kevin's produce, did you?

Mr. O'Neill (VO) - Daria?

(Mr. O'Neill exits theater and walks up to Daria and Jane)

Daria - Uh, oh. We're about to be seen with a teacher. Hi, Mr. O'Neill.

Mr. O'Neill - Hi, girls! I'm just so invigorated! Great cinema is timeless. Couldn't that movie have been made today?

Daria - I guess, if you could find someone to exhume the actors.

Mr. O'Neill - Can I give you two a lift home?

Daria - No, that's okay. We love to walk.

Jane - Yeah, it's a perfect night for a nice long stroll.

(right on cue, lightning flashes and it starts to rain)

(cut to Mr. O'Neill's car; Jane and Daria, both dripping wet, get into the back while O'Neill holds the door)

Mr. O'Neill - Don't you want to sit in the front, Daria?

Daria - You know, I'd love to, but, you know, I'm afraid of an airbag injury.

Mr. O'Neill - Oh, my gosh, I'm so sorry, what was I thinking? Of course you must sit in the back!

(Mr. O'Neill driving car with Daria and Jane in back seat)

Mr. O'Neill - Sometimes I think film is even more a mirror of the times than the novel. Do you think this is because of its greater verisimilitude? Jane?

Jane - I can't really hear you back here. Road noise. Plus, I don't know what verisimilitude means.

Mr. O'Neill - What about you, Daria?

Daria - Let's face it. Most people would rather watch a movie than read a book. It's fast, it's easy, and you don't have to worry about your lips moving.

Mr. O'Neill - That is a fabulous class assignment, Daria! Thank you for the suggestion!

Daria - Um, did I make a suggestion? Because if so, I'd like to withdraw it.

(at Lawndale High, in Mr. O'Neill's class)

Mr. O'Neill - So, as an exercise in living literature, you'll all be making your own movies. We have Daria to thank for that exciting suggestion.

Daria - There's that word again.

Mr. O'Neill - Now, before we split into movie making teams, who would like to direct?

(entire class except Daria and Jane raises their hands and shouts "me!")

(at the Morgendorffer house)

(Jake is seated at the kitchen table with a camcorder in front of him; Daria is seated next to him)

Jake - Remember, this is a precious, precise, and very, very costly instrument. It's not the sort of thing one ordinarily lends a teenager.

Daria - We'll be careful.

Jake - I explained to you about the three focus modes and the depth of field override and the auto-sleep feature.

Daria - I'm about to go into auto-sleep myself.

Jake - Okay, Daria. Just... try not to use it too much. (hands camcorder to Daria)

(outside the Lane house, viewed through camcorder with the record light flashing; Jane's face fills most of the frame; when she moves away, the camera is facing down on a sidewalk with Daria looking up at it)

Jane - There. Tree-Cam.

Daria - You're just going to leave it running?

(cut to wide view; we see that the camera is placed in a tree at the corner of the driveway and sidewalk)

Jane - Only a day or two. It'll catch everyone passing by through the tree's totally objective point of view.

(long pause as Daria and Jane watch the camera)

Daria - Riveting.

Jane - Andy Warhol filmed eight hours of a guy sleeping and people thought it was brilliant.

Daria - Those people changed their minds after they got into twelve step programs.

Jane - Wait... I think I just saw some leaves rustle.

Daria - There's our climax.

Jane - Maybe we need a script.

(at the Morgendorffer house)

(Daria is seated on her bed, reading from a script; the camera is on a tripod pointed at Jane)

Daria - And then you open the window and say, "Life is a meaningless descent into the void." Then you jump, and on the way down you scream, "Now I understand, I understand everything."

Jane - Can you get rid of the window part and give me something funny to say? And a poodle. I'd really like to be in a scene where I'm walking a poodle.

Daria - Actors.

(at the Lane house)

(view through camcorder, with record light flashing, of hand-held clay puppets among household items)

Daria (squeaky VO) - "Is there no way out?"

Jane (squeaky VO) - "No exit, my friend. It's just us, stuck in this room forever and ever."

(cut to view of Jane's room; Daria and Jane are seated on the floor holding clay puppets within a miniature set and taping)

Daria (squeaky voice) - "Help! Hell is other people."

(Trent walks by and chuckles)

Daria - On second thought, hell is myself.

(in a park near a fountain)

(Kevin moves in imitation slow-motion toward Brittany, who is wearing a pink formal dress; Jodie and Mack are taping; Kevin tries to lift Brittany in slow motion and fails)

Brittany - No, babe, you gotta run to me like you haven't seen me in years. I've been in China, remember?

Kevin - I was trying to do it in slow motion, like Jodie said.

Brittany - You add the slow motion part after, you idiot. (to Jodie) Don't you?

Jodie - Who cares. This sucks. I really want to do a film about the supermarket strike.

Brittany - But I already paid for this gown. I can't play a checkout girl in this.

Mack - It's a documentary. You don't need the gown.

Brittany - Oh, no! I won't do a nude scene! Unless you think it's crucial to my character.

(at the Morgendorffer house)

(Quinn is rummaging through Daria's closet when Daria and Jane walk up)

Daria - What are you doing?

Quinn - Can I borrow something to wear to the Fashion Club party tonight?

Jane - Check her head for bumps.

Quinn - Please, Daria? It's the Fashion Don'ts Costume Gala.

Jane - You know, a Fashion Don'ts Costume Gala could be kind of... cinematic. (holds camcorder up)

Daria - Hmmm. Yeah. I'll tell you what. I'll lend you an outfit, but you have to let me videotape your friends tonight.

Quinn - What, like, with a camera?

Daria - Yes. For a movie, for class.

Quinn - Why would I say no to that? (leaves with a set of Daria's green jackets and black skirts)

(in the living room, Daria and Jane are seated on a sofa watching video of the Fashion Don'ts party they taped the night before)

Jane - She's strangely mesmerizing.

Daria - Superficial... narcissistic... self-absorbed... she's got star quality, all right.

(TV screen showing party; Quinn is dressed as Daria and talking to Sandi, Stacy, and Tiffany, each of whom are dressed in dreadful outfits)

Quinn (on TV) - I love your don'ts, Sandi.

Sandi (on TV) - But look at you, Quinn: boxy top with too long bottom and the wrong shoes. Where did you ever come up with that?

Tiffany (on TV) - Quinn, you're a genius.

Quinn (on TV) - I'm, like, an artist, and this is how I express myself!

Stacy and Tiffany (on TV) - Oh! Bad color!

Jane - She's even scarier on tape.

Daria - This party is just the tip of the iceberg. We've found our subject.

Jane - You mean...

Daria - A day in the life of Quinn Morgendorffer.

Jane - Are you sure you want to do a horror movie?

(on the tape, Quinn is pulling her hand through her long red hair, showing off for the camera)

(at the Morgendorffer house)

(Quinn, Helen and Daria are sitting around the kitchen table, upon which sits the remnants of a chicken-in-a-bucket meal)

Quinn - So they're going to follow me around for a whole day.

Daria - Or a minute, depending on how much we can stand.

(Helen starts cleaning up, putting smaller containers into the larger bucket)

Helen - It's so nice to get home early and have a chance to make dinner. Quinn, are you sure you want to do this? What about your privacy?

Quinn - When did this family turn into such a bunch of privacy freaks?

(Jake enters, holding a stack of videotapes)

Jake - My video transfers! I can't wait to relive my childhood!

Helen - Shall we watch after dinner?

Jake - I thought I'd write a little narration before the big screening. I want to capture the whole essence of the period.

Helen - I don't remember you having such fond memories of those days.

Jake - It's all coming back to me! It really makes you feel nostalgic for your childhood. This is your golden time! Enjoy your youth, girls.

Quinn - I think I'll pass on dessert. I don't want to look puffy tomorrow. (leaves)

Daria - I guess I'll go watch TV by myself for awhile. (leaves)

(in Daria's room)

(Daria is sitting on the bed watching television; the TV screen shows intoxicated ballerinas)

SSW Announcer - When these ballerinas work out at the bar, they work out at the bar! Tanked in a tutu when Sick, Sad World returns.

(knocking at door)

Daria - Come in.

(Helen enters)

Helen - Daria, I wonder if you'd tell me what you have in mind for this movie of Quinn.

Daria - What do you mean? It's just a lame assignment for English class.

Helen - I mean, why Quinn?

Daria - Well, she's lively, she's photogenic. You know what? She's bubbly.

Helen - Daria...

Daria - We're going to follow around Quinn for a day and show the world what it's like to be attractive and popular. I'm kind of curious about that myself.

Helen - It's just that sometimes you judge people's behavior by a pretty rigid set of standards. Not everyone can live up to them.

Daria - That's what wrong with the world.

Helen - Not even you live up to them all the time.


Daria - I guess I could go easy on her.

Helen - Thanks, sweetie. (leaves and closes door)

Daria - But don't hold your breath.

(in the living room; the doorbell rings and Daria opens it for Jane)

Jane - Ready?

Daria - Rarin'.

(Quinn, in a rumpled nightshirt and tangled hair, peeks out of her bedroom door to see Daria and Jane, with camera, approaching)

Daria (VO) - Remember, we're exposing a hollow, self-centered egomaniac.

(Quinn gasps and quickly closes the door)

Daria - Trust me. We won't have to work very hard. Let's just say mornings are not her best time.

(Daria and Jane burst into Quinn's room, camera rolling; through the lens, we see that Quinn now looks almost angelic, perfectly made up and in a fashionable nightgown; she gets out of bed and walks to the window to open the curtain)

Quinn - Good morning, beautiful world.

Daria - Aww.

Quinn - Don't you want to shoot me?

Daria - Yes. I want to shoot you.

Quinn - By the way, which is my best side? I know they're both good.

(Quinn at mirror while Jane films)

Daria - You're already wearing makeup.

Quinn - I am not! I just happen to be the kind of person who doesn't really need makeup.

Daria - So you're putting it on because...

Quinn - Not everyone is as lucky as I am. I want to be a role model for all people. Even the ones who need makeup really badly.

Daria - I think I need to sit down. I'm getting dizzy.

(outside the Food Lord supermarket)

(employees on strike are being filmed in their picket line by Jodie, Mack, Kevin, and Brittany)

Strikers (chanting) - The people, united, will never be divided!

Brittany - I don't get it! Why are they all standing there?

Mack - They're having a dispute with management, so they refuse to work.

Brittany - Someone should tell them they're taking up the sidewalk.

(Mack, holding microphone, approaches one of the strikers)

Mack - Tell me why you're on strike and what you hope to accomplish.

Man #1 - It's simple enough: an honest day's pay for an honest day's work, and stop chiseling away at our benefits!

Brittany - I'm getting a craving, babe.

Kevin - Ho-Hos?

Brittany - Yeah!

Kevin - No problem, babe!

(as Kevin tries to go into the store, he is stopped and surrounded by angry strikers)

Kevin - Hey! Wait a...

(a scuffle ensues, with Kevin square in the middle)

(at an unidentified fitness center)

(Quinn, Sandi, Stacy, and Tiffany are each seated on mats in the lotus position; Daria and Jane are taping)

Quinn - Power yoga is a really good thing to do because inner beauty is just as important as outer beauty. Like, can you have a CD without a CD player? I don't think so!

(at the Morgendorffer house)

(Jake is seated on a sofa in the living room, watching his old home movies and narrating into a tape recorder)

Jake - It was a time of innocence, when you left your doors unlocked and candy bars cost a nickel. Not that those two facts are related, I'm... aww, dammit! Lemme start over here.

(on the TV screen, a small boy is riding a bicycle in front of a young woman; the boy falls off the bike and starts to cry; the woman waves and walks away; the boy wipes his eyes and gets on the bike, riding away)

Jake - It was a carefree time when a young boy could learn to ride a bike on sun-dappled streets. Hey! Hey! Why doesn't anybody help that poor kid? He skinned his knee! Oh, I get it. "Get back on the bike Jake. Big boys don't cry. Crying is for girls, Jakey." Shake, shake, quiver and quake! It's all coming back to me now!

(at the pizza place)

(outside, Daria and Jane are following the Fashion Club and taping)

Sandi - Are your cousin and her friend going to follow us everywhere we go?

(they enter and sit down at a booth where a young man is already seated; Daria and Jane sit at a nearby table to continue taping)

Quinn - I told you, just ignore them.

Tiffany - You always say that about them, but they don't usually have a camera.

Quinn - It's a little project that I got, um, forced into. By the way, which do you think is my best side?

Zachary - They're both good.

Quinn - I know, but this side has my better dimples.

Daria - I don't know how much more of this I can take.

Quinn - Um, guy? Would you find out if they have those cheeseless pizzas?

Zachary - Sure! And, uh, it's Zachary. (gets up)

Sandi - Why did you invite that guy?

Tiffany - I thought you were going steady with Larry this week.

Quinn - Larry totaled his car. Zachary's got his mom's car.

(Daria and Jane have fallen asleep with the camcorder left on the table)

Stacy - You're so smart, Quinn. You always think ahead.

Quinn - Did you hear that? Did you hear that, guys? (snaps fingers) Guys!

(Daria and Jane wake up)

(at the Morgendorffer house)

(the lights are off in the living room; Helen walks in to see Jake, drinking a martini, endlessly repeating the scene of him falling from the bike)

Helen - Oh, look at that cute little boy. And he grew up into such a handsome man.

(bike fall repeated on TV screen)

Helen - Honey? Wouldn't you like a little more light in here? (no response) Okay, Jake, I'm just going to catch up on some paperwork in the kitchen.

(she leaves the room, leaving Jake to his childhood traumas)

(at the mall)

(the Fashion Club, with Zachary in tow, walk through a department store, presumably Cashman's; Daria and Jane are taping)

Quinn - Thanks for driving us here, Aaron.

Zachary - It's Zachary.

Quinn - That's what I said. But shopping is kind of a girl thing. Maybe you could meet us after or something.

Zachary - But what will I do in the meantime?

Quinn - I don't know. Do you have any shopping to do? Maybe there's someone special you want to get a present for.

Zachary - Um, well, you're kind of special, Quinn.

Quinn - Oh, Zachary, you don't have to get me a present. If you ask for Theresa in Junior 5 and tell her it's for Quinn, she'll help you out.

Daria (to Jane) - Did you get that? I hope you got that.

(she didn't, as she's too busy taping the objects in a cosmetics display case)

Jane - Did you know that "pore refiner" spelt backwards is "renifer erop"?

Daria - Give me that! (grabs camera)

(camcorder view of Quinn and Tiffany at cosmetics counter)

Quinn - Oh, look! Pore refiner. I'm glad I don't need that. Have you ever noticed how popular people always have the tiniest pores? I wonder why that is?

Tiffany - Your pores are really cute, Quinn.

Quinn - (panics) But you can't seem them, can you?

(Quinn finally notices that Daria is still taping, and does what Daria has been waiting all day for her to do: completely and totally lose her cool)

Quinn - Oh, my God, they've been... they've been zooming! You better not zoom that thing. Stop zooming, I mean it. If you can see any of my pores on camera, I swear, I'll kill you. Stop the tape! I do not have pores! My pores are cute! My pores are tiny! You're fired!

(Quinn pushes her hand into the camera lens; taping stops in a burst of static)

Daria - Anything you say can and will be used against you. (to Jane) We've got our Quinn.

Jane - That's a wrap.

Daria - But a wrap skirt is a definite don't. (puts hand to face) Oh, my God. Did I really just say that?

(dream sequence begins)

(the Fashion Club is walking down a school corridor; the image is distorted, Quinn is replaced by Daria in Quinn's body, and the others, while they speak in their normal voices, all have Jane's head)

Daria/Quinn - I have the cutest little pores, don't I?

Jane/Tiffany - You really do. Each one is like a tiny dimple.

Jane/Stacy - I wish I had pores like yours, Daria

Daria/Quinn - "Pores Like Yours." That would be a great name for a pore conditioning exfoliant.

Jane/Sandi - God, Daria, how do you do it? Here we are, complimenting you on your perfect pores, and you're unselfishly thinking about how you can improve the pores of others.

Daria/Quinn - Duh! I guess when it rains, it "pores."

(all laugh as dream sequence ends)

(cut to Daria's bedroom as she wakes up in shock)

(in the living room, Jake is in his pajamas and holding a coffee cup; he is still watching the same bicycle scene as Daria enters, holding a coffee cup)

Daria - Dad? What are you doing up?

Jake - I was a child. I needed attention. I had a boo-boo on my knee.

Daria - Uh, it's pretty much healed now, though. Right?

Jake - Did anyone care? No one cared. This is what I never had, Daria. What we're doing now: simple parent/child bonding. The kind of closeness your mother and I have worked so hard to give you.

Daria - Gee, that's funny. I could've sworn I woke up from the dream.

Jake - You just can't put a price on a moment like this, Daria, and once these years are gone, they're gone.

Daria - Dad, it's 4:00 A.M. I just woke up from my worst nightmare: resembling my sister. You're reliving an instance of parental neglect from forty years ago. You call this parent/child bonding?

Jake - Works for me.

Daria - Let's watch again.

(at Do Me a Donut)

(Daria and Jane are seated at a booth with coffee and donuts)

Daria - Thanks for meeting me here.

Jane - Looks like you had a rough night.

Daria - Just promise me that if I start acting, talking, or thinking like Quinn, you'll do the right thing.

Jane - If you don't respond to drug therapy, I'll authorize electric shock. Oh, and by the way, your teensy-weensy pores look really cute today.

Daria - But which is my best side, hmm? I know they're both good.

(she glances over at the checkout counter to find Trent standing there)

Trent - Hey, Daria.

Jane - Did I forget to mention who drove me here?

(at the Morgendorffer house)

(Daria and Jane, seated in the living room, are watching their footage of Quinn on the TV; Jane has command of the remote)

Quinn (on tape) - If you can see any of my pores on camera, I swear, I'll kill you. Stop the tape!

Jane - This is too easy.

Daria - Shooting ducks in a barrel.

(Helen enters; Jane stops the tape)

Helen - How's that film project coming?

Daria - Pretty good.

Helen - I haven't seen you so amused since your sister fell at her dance recital. (brief laugh)

Daria - That was me.

Helen - Oh. Well, I knew it was one of you girls laughing at one of you girls. Can I sneak a peek?

Daria - We're still editing.

Jane - Quinn's got a real screen presence.

(Jane starts the tape)

Quinn (on tape) - (in her bedroom) By the way, which is my best side? I know they're both good. (shifts to her pores rant) If you can see any of my pores on camera, I swear, I'll kill you. Stop the tape! I do not have pores! My pores are cute! My pores are tiny! You're fired!

Helen - Oh, my. This is a little cruel. Are you sure you haven't taken her out of context?

Daria - She creates her own context.

Helen - You know, Daria, I wouldn't let Quinn make a movie that made her sister look ridiculous.

Daria - (slightly bitter) How could she? She doesn't admit to having one.

Helen - I'll tell you what, Daria: you do what you think is right. (leaves)

Jane - I don't like the sound of that.

Daria - Don't worry. She's clearly overestimated my conscious... by assuming I have one at all.

Quinn (VO) - By the way, which is my best side?

(Quinn enters; Jane stops the tape)

Quinn - Is that my movie? Can I see?

Daria - Sorry, but that would interfere with the creative process.

Jane - See, we're like artists, and this is how we express ourselves. You understand.

Quinn - I can't wait to see it. I just hope I don't sound stupid or anything. (short laugh) Not that I would.

Daria - Perish the thought.

Quinn - I just, I know that sometimes certain types of people, jealous people, might think, who does she think she is? Because I sometimes think that. But I can't let myself go on too long thinking that.

Daria - Or anything else.

Quinn - I mean, sometimes I'm walking down the hall with Sandi, Stacy, and Tiffany, and suddenly I'm outside of myself, watching, and it's, like, "Who are these girls? Can't they talk about anything besides guys, and clothes, and cars?" But then, what would we talk about? You have to be good at something. You're good at your reading and writing and stuff, and you're good at your little paintings.

Jane - They are miniscule, aren't they?

Quinn - I figure, being attractive and popular, that's what I'm good at. Maybe it's not that important, but, you know, it's what I can do.

(Quinn laughs a short laugh, then exits; without meaning to, she's managed to guilt-trip Daria and Jane like Helen never could)

Daria - Aw, hell.

Jane - Yeah.

(at Lawndale High, in Mr. O'Neill's classroom)

(Mr. O'Neill plays Jodie's movie; on screen, Mack pulls Kevin away from the angry strikers while Brittany jumps on the striker Mack had interviewed; he runs away with her beating on him as the movie cuts to "The End. Though the fight for fair working conditions is never over."; the class applauds)

Mr. O'Neill - Jodie, where did you learn to juggle symbolism like that?

Jodie - Um, I worked with storyboards. I think that helped.

(Quinn cracks open the door to watch)

Mr. O'Neill - And now, a work by Daria and Jane.

(Mr. O'Neill plays Daria and Jane's movie, "The Depths of Shallowness: A True Story")

Quinn (on tape) - I want to be a role model for all people, even the ones that need makeup really badly. (cut) By the way, which is my best side? (cut) Like, can you have a CD without a CD player? I don't think so. (cut) By the way, which is my best side? (cut) Don't look like you have on too much makeup. Wear enough to make it look like you don't have much on. (cut) By the way, which is my best side? (cut) Goodnight. Thanks for sharing my day with me. And remember, fashion is fun and everything, but we should really do something about the rainforest and stuff.

Jane - What was that?

Daria - I told her I'd give her the opportunity to show there was more to her than the surface Quinn. Turns out there isn't.

Jane - And what exactly happened to the pore stuff? Our big finish?

Daria - You know the conscious I don't have? It got to me.

Mr. O'Neill - Wow. The Depths of Shallowness. Now, what if we...

(Quinn falls into the classroom and blushes, but instead of laughing, the students clap and cheer; Quinn takes a bow)

(in the hallway, Jodie walks up to Daria and Jane)

Jodie - Your movie really kicked butt, guys.

Daria - Oh, sure.

Jodie - I mean it! It really captured a kind of despair. Your sister makes me so sad.

Daria - You and me both.

(all three girls watch as Quinn and a large gathering of people walk through the hall)

Guy - You're the girl from the movie! I love you.

Girl #1 - Which is my best side? Can you tell me?

Jodie - (disgusted) Now I'm really sad.

Girl #2 - God, I thought I was the only one ashamed of my pores.

Quinn - We're all ashamed of our pores, but you mustn't be ashamed of your shame.

Jane - So, you did the compassionate thing, and look where it got you.

Daria - She's more popular than ever. We set out to make an exposé, it ends up a love letter.

Jane - See, we're like artists, and this is how we screw ourselves.

Quinn - And you, too, can have bouncy hair if you just take the time to bounce from the inside out. Come on, everyone! Bounce with me!

(closing credits)