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"Self Satisfaction"

(Night Club) Mystic Spiral has just finished a killer set and the room is
cheering at a high pitch. The club owner comes over to Trent.

Owner: Good set Trent, you're really bringing in more and more people. I
love that song "Ice pick chick".

Trent: It's "Ice Box Women".

Owner: Whatever, the point is that people love your group. Here is the
money for tonight's sets and if you can make a double set on Friday I will
pay you double (He hands Trent a bunch of bills).

(Mystic Spiral takes a moment to decide and all give thumbs up to Trent)

Trent: We'll do it.

Owner: Excellent. Here's next weeks money in advance, I know you guys
usually sleep on Friday night because practice runs late or earlywhatever.
(He walks off)

Trent and the group cheer and give high fives with that hand holding grip
thing. He gives Jane one and Daria just watches. He comes to Daria and
raises his hand and Daria looks surprised.

Trent: Give me five Daria.

Daria: Huh?

Trent: Put your hand up.

(Daria puts up her left hand, the same one from "Pierce Me". Trent slaps
it five, holds her hand, and smiles)

(Cut to Daria getting into bed and closing her eyes)

Daria dreams the scene at the nightclub expect that she gives Trent a big
hug for congrats and Trent is about to kiss her when her alarm goes off
waking her up.

Daria: Dammit (She hits "SNOOZE" alarm)!
She leans back in bed and attempts to finish the dream, the way we all do,
but of course can't fall back asleep.

(Cut to Daria and Jane walking in school)

Daira: and then the alarm goes off and I wake up.

Jane: The alarm always goes off when things are either really good ("or
what we want most"-said softer).

Daria: I wish I could be as forward or relaxed as I am in the dreamworld
in the real world.

(Kevin and Brittany come through the halls)

Brittany: Thank you for telling that you don't wear Freudian Slips

Kevin: No problem babes.

Brittany: You're so smart Kevvy, come here.
(They make out on front of Daria's locker, of course.

Daria: One second thought, maybe I do like the way I am. 

(cut to Ms. Li's office)

Ms. Li: What do you mean you have to cut the budget?! We are a public
school dammit, we don't have much money to begin with! (we hear buzzing,
the sound of the other persons voice on the phone) What do you mean "I
have my `ways' of getting the money"? (buzz) Oha fundraiseroh of course
no, no I was just joking. (She puts down the phone and sighs)

Ms Li pushes the intercom button:

Ms. Li: Mrs Bennet, please send Miss Landon and Mr. Mackenzie to my office
immediately. 

(cut to Mrs. Bennet's class. There's a ton of arrows and stuff and
underneath all of it is the word: product)

Jodie: I wonder what's going on

Mack: Now what did Kevin do and get me in trouble for?

Mrs. Bennet: Hmmm, sounds like another fund-raiser. Daria, take over for
me.

Daria: Excuse me?

Mrs. Bennet: Just do what I'd do.

Daria: Okay (she stands up and goes to the front of the class as the three
leave). (In Mrs. Bennet's voice) Now once the products and services, AKA,
goods are purchased by the consumer they go through what is called a
warranty phase (she draws a bunch of arrows).

(the class laughs at Daria's good impression and some clap. We get a rare
Daria smile.)

END SCENE- slow motion of Trent giving Daria five and holding her hand
close
(cut to Ms Li's office)

Ms. Li: Ms. Landon we need to hold a fundraiser as our budget has been cut
once again.

Jodie: What's your idea?

Ms. Li: That's just it, I have run out. All I have is that it must involve
the students.

Jodie: We could hold a "battle of the bands". We could have doorprizes,
have free drinks, prizes for the best band, and a raffle.

Ms. Li: That's a wonderful idea, except for the door prizes, raffle, and
free drinks.

Jodie: Come on Ms. Li, you have to spend money in order to make money.

Ms. Li: Good point Ms. Landon, okay we will have cash prizes for first
through third place.

Mack: Jane's brother is in a band, Mystic Spiral. I could have him get the
word out.

Ms. Li: Jane has a brother?

Jodie: Four other Lanes have attended this school Ms. Li

(cut to the Trent sleeping on his bed with the phone ringing)

Trent reaches out without looking and brings the phone to the pillow

Trent: Hello?

Jane: You Trent! 

Trent: Oh hey Jane. What's up?

Jane: Hope I didn't wake you. Listen, I got you a gig at the high school
this Friday. It's a "battle of the bands" contest. You could win and gain
new fans at the same time. 

Trent:  (says nothing)

Jane: It's a chance to show those teachers what a success you've become.

Trent: (says nothing)

Jane: You'll get paid

Trent: I'll call Jesse (click).

(Cut to Daria getting into bed)

Daria is dreaming she is sitting in front of the TANK with Trent strumming
some light tunes on his guitar at night There's a candle casting a soft
light. 

Trent: We have a concert this Friday at your school. Will you be there?

Daria: Of course.

Trent: Cool, I knew I could count on you. Sometimes I don't think our
group reaches the cool girls like you.

Daria: Thanks(Daria shivers) It's cold out here.

Trent: Come here (he raises his arm).

(Daria snuggles under his arm close to him and closes her eyes. Daria
slowly awakensand notices her arm isn't at her side. She uncovers the
sheet and we see it across her chest going down to her legs (the rest if
covered by her sheets. She has one of those priceless looks of wonder of
her face.)

(END SCENE: la, la, la) -slow motion of Daria and Trent playing his guitar
in the dream
(cut to Jane and Daria eating Pizza)

Jane: That's a nice dream Daria. When are you going to act out the real
thing?

Daria: Aha, there's more. I woke up this morning in a uhstrange position.

Jane: Did you fall out of bed? I do that sometimes. Trent falls out of
bed, but never wakes up.

Daria: No, it was different. Janedid you ever have...uh..feelings "down
there"?

Jane: Feelings about Australia?

Daria: No, not "down Under", "down there".

(Jane raises an eyebrow)

Jane: Just what do you mean Daria (half-grinning)?

Daria: You're going to make me say it aren't you?

Jane: What are friends for?

Daria: Damned if I know.

Jane: Just tell me what you are talking about, I'm your friendnot your
parents.

Daria: Well (motions to Jane to come closer)

(scene quickly shifts to outside the pizza place)

Jane: That's so ..sweet. hahah
Jane's laughter can be heard.


SMACK!

Jane: Oww!

(cut to the dinner table)

Quinn: So then I tell Sandi "One has to have a beautiful mind as well as a
beautiful facewith bouncy hair too."

(Daria says nothing, she'd usually have a snappy comeback. Helen notices
this in another rare parenting moment).

Helen: You're awful quite Daria, is something wrong? 

(Daira snaps out of her trance) Daria: Huh? Oh I got an "A" on it.

Helen: That's not what I was asking about. Is something-wrong Sweetie?

Daria: Nothing a little mother-daughter talk would solve (said in her
sarcastic voice).

Helen: (recognizing her daughters true feeling) Okay, but if you want my
help I am here for - (Cellular phone rings)- "Hello? CALL DURING BUSINESS
HOURS!" -you sweetie

(Cut to Daria in her room)

Daria is pacing in her room thinking to herself, "They make this look so
much easier in Health class. What would the people do on "Sick Sad World".
Hmmm, they'd be me." She reaches for her phone and calls Jane. We see a
jagged line dividing the screen, Jane picks up the phone and answers it in
her great way.

Jane: Yo!

Daria: Hey Jane, I need some advice..


(cut to Daria in the Nurse's office the next day)

Nurse: Something wrong sweetie? Need a "band aid"? 

Daria: Did you know "Band Aid" is actually a brand name made by Johnson &
Johnson? Furthermore we use the TOPS brand adhesive bandages?

The nurse narrows her eyes as if to say, "Oh now I remember you." Or
"Another one of those people."

Nurse: What do you need before I call Ms. Li to get your smart-ass back to
class?

Daria: I'm in Study Hall, but I need to check out the uh pamphlets you
have.

Nurse: Sure, they're on that table over there.

She indicates a small table in the back of the room. The titles go from
one side of the table to the other: "Nutrition", "Ryes Syndrome and
Aspirin",  "Drugs", "Alcohol and You", "Birth Control", "STDs", "Safe
Sex", "Safe Sex=Fun Sex", and finally at the end of the table
"Alternatives to sex". Daria makes the trek across the table while feeling
the eyes of the Nurse. She hesitates, but has courage and picks up the
last pamphlet at the wall.

Nurse: Are you a "Discovery Channel" fan? You know: Explore your World?
(She smirks at Daria)

Daria says nothing and exits. Outside there's a "Back at Sign". Daria
changes the hands to 5:15 and smiles.

(end scene)

Daria is walking out of school with Jane when they pass Ms. Li scolding
the Nurse. Words such as "responsibility", "community", "students", and
"serving" and heard. Daria laughs softly and looks on with a "serves you
right" kind of look.

Jane: I am not sure I want to know why, but I know you had a part in that
little "talk" they were having.

Daria: You know me too well, I shall have to find new ways of covering my
tracks. It was worth it though, I got what I wanted.  (She shows Jane the
pamphlet)

Jane: Hmmm, well I've never had this conversation with a friend before,
but here goes: I've done it and I will talk about it to you if you want.
Oh and it's natural, no matter what the Republicans would have you
believe.

Daria: Thanks, just be your normal supportive self. (under her breath:
like you were at the pizza place).

(End scene)

Cut to Daria in her room climbing into bed. Thought: "Okay..I'm relaxed,
feeling open-minded, and thinking of something "warm". She turns out the
lights.

Commercial- slow motion of Ms. Li pointing her finger at the school Nurse.

(Day of the concert, Jane and Daria are walking to school)

Daria looks a little haggard.

Jane: Unlike guys, we can talk about thisright?

Daria: There's nothing to talk about, I didn't do anything.

Jane: What  went wrong?

Daria: Have you ever pulled the trigger and nothing happened?

Jane: I keep all my firearms in perfect working order and loaded.

Daria: You don't have any handguns.

Jane: None you know about.

Daria: Well I jumped out of the plane, but the parachute just wouldn't
open. In other words..

Jane: You weren't in the mood?

Daria: Bingo.

Jane: You can't rush this sort of thing, just do it when you feel right
about it.

Daria: Thanks

Jane: It's always the simple things in life that have the easy advice
lines.

(cut to school arena, afternoon set-up)

Jodie: Thanks for helping out.

Daria: I wanted to help out.

Jodie and Mack are walking away, when they suddenly REALIZE what they've
heard and do a double take and look back in shock.

Daria: Did Trent tell the band where they are playing tonight?

Jane: I know he'll time it perfectly, perfectly for Trent that is.

(cut to Mystic Spiral loading up "The Tank")

Jesse: Glad you kept the Tank, it also doubles for a good APC.

Max Tyler (Drummer): It's all good man. Where's this battle?

Trent: UhLawndale ..(high school said really softly)

Jesse, Max, and Nicholas: HIGH SCHOOL?!

Jesse: Dude, we're done with that place.

Max: Yeah, I've hit it too many times already.

Nicholas (Bass Guitar): Yeahhhh (Looking kind of stoned, sounding lower
key than Jesse)

Trent: We'll win and get new fans at same time

All three: (silence)

Trent: We can show all the teachers as what a success we've become!

All three: (silence, with rolling eyes)

Trent: We get paid.

Max: In the van!

(Mystic Spiral boards the van in military fashion, single file and fast)

(BATTLE OF THE BANDS)

We see several quick shots of groups that range from outrageous costumes,
to pseudo-intellectual types (in all black), to little quintets, a few
solo acts, and Mystic Spiral. Ms Li takes center stage wearing earplugs,
she still is speaking too loudly.

Ms. Li: WELL WASN'T THAT GREAT?!
(The audience covers their ears, after hearing an entire concert, and
wince in pain)

Jodie comes out on stage and grabs the mic 

Jodie: Thank you Ms. Li.

Ms. Li: Wait I have some interesting news for the student Body

Jodie: Later Ms. Li, (Ahem). Well it is time to vote. We have narrowed it
down to three finalists. And here they are: 4 Blondes, Candy-Ass, and
Mystic Spiral. Who votes for 4 Blondes? 

Audience responds in high pitch! 

Jodie: Who votes for Candy-Ass?

Audience responds with 50% of the applauds for the former group.

Jodie: Okay..Candy-Ass, warm up the bus. 4 Blondes have a commanding
leadwho votes for our last group, Mystic Spiral?

Audience responds in high pitch at first, tying 4 Blondes. 

Ms. Li: In the case of a tie, no winners.

Trent walks on stage, causing a higher pitch of screams from other girls.

Daria is scene with an angry look on her face.

Jodie: We have a winner! 

(Cut to the parking lot at night, Jesse and Trent are loading The Tank

Jesse: How much did we make?

Trent: Plenty, we'll have to do schools more often.

Jane: You guys still have "The Tank"?

Trent: Our drummer is borrowing my car, return favor for letting us it to
go to Alternapalooza. It's also our turn to store the equipment

Daria: Yeah, the cornfield put on a really great show.

All laugh. Trent: Good one Daria.

Daria: Uh thanks

Jane: All set?

Trent: Yeah, let's go. Jesse, you drive.

Jesse: Cool

(cut to drive home, Daria and Trent are in the back)

Trent: Could you put the heat on? It's getting chilly in here.

Jesse attempts to switch on the heat, but the switch comes off in his
hand.

Jesse: Sorry, the heat switch is broken, I'll fix it tomorrow.

Daria: Here, you can (Daria begins to take off her shirt to offer as a
blanket, but before she can finish Trent thinks she's offering to get
under her arm/jumps on the opportunity).

Trent: Thanks, it's getting pretty chilly.

Daria: get close to me

Daria stops thinking and holds back, smiling another "Road Worrier" smile.

Jane to Jesse: That's funny, the heater was working fine last time.

Jesse: Yeah

(Cut to Jane and Daria walking to school next morning)

Jane: You have a good time last night.

Daria: It was okayokay I had a really good time.

Jane: Did you uh sleep better since the last time you saw Mystic Spiral in
Concert?

Daria: Much better.

La la la la

Closing Music: "Crash into Me" -Dave Matthews Band
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