Disclaimer: Daria and associated characters are owned by MTV. This is fan fiction written for entertainment only. No money or other negotiable currency or goods have been exchanged.

This story occurs in between scenes of episode 313, Jane's Addition.


by Richard Lobinske


Monique's Subtraction


(Opening credits)

(Exterior view of the Lane house. Daria, clearly upset, exits through front door and rapidly walks away)

DARIA (VO): I don't believe it. Jane's mad and blames me for last night. If Tom's "good friends" hadn't blown him off, we wouldn't have this mess. The one night this week I got to spend with Jane, and Tom had to show up anyway. Dammit! I only wanted to spend time with my only friend. Is that too much to ask? Not to be left in the dust?

(Daria walks along the sidewalk)

DARIA (VO): And Trent. Two weeks to compose thirty lousy seconds of music and nothing.

(Daria stops and looks down at the ground)

DARIA (sad whisper) I had faith in him. So much for faith.

(Just as she starts walking, a black sports car pulls up beside her and the tinted window rolls down to reveal Monique)

MONIQUE: Daria, right?

DARIA: Um, yeah. At least for this lifetime.

MONIQUE: Need a ride?

DARIA: I, um...

MONIQUE: I don't bite.

DARIA: My house isn't that far.

MONIQUE: You look a bit down, thought I'd offer.

DARIA (sighs): What can it hurt? I'm not feeling that energetic.

(Daria enters the car. Cut to a view through windshield as Daria closes door and the car starts moving)

MONIQUE: Where to?

(Daria looks out side window and continues looking through most of the conversation)

DARIA: Over on Glen Oaks Lane, about halfway to the high school.

MONIQUE: Where Trent stayed when his family was in town?

(Daria looks cross and hurt)

DARIA: Yeah, that's it.

MONIQUE: That was really cool to let him and Jane stay.

DARIA: I guess.

MONIQUE: I remember; Trent called you the coolest high schooler he knows.

DARIA: Yeah.

MONIQUE: Hey, still got that belly ring? I bet you look cute as a button with it.

DARIA: The hole closed up.

MONIQUE: Bummer.


(They ride in silence for a few moments. Cut to a side view of Monique's car pulling into a convenience store)

MONIQUE: Hope you don't mind. Be right back.

DARIA: I can wait.


(View through the windshield of Monique's car. She enters it carrying a small paper bag, which she sets on the back seat)

MONIQUE: Sorry, backed up with lottery players gettin' last night's numbers.

DARIA: Wouldn't it be more accurate to call them delusion tax payers?

MONIQUE (chuckles): Delusion tax. Good one.

(Monique notices Daria is still looking away)

MONIQUE: Hey, somethin' wrong? You ain't looked at me since you got in.

(Daria turns to face Monique and sighs)

DARIA: I'm not in a good mood.

(Monique shrugs and starts the car)

MONIQUE: I figured. You can talk if you want. (pause) Or not.



(Exterior view of Morgendorffer house. Cut to the living room with Jake seated on a sofa reading the newspaper and Helen seated nearby looking toward the stairs)

HELEN: Is it me, or has Daria been bad-tempered lately?

JAKE: Last Tuesday.

HELEN: Jake! I said; has Daria been bad-tempered lately?

(Startled, Jake puts the paper down)

JAKE: Bad-tempered? What? No? I'm not...certain.

HELEN (stands in full rant): Dammit! Don't you even pay the slightest attention to your own daughters? Daria's been stomping around this house all week, biting off anyone's head at the slightest provocation!

JAKE: Maybe it's that time of the...you know...

HELEN (yelling): No! This is not PMS! She's not due for another two weeks!

JAKE (confused): How do you know...?

HELEN: Never mind that!

(Helen walks to the larger corner window of living room)

HELEN: I haven't seen Jane around all week. I think something bad is going on here.




(Exterior view of Morgendorffer house with Helen's silhouette visible in the corner window, moving angrily. Monique's car pulls up in front of the walkway. Cut to a view through windshield of car to Monique and Daria)

DARIA: Um...Is that offer to talk still open?

MONIQUE: Yeah.

DARIA: Can we go someplace else?

MONIQUE: Don't feel like facing the 'rents today?

DARIA: I've been kind of...well...in a bad mood lately. Mom's already got a head of steam up. If I'm not already the target, I will be.

MONIQUE: My place?

DARIA (nervous): Um...where is it?

MONIQUE: I'm in one of those rowhouses facing the tracks on the other side of Netter's woods from downtown. Not too far.

(Jake's silhouette joins Helen's in the window. Their movements show anger)

DARIA (slides down in seat): Let's go.



(Inside view Monique's apartment. The apartment is well cared for and neat, with simple furniture in good shape. The music and movie posters adorn the walls to show her goth leanings. Monique and Daria enter and Monique goes to kitchen with the paper bag)

MONIQUE: Grab a seat, be right back.

(Daria looks around. Next to the sofa are three guitars on stands, two are electric and one is a classical acoustic. She sits on the sofa and waits. Monique returns with two wine coolers, she holds one out to Daria)

MONIQUE: If you want it.

(Daria tentatively accepts the bottle)

DARIA: As long as you're not planning on taking advantage of me.

MONIQUE (laughing): Trust me; you ain't got what I'm after.

(Daria takes a sip from the bottle)

DARIA: Tastes like a raspberry soda. I suppose that's the idea.

MONIQUE: You got it. Now, what's up?

(Daria takes another drink and continues to take drinks throughout the conversation)

DARIA: This sounds silly.

MONIQUE: Maybe not.

DARIA: I've been...oh God, I can believe I'm saying this...I've been mad at Jane over a guy.

MONIQUE: You aren't the first, trust me.

DARIA: No! Not like that. (she gazes around the room) I can barely stand him.

MONIQUE (smiles softly): But Jane likes him.

DARIA: Yeah.

MONIQUE: Been spending a lotta time with him.

DARIA: Yeah.

MONIQUE: And you feel left out.

DARIA: Sounds like you know what I'm talking about.



(Inside view of Quinn's room with her seated on bed and talking on the cordless telephone)

QUINN: Oh, thank God it's passé. My parents were acting so freaky when we got home from Alternapalooza last year. I don't even want to think about what they...

(Helen opens the door)

HELEN: Quinn, where's your sister?

QUINN: One moment. (puts hand over telephone) Mo-om. Like I have time to waste keeping track of her? Have you tried that friend?

HELEN: I'm worried about Daria. She's been terribly cross lately.

QUINN: You mean bitchy.

HELEN: Quinn!

QUINN: Well, she has.

HELEN: I don't want you using that word.

QUINN: Okay. I won't, and no, I don't know where Daria is. Can I please get back to my important phone call now?

HELEN (sighs): Yes, dear.

(Helen backs out of the room)

QUINN (to telephone): Sorry, Sandi. My mom was looking for my bitchy cousin.


(View of Morgendorffer living room. Helen comes down the stairs and walks over to Jake, who is watching television)

HELEN: Nobody answers at Jane's and Quinn hasn't seen Daria. I guess we'll have to wait until she gets home.

JAKE: Sure thing, honey. I think I can handle that.

HELEN: I have no doubt.



(Inside view of Monique's apartment with Monique and a tipsy Daria sitting on the sofa)

DARIA: What really pisses me off is Trent.

MONIQUE: What'd he do?

DARIA: Supposed to come up with thirty seconds of music for us.

MONIQUE: For what?

DARIA: For a class project. So far, all we've got is Beethoven's Fifth Moo and Oh Flushanna.

MONIQUE: That's why he's been samplin' weird sounds.

DARIA: Two weeks! I thought he could do it.

MONIQUE: Uh, when's it due?

DARIA: Tomorrow.

MONIQUE: Gonna fail or somethin' if you don't get it?

DARIA: I'm fine, but Jane will be up the creek.

MONIQUE: So why are you so mad?

(Daria drains the bottle and sets it on the floor)

DARIA: I had faith in him. I was a fool, wasn't I?

MONIQUE: Trent ain't what you'd call reliable.

(Daria closes her eyes and turns away from Monique)

MONIQUE (realization dawning): Oh.

(Daria gets up and goes to the window to look out)

DARIA: I'm sorry. Look, nothing ever happened. Hell, he doesn't even know.

MONIQUE: So that's why you were so glad to see me at Axel's.

DARIA: Yeah, getting talked into doing something stupid for a guy and one of his girlfriends walks in during the process. I was overjoyed. Almost as much as when you came by to get him at my house.

MONIQUE: Oh, crap.




(Interior view of Monique's car through windshield, with her driving and Daria in the passenger seat)

DARIA: Can you drop me off before the curve? I want to walk off more of that wine cooler before I face Mom and Dad.

MONIQUE: Yeah, good idea. You can walk straight, but you're still a little buzzed.

(Monique stops the car)

DARIA: Thanks. From what you said, I was probably lucky he never noticed.

MONIQUE: Trust me, you are.

DARIA: In a lot of ways, he's still a nice guy.

MONIQUE (a hint of sadness): He is.

DARIA: Well, thanks. And good luck with California.

MONIQUE: Thanks. I've been needin' to get the Harpies out of this burg.

(Daria gets out of the car and begins walking along sidewalk)

MONIQUE: Sweet kid. She'll get over it all, eventually.

(Monique's car drives away)



(View of Daria walking on sidewalk)

DARIA: Well, that was different. My first buzz was with my now ex-crush's on-again, off-again girlfriend. I hope it all clears before I get home and face Mom.

(Tom's car pulls up next to Daria and stops, Tom steps out of it)

TOM: Hey, Daria.



(View of Morgendorffer living room with Helen and Jake sitting on the sofa. When Daria enters through front door, Helen jumps up to greet her)

HELEN: Daria! How are you, sweetie?

DARIA (sighs): I've been better.

(Helen rushes over to Daria)

HELEN: Honey? What's wrong?

JAKE (waking): Wha? Oh, Daria. What's up?

DARIA: I haven't been able to do a thing with my hair all week.

(Daria starts walking up the stairs)

HELEN: Daria.

DARIA: My lipstick went rancid.

JAKE: Eww.

HELEN: Daria.

DARIA: Okay, okay. I give. My master plan to destroy the Fashion Club completely fell apart and I've been grumpy all week because of it.

(Daria exits up the stairs)

HELEN (shakes head): Daria.

JAKE: Master plan? Master plan? She's planning on taking over the world?

HELEN: Will you stop watching that stupid cartoon about those mice?



(Interior view of Lane front door. Trent opens it to show Monique)

MONIQUE: There you are. I looked all over for you yesterday.

TRENT: Hey Monique. Spiral was jammin' all night in Oakwood. What's...?

(Monique grabs Trent's ear and pulls him away from door)

MONIQUE: Talk.

TRENT: Oww.

(View of Lane kitchen with Monique and Trent seated at the table)

MONIQUE: Did you get that music done for your sister an' her friend?

TRENT: What?

MONIQUE: You promised to compose some music for them. Did you?

TRENT: They've been really raggin' on me. You know how that messes up my creativity.

MONIQUE: You didn't do it.

TRENT: Not yet.

MONIQUE (sadly shakes head): You dope.

TRENT: Not you, too.

MONIQUE: Yes, me. They needed it today.

TRENT: You know how I feel about deadlines.

MONIQUE: You don't have any idea of how much you let her down, do you?

TRENT: Janey? She'll punch me in the arm when she gets home and be over it. No big deal.

MONIQUE (temper rising): You stupid idiot! I'm talking about Daria.

TRENT: Daria? She's cool. Why would she be upset?

MONIQUE: For the same reason I'm upset at you. She trusted you and you let her down.

TRENT: Huh?

MONIQUE: You let her down and hurt her.

TRENT: Hurt her? How could I hurt her?

MONIQUE: You don't have any idea, do you?

(Monique gets up and goes to the front door with Trent following)

TRENT: Monique?

(Outside view of Lane front door. Monique opens it and turns to face Trent)

MONIQUE: Trent, pull your head out of your butt and think about it. Good-bye!

(Monique walks away angry)

TRENT (scratches neck): Man, why would Daria be hurt?

(Trent's eyes slowly open wide and he leans against the door frame)

TRENT: Ah, man.



(Exterior view of Morgendorffer front door. Trent walks up and stops in front of the door)

TRENT: I hope I can let her down easy.

(Trent rings the doorbell. After a moment, Daria opens it)

TRENT: Hey, Daria.


(Closing credits)


Thanks to my wife Louise for beta reading.

April 2005