Daria runs away after her ex-friend from Highland comes back to haunt her.


Disclaimer? (I couldnít think of the word)


I borrowed all the Characters from MTV. I plan to return them. I also borrowed the songs. Except for Red Van. Which I wrote.

All the made-up characters are in the Character study.


Character study!



Danny is a long-blonde-hair-doing-leather-jacket-wearing-unfortunate-Kurt-Cobain-look-alike with a thing for Daria,



Sye is a wannabe German that looks a little like Matt Belamy from Muse.



Morris is just an average guy. Looks a lot like the blonde guitarist from LostProphets. Without the combover.



Chris is the quiet one. Doesnít look like anything really. Just average.



Chaz is Ďthe best guitaristÖ.in Jamestowní Heís the pretty boy and looks a lot like Ville Valo with a bit of Davey Havok mixed in.


Scene 1


Good morning Lawndale! The sun shines on this beautiful Monday morning! Traffic rep---


Jane grabbed her radio, threw it out the window and drifted back to an uneasy dream.


Jane, I just can take living here. Itís exactly like it was in Highland. Iím going to screw it up again like I did back then. Iím not meant to have friends. Iím really sorry. But I know that Iíll just end up messing up again and I couldnít deal with causing you or Trent any pain.


Daria. No, you canít leave! I need you here; youíre the only proper friend Iíve had. What do you expect me to do? Youíre scared of messing up, so youíre just going to get out of here? Youíre so selfish.


See? Iíve already screwed things up. Jane, Iíve got to go. Iím sorry. Goodbye.




Trent: Janey? Janey! Wake up! Itís just a dream.


Jane: Huh? Trent?


Trent: Donít worry, Janey. It was just a dream.


Jane: It wasnít a dream. Sheís gone, Trent.


Trent: What? Dariaís gone?


Jane: Yeah. She left a week ago. Just after her 18th. Trent. Sheís not coming backÖ


Trent: Donít cry, Janey. Please donít.


He takes her into his arms and they both start to sob whilst the ending of Space Oddity by David Bowie plays softy in the background. Ground control to Major Tom, your circuits dead, thereís something wrong. Can you hear me Major Tom?


Scene 2


Good Morning California! Todayís weather is calm and clear with temperatures around 22 ļc. Traffic reports areó


Daria switched the radio off in her mothers SUV and stretched her legs.


Daria: Oh great. Another sunny day to make me feel completely crap.

I donít even know where Iím going or what Iím going to do. What a great life for me.I guess I should post that letter to Jane and then go find a job.


Daria wanders around the small town she still doesnít know the name of and soon finds a ĎHelp Wantedí sign in the window of a truck stop.


Daria: Excuse me? Iíd like to apply for a job.


Waitress: Sure! Just let me get the manager.


Manager: Hi! We have a waitress position up for grabs. No qualifications needed. Can you start immediately?


Daria: Ok. How much do I get paid?


Manager: $50 a week.


Daria: Thatíll do. Where do I find an apron?


Manager: Excellent!


Scene 3


Trent wakes up to find his tear-stained sister lying in his arms with a pained look on her face.

Then it all comes back to him.


Trent: Janey?


Jane: Hmm?


Trent: We have to go find her. Why did she leave?


Jane: Sh-She said that she was afraid of messing our friendship up.


Trent: Oh. Iím going to make us some coffee. Coming?


Jane: Mmhmm. In a bit.


Trent: Iíll call you when itís ready, ok?


Jane: Ok. I just want to think.


Jane (Thought): Where are we going to find her? She didnít tell me where she was going. I miss her so much.


Trent (Shouting): Janey! Thereís a letter for you.


Jane (Shouting): You open it. I donít really care what it says.


Trent: Ok.


Trent opens the letter and gasps in surprise.


Dear Jane and Trent.


Iím sorry I left. I truly am and I just wish things could have been different.

I didnít tell you all of the reasons why I left, Jane. Theyíre so complicated. Iíll try and explain them in this letter but Iím not sure if I can.

Remember that new girl, Tessa? I know her. She was the friend I was telling you about at my 18th.

Tessa and I used to be good friends. Outcast with Outcast. Brain with Brain. Thatís how it was. But then one day Tess decided it would be cool if we stopped being brains and replaced it with Ďrebelnessí. I didnít want to because I was comfortable with being a smart person. I was only 13 and still learning about being a teen. Or maybe how not to be a teen.

Tess wouldnít hang out with me anymore and I was back to being a lonely, smart outcast.

When I moved to Lawndale and met you Jane. I forgot all about Tess and all that had happened there and I was happy with our friendship.

But then Tess came here. It all came back to me, Jane. How long would it be until you wanted to change too and I would be left? And I would have left you. I donít think I could handle it all over again.

Tess made sure I remember how I had deserted her too. She blackmailed me. She threatened me. Then she left me. She left me to make sure I knew how it felt to be left.

Janey, I donít know if you had noticed I couldnít be me anymore. I couldnít be sarcastic. I couldnít be cynical. Iíd changed. Tess made sure I changed. She made sure I changed to a different person.

Iím not Daria anymore. I donít know where Daria is. Probably buried deep underneath this mess.

Iím sorry. Iím so, so sorry.

I just want to say Jane, you were the best friend I could ever have had. I love you.

And Trent. You know Daria.

All my love



Trent: Uhh. Janey. You might want to read this. Itís from Daria.


Jane: Daria?! Give it!


Trent: Man. Sheís really screwed up.


Jane: Yeah. Sheís crazy. Iím going to kill this Tessa girl. It wasnít even Dariaís fault.


Trent: I know, Janey. Where did the letter come from?


Jane: Jamestown. California.


Trent: Lets plan a road-trip.


Scene 4


Daria: Hi, Whatíll it be?


Customer: I havenít seen you working here before. Are you new?

Daria: Yeah. Iíve been working here for about a month.


Customer: Cool. Iíll have a burger and fries with a cup of coffee.


Daria: Ok. Be right back.


Customer #2: Havenít I seen you play at The Un-aided?


Daria: Yeah. I play there twice a week to make some extra cash.


Customer #2: Youíre good. Nice songs. You write them?


Daria: Yeah. Song writing isnít one of my strong points. Iím more of a story/poem writer.


Manager: Daria! Stop chatting! We have customers!


Daria (Mumbling): Sorry.


Customer #2: Iíll see you tonight.


Daria: Yeah.


Scene 5


Daria sitting on a stage playing an acoustic guitar singing.


I'm lookin' at the world through tired eyes
I'm believin' that today will be different
I'm thinkin' that maybe someone does love me
But I'm rememberin' that I'm alone in this city

Oh I wish for a brown paper surprise
Oh I wish for someone to hear my cries!

Oh, red van!
Why wont you bring something for me?
Why do you deliver to every house but mine?
Oh, red van!
What's wrong with me?
What's wrong with the number 29?

I'm feelin' like no one wants me
Like the damp weather on august 15th
But why, must I be forgotten like a happy memory?
Because bein' alone, can't be what's me!

Oh I wish for a brown paper surprise
Oh I wish for someone to hear my cries!


Daria: Thanks. Iíll be back for a second set sometime tonight.


Customer #2: Hey. Remember me?


Daria: Yeah.


Customer #2: Iím Danny by the way.


Daria: Iím Daria. Nice to meet you.


Danny: Likewise. You have a good voice. It goes well with an acoustic.


Daria: Thanks.


Danny: Youíre not from California, are you?


Daria: Nope. Iím from Lawndale. And nobody really told me what state that was in.


Danny: Hehe. Iím not sure where that is either. How did you come to Jamestown?


Daria: I ran out of gas.


Danny: Hehe. You want a drink?


Daria: Um. Sure. A beer would be nice.


Danny: Sure thing.


Daria: Thanks.


Danny: No really. How come you came here?You got family?


Daria: Nope. Itís a long story.


Danny: Oh. Ok.


Daria: I mean, Iíd rather get to know you first before I told you everything.


Danny: Hey, thatís cool.


Daria: Thanks. So how old are you anyway?


Danny: 20. You?


Daria: It was my 18th last month.


Danny: Well, happy birthday.


Daria: Hehe. Thanks.


Danny: I think youíre up.


Daria: What? Oh yeah.


Danny: Good luck.


Daria. Thanks. Again.


Daria (Onstage): Hey again. This song Iíve never played here before. A good band called Mystik Spiral wrote it.

Here it is: Behind My Eyelids.


As lashes close

I see my woes

Spread out like a carpet of bugs

In absence of light

Pass visions of night

As shallow graves left half dug


Behind my eyelids

Is a world you cannot see

A place just for me

Behind me eyelids


You watch a tear

It trickles clear

And glistens on my skin

My liquid pain

Oh, world profane

Please, baby, let me in




Scene 6


Jane: TRENT! Itís been 4 weeks! When are we going to find her?


Trent: Whoa, Janey, Chill. We just need to get some more gas money and money for food.


Jane: I canít chill Trent! This is my best friend! She could be dead for all I know. Why donít we just drag Jesse along? He can get the money for us.


Trent: Janey! Why didnít I think of that?


Jane (teasing): Iím smart youíre not.


Trent: Shut up.


Trent (Phone): Yo, Jess. You want to come on a trip with Janey and me to find Daria?


Jesse (Phone): Sure dude. You need money, donít you?


Trent: (Phone): Yeah. Is that a problem?


Jesse (Phone): Course not man. How much do you need?


Trent (Phone): About $100. Come round early tomorrow.


Jesse (Phone): Noon it is. See you!


Trent (Phone): Thanks dude.


Trent: We set off tomorrow around 3:00pm.


Jane: I knew it only look some screaming.


The next morningÖAfternoon.


Jesse: Yo bro. You ready to get going?


Trent: Yeah.


Jesse: Where are we going?


Trent: California. Jamestown.


Jesse: Cool. How do you know she hasnít moved from there already?


Trent: We just got to hope. Janey hasnít got any more letters telling her otherwise.


Jesse: Yeah. But you still donít know for sure.


Trent: Look dude! Janeyís got her heart set on finding Daria. Sheíd die if we donít find her.


Jesse: Donít you mean youíd die if we donít find her?


Trent: Ió


Jane: Are we going or what?


Scene 7


Danny: So you ran away from the two best friends you had ever had because some girl messed with your mind.


Daria: Basically.


Danny: What were your friends like?


Daria: They were. Amazing. I mean Jane was the first Lane I met and we hit off straight away because we were outcasts in school. We had to take this dumb self-esteem class from this teacher who knew nothing at all. Jane was the best friend Iíd ever had. Sheís an artist and wow; sheís great at it. She knows just how to capture the obscurity of a seemingly normal picture.


Danny: Sounds like quite a girl. What about the other one?


Daria: Oh yeah. Trent.


Danny: Boyfriend?


Daria: I wish. Trent was the laziest and messiest guy I knew.


Danny: Whoa. Laying on the flattering a bit thick there.


Daria: Hehe. He was also the nicest most understanding guy I knew. He could just look at me and know what I was feeling. I wish I could say the same about me. Sometimes I would wonder what went on in his head. But I do know how he thought. I think I loved him.


Danny: Unrequited love. Sweet.


Daria: Shut up. You sound like Jane.


Danny: Are you calling me a crazy artist woman?


Daria: Yes.


Danny: I suppose I can work with that.

Daria: So tell me about you. Why do you live in this scary town in California?


Danny: Nothing quite as exciting as you. No crazy woman from the past.


Daria: Not even your grandmother?


Danny: Of course not! My granny knits sweaters; bakes cookies and drinks prune juice.


Daria: I rest my case.


Danny: Iíve always lived here. Itís a lot more exciting than you think. Wait. No it isnít.


Daria: Hehe. So what do you do?


Danny: Iím in a band and I work at a pub called Pothole Green.


Daria: They really know how to name their pubs donít they?


Danny: They sure do. So the band and me heard you last night. We all agreed that you should join us. Weíre desperately in need of a rhythm guitarist and female backing vocals.


Daria: If youíre called Helpful Corn, there is no chance.


Danny: Darn it. How did you know our name? Hehe. Nah. Weíre called the Unhelpful Wheat.


Daria: I hope to god youíre kidding.


Danny: Me too. Weíre called Downlift


Daria: Youíre on. Iíve never played an electric though.


Danny: Donít worry, son. Youíll learn from the best.


Daria: You know Hendrix?


Danny: Nope. I should have made it clearer. You will learn from the best in Jamestown. Want to come round my place and meet the rest of the band?


Daria: Yes, O driver of chariot.


Danny: How rich do you think I am? Us little people use horses.


Daria: Iím sorry then. I only associate with people that drive chariots.


Danny: Darn it . . . You coming?


Daria: Yes.


At Dannyís house. In the basementÖ..Familiar?


Daria: Why do all bands play in the basement?


Danny: Guys. This is Daria.


Daria: Hello guys. Do any of you young fellows own a chariot?


Chaz: Yes. Itís out back with my cape and top hat.


Daria: Excellent.


Chaz: Iím Chaz. Lead guitar.


Chris: Chris. Bassist.


Sye: Ich bin Sye. Keyboards.


Morris: Iím Morris. Drummer.


Daria: And that leaves our very own. Danny. As vocals.


Danny: And the lovely Daria as rhythm and backing.


Sye Die tollness of it all.


Daria: I agree, Hitler.


Morris: Lets get down to some music.


Chris: Yeah. Daria. Can you read music?


Daria: I can read chord letters if thatís what you mean.


Chris: It is. Brilliant. We have a gig in a weekís time. Weíre doing about 10 songs or so. So today weíll play you the first 5. Then you can join in on guitar playing and weíll lend you CDís to learn the songs.


Daria: I like a little structure in my life.


Sye: Das ist gut!


Morris: Uh. Yeah. So here are the songs with tabs and chord numbers.


Daria: Hmm. HIM Ė donít fear the reaper, Nightwish Ė Phantom of the opera, David Bowie Ė Andy Warhol, Metallica Ė Until it Sleeps, Bob Marley Ė Redemtion Song.

Danny: Those are the first five. Donít fear the reaper is like a duet thing.

Daria: Cool. Iíve heard a few of these.


Chris: We were wondering if you wanted to do your Red Van song too?


Daria: Uh. Sure.


Morris: Cool!


Sye: Ja!


Daria: Hitler, are you really German?


Sye: Uh. No.


Daria: Damn.


Danny: Heís just a German fanatic


Daria: You have weird friends.


Danny: I have friends?


Daria: My mistake.


Sye: Ach nein!


Scene 8


Jane and Jesse (singingÖ. badly): I try and try to forget you girl but itís just so hard to do. When you do that thing you do.


Jane: I love this song!


Jesse: I know! Itís great!


Trent: UhhÖWhere are we going?


Jane: California.


Trent: Oh yeah. Jess? Do you want to take over? Iím kind of tired.


Jesse: Youíve been driving for half an hour!


Trent (grumbles): Fine.


Jane: Hey Trent. Whatís this Jesse tells me about you dying if we donít find Daria?


Trent: Jesse!


Jesse: Sorry dude. But itís true. Iíve seen you pining away these past few weeks. You need her man.


Trent: She doesnít even like me.


Jane: I can vote on that. She started to hate you right after you forgot about out project. She has a big thing about these grade things I keep hearing about.


Trent (dejected): I knew it. Why do I pick the wrong people?


Jesse: Because youíre downright stupid?


Jane: You have no brains?


Trent: Arenít you supposed to be cheering me up?


Jesse: What?


Jane: Be careful Jesse. We need to help the less fortunate not torment themÖ


Trent: Shut up.


Jesse: So how are we going to get Daria to come back with us?


Jane: ErrÖ


Trent: Ask her?


Jesse: Trent, youíll have to use your manly charms on her.


Jane: Charms?


Trent: Iíll have to go with Janey on this one. She hates me.


Jesse: But she said you knew her.


Trent: A lot of good that will do. Sheís probably doing great with a boyfriend and a job.


Jane: This is Daria weíre talking about.


Trent: She changed remember?


Jesse: Hey! Heís making sense.


Jane: I guess. But how are we going to get her to come with us?


Jesse: Weíll just have to talk to her. Trent, you have to admit your feelings for her. It might be the only way.


Trent: But Ė


Jane: No buts Lane!


Trent: This is torture. I hate you all.


Jesse: Go to sleep. Iíll drive.


Trent: Thanks.


Trent climbs to the back of the tank drifts into an uneasy dream. Uneasy dreams seem to run in the Lane family.


Daria. I think Iím in love with you.


Oh. Um. Iím sorry Trent. I donít like you.


Trent: Dammit! I canít even sleep!


Jane: This canít be good.


Trent: Janey, whatís wrong with me?


Jane: I think youíre in love, bro.


Trent: This is all I need.


Jesse: Whatís so bad about it?


Trent: The girl I love ran away.


Jane: The story of your life.

Trent: Thanks for the sympathy, Jane.


Jane: Look. Weíre on our way to get the girl you love. Chill out a bit.


Trent (mumbles): I didnít even know I loved her.


Jesse: Trent, really. Did you bring your sleeping pills?


Jane: He has sleeping pills?


Jesse: Why do you think he sleeps such a lot?


Trent: Yeah. Theyíre somewhere here.


Jesse: Take them. Youíre not going to get any sleep like you are now.


Trent: Hmmph. Ok.


Scene 9


Chaz: Thatís D minor not major.


Daria: Dammit. I always get the two mixed up.


Chaz: Nah. Itís just because youíre not used to an electric. Letís try againÖ

D m





Daria: Yes! I did it. These songs are easy. Even for me.


Chaz: Hehe. Yeah.


Chaz: So you think youíre ready for the next practice?


Daria: Yeah. I learned the songs. All 10 singing wise. And guitar wise. I guess I just need one last practice before the gig.


Chaz: Perfect. The guys will be pleased. Have you and Danny got a thing going?


Daria: Danny? Nah.


Chaz: Oh right. You always seem to be joking around and stuff, you get on really well.


Daria: Nah. Dannyís just weirdly similar to me.


Chaz: Cool then.


Daria: Whenís the gig, by the way?


Chaz: Tomorrow at 7:00pm. Weíve got to be there for 5:30pm though.


Daria: Cool. Can you give me a ride?


Chaz: Of course, milady. Iíll pick you up at 5:20. Where do you live?


Daria: Uh. 29 Terrace Block.


Chaz: Uh. Let me write that down.


Daria: Iíll just meet you outside Terrace Block.


Chaz: Done and done.


Daria: Thanks.


Chaz: Anytime.


Un-Aided pub, Downlift are about to play their first song.


Danny: Hey guys. Remember us? Weíre Downlift. We played here last week.


Crowd applauds.


Danny: We would also like to introduce our new guitarist/backing vocalist. Daria!


Crowd applauds


Seasons donít fear the reaper, nor do the wind the sun or the rain. (We can be like them)Come on baby (donít fear the reaperÖ)ÖÖ.


A while laterÖ


Danny: This is going to be our last song written. and sung by Daria.


Daria: Hey. This is called Red Van.


I'm lookin' at the world through tired eyes
I'm believin' that today will be different
I'm thinkin' that maybe someone does love me
But I'm rememberin' that I'm alone in this cityÖ


Daria: Thanks again.

Danny: That was great! We kicked some serious ass back there!


Morris: Yeah dudette. You rock!


Sye: Ja! Du bist fantastich!


Daria: Shut up, Hitler.


Sye: Entshuldigung!


Chaz: Uh. Yeah bro.


Jane: Daria?


Scene 10


Jesse: Dude. Iím hungry.


Trent: Yeah. Me too.


Jane: Count me in. Where do we stop?


Trent: Uh. How about this place? The Un-Aided. Whoa. These people suck at naming things.


Jesse: So what? They have live music and food. What more could you want?


Jane: A - -


Trent: Donít answer that one.


Jane: Yeah. Lets just go eat.


They enter the Un-Aided. Sounds like something off the matrix.


Jesse: Cool band


Jane: Hey. Isnít that Daria? Setting up her guitar?


Danny: We would also like to introduce our new guitarist/backing vocalist. Daria!


Trent: Iíll take that as a yes. I didnít know she played guitar. Or that she sung.


Jane: I did. She didnít want anyone to know.


Jesse (singing): There can be miracles. When you believe.


Trent: Shut up Jess.


Jesse: Sorry.


Jane: Sheís good. This reaper song rocks!


Trent: I think Blue Oyster Cult did it. Sounds better with Daria singing.


Jesse: Come on loverboy. Lets get something to eat.


Trent: Donít call me that.


Jane: Touchy.


Barman: Hey guys! Whatíll it be?


Trent: UhÖ3 burgers, fries and 3 pints of Guinness.

Barman: Coming right up!


Jane: Way too perky.


Jesse: Yeah.


Barman: Here you go. These guys are good, arenít they? They have a regular spot here every week. The new girl fitted in right with them! Iím sure her and the lead vocalist, Danny, have something going on.


Trent runs to the bathroom.


Jane: Arenít girls the ones that are meant to do that?


Barman: Was it something I said?


Jesse: Iíll deal with Trent.


Jane: Ok. Mr. Barman? The one that ran to the bathroom is my brother. He is madly in love with my best friend, Daria there.


Barman: Shocking. I guess that thing about Danny did it.


Jane: You think?


The band plays on until Jesse and Trent come back for the last song.


Jane: You ok, bro?


Trent: Yeah. Sorry.


Jesse: Weíve got to talk to her.


Daria: Hey. This is Red Van.


I'm lookin' at the world through tired eyes
I'm believin' that today will be different
I'm thinkin' that maybe someone does love me
But I'm rememberin' that I'm alone in this cityÖ


Daria: Thanks again.


Danny: That was great! We kicked some serious ass back there!


Morris: Yeah dudette. You rock!


Sye: Ja! Du bist fantastich!


Daria: Shut up, Hitler.


Sye: Entshuldigung!


Chaz: Uh. Yeah bro.


Jane: Daria?


Daria: Jane?


Sye: Bernadette?


Everyone looks at Sye.


Sye: Uh. Got to go! Aufwiedersehn!


Daria: What are you doing here, Jane?


Jane: Looking for you, pumpkin.


Daria: Pumpkin?


Jane: Sorry, Jesseís rubbing off on me.


Jesse: I never say pumpkin!


Jane: Donít try your hippy-trippy mind games on me Moreno.


Danny: Iíll leave you guys to. Catch up. See you Ree.


Daria: Ree?


Danny: Uh.


Danny leaves.


Jane: Please come back, Daria. I need you. We need you.


Daria: Jane Iíve told you. I canít.


Jane: You seem like youíre back to your own self. Why not?


Daria: Because. I like living here.


Jane: More than you do with the friends youíve known for 2 years? I thought I knew you, Daria.


Jesse: Come on Jane. Weíll leave Trent to say what he needs to say.


Trent: Jessó


Jesse: Just do it Trent.


Jane and Jesse leave.


Trent: Uhh..Daria..?


Daria: Correct.

Trent: Daria. I. I uh. I think. Iím in love with you.


Daria: What?


Trent: I love you.


Daria: Why would you want to love me? Iím a coward.


Trent: Because youíre the only one that knew how I thought.


Daria: I donít know Trent. I do like you. But how would it work?


Trent: You would come back with me and we would live happily ever after. Or at least live ever after.


Daria: Trent. Ok. I canít hide it. I do love you. But - -


Trent: But what Daria? I love you and you love me. Thatís all we need.


Daria: Is it?


Trent: That and some money. Throw in a bit of food and weíre raring to go.


Daria (smiling): Ok. Youíre on.


Trent hugs Daria. Danny watches on jealously.


Daria (whispers): I think we have to get out of here.


Trent (whispers): Why?


Daria (whispers): Because Danny looks like heís going to kill you.


Trent: Good enough reason to me.


They grab Jesse and Jane, hop into the Tank and not so speedily travel into the sunset towards Lawndale.


What? Youíre thinking. What about the other guys? The crazy German fetishist, DannyÖand the rest of the guys?

Well. The band still went on. They got another guitarist/backing vocalist. Danny got over Daria. And they all lived ever after.