"Let Me Call You Sweetheart"

By Kelly
Summary: Daria has some adventures...make that misadventures... and things make a change for the better...or worst, depending on your point of view.

Daria: (VO) Where did my damn journal get to now?

We see the fashion club in Quinn's room laughing hysterically, while crowded around a notebook

Daria slaps her hand over her eyes: Oh no, oh God no

Quinn (reading from the notebook): His eyes are like pools of wisdom, filled from years of experience. When I hear him express himself musically, it moves me to tears.

Quinn (from her own perspective): Oh my god, I can't believe Daria wrote this crap, I thought she was like...smart.

Daria bursts in the room with an angry look on her face

Daria: God damn it Quinn...what the hell are you doing with my notebook?
Quinn: Reading your diary silly, what does it look like?
Daria: (in a softer tone) It's not my diary Quinn.... only people who are happy write down the events of their lives in a diary. Its my...uh...journal...yeah, full of FICTIONAL stories.
Quinn: Oh puh-lease Daria! We all know who this is about...its that guy from that band...what's it called...
Stacy: Mystic Spiral
Quinn: Yeah!
Sandi: Stacy, how did you know that...are you listening to UNpopular music again?
Stacy (who starts talking a mile a minute): Oh gosh no Sandi! It's just that Quinn told me. Not that Quinn is listening to unpopular music. She just knows through Daria, who isn't Quinn's sister...she's her...uh.... third cousin by marriage twice removed.
Sandi: God Stacy, just shut up and I'll let it slide.
Stacy (in an exhausted voice): Thank you!
Tiffany: ...Yeah

Scene Two: We see Daria and Jane walking down the street

Jane: So she read your journal? How wrong!
Daria: I know.
Jane: No, I mean, since Quinn got to read it, shouldn't I?
Daria gives Jane a go to hell look
Jane: Okie dokie, I get the picture. It was full of your love for a certain musician who has eyes that are like pools of wisdom.
Daria: Exactly.
Daria stops walking and looks very angry
Daria: Wait a second, how did you know that?
Jane: I hate to tell you this, but word travels fast at Lawndale High, especially when it comes from the mouths of the fashion fiends.
Daria: I will get Quinn back, if it's the last thing I do, and I think I know exactly how to do it.

Scene three: The Lane household, basement, as Mystic Spiral is seen finishing "Ice Box Woman"

Trent: Cool guys, very cool.
Jesse: I think we're ready for tomorrow night.
Max: Yeah me too. Are you gonna invite Jane and Daria?
Nick: I think Daria's pretty hot.
Trent: Yeah I'm inviting Janey and Daria. But I wouldn't get too interested in Daria, Nick. I hear she's spoken for.
Nick: By who?
Trent: I'm not at liberty to say.
Max: Come on man, I think we all know who it is.
(Close up of Trent with his eyebrow raised)

Scene four: Jane's room later that day, she and Daria are sitting on Jane's bed, surrounded by clothing. Jane has out her paint.

Jane: Daria this is pretty cruel, even for us.
Daria: Nonsense, its perfect for us.
(Jane gives her a look)
Daria: Damn it Jane, don't try to talk me out of it. She read my journal.
(Another look from Jane)
Daria: It had personal stuff about me in it...
(Jane keeps up her stare)
Daria: ...and personal stuff about you in it...
Jane: Why the hell didn't you say so?! Let's get ready for Art 101!

(Montage of shots of Jane and Daria painting all over Quinn's clothes)

Jane: Is that everything?
Daria: Yep, her whole wardrobe except for the clothes on her back. Lets get these home before she returns from her fashion club meeting.

Scene Five: At first we see nothing, just hear a loud scream. Then we see Daria with a very satisfied look on her face. Next we see Quinn, tears running down her face, as she checks her closet and drawers and realizes everything she owns is now covered in paint.

Quinn (storming into Darias room): DARIA!! How could you?
Daria: Payback is a bitch.
Quinn: Daria, you ruined everything I owned, everything that meant anything to me. How could you? (Quinn looks defeated, but remains silent as tears fall down her face)
Daria: Oh hell.
Daria (gets up and walks over to Quinn): I'm sorry. It's just that you read my personal, private thoughts, and if that wasn't bad enough you let all your friends read it too. How do you think that made me feel?
Quinn: Daria, I only did that because I wanted to get to know you better, you never talk to me. And my friends talked me into it. You know I can't take peer pressure. But what we found out will be forgotten, you took everything away from me. My clothes were my identity, and now I have nothing worth recognition.
Daria (who now feels really bad): Look, I'm sorry, and I know this won't replace it all, but it's all I have.
(Daria pulls out $500, and hands it to Quinn)
Quinn (suddenly looking bright and cheery): Thanks!
(Quinn runs out of Darias room, we hear the front door slam, as she is headed presumably to Cashmans)

Scene Six: Daria is laying face down on her bed when the phone rings. Once...twice...

Daria (Answering the phone): What?
(We see a split screen with Jane)
Jane: Well hello to you too, Sunshine.
Daria: What do you want Jane?
Jane (In a mock-Sandi voice): Well I heard that this really cute band is playing at the Zen tonight, and I was wondering if you would like to accompany me.
Daria: Whatever.
Jane: Whoa, my Sandi voice usually does it for you. What gives kiddo?
Daria: Quinn made me feel horrible for messing up her clothes, and then out of sympathy I give her all my money, and she takes off to Cashmans before I can blink my eye. I get no joy out of torture anymore. I'm just an old softy.
Jane (jokingly): That you are...but we love you anyways. Pick you up at 7. Bye!
(Daria grunts and hangs up the phone.)

Scene Seven: The Zen. Mystic Spiral is on stage, while Jane and Daria sit at a table talking.

Jane: I bet you can't wait for him to get done so he can give you some hot loving!
Daria: Shut up Jane.
Jane: Look at him up there, all sweaty. I bet you think he's sexy when he sweats.
Daria: Shut up Jane.
Jane: You guys have been going out for months now. Why don't you just tell everyone?
Daria: Tonight's the night. He was scared it would effect the band, but he's ready now.

(Up on stage Mystic Spiral is finishing up)
Trent: We're Mystic Spiral. Thank you guys for coming.
(Everyone hops off stage.)
Trent approaches Daria and gives her a hug.
Trent (whispering to Daria): Thank you for coming tonight Daria. It really means alot to me.
Daria: I wouldn't miss it for the world.

(Jesse walks over to Daria)
Daria: Hey Jess, that was great. All of you guys were wonderful.
Nick and Max: Thanks!
Jesse: Yeah, thanks.

(Jesse pulls Daria close to him and they kiss while everyone stares in disbelief except Trent and Jane)

Jane (looks at Trent): Why aren't you shocked?
Trent: Jess told me about a month ago. He said he had to tell someone. I was hurt at first, but I'm happy for them.
Jane: What is that supposed to mean?
Trent: You knew how I felt about Daria, Jane.
Jane: Uh, no I didn't.
Trent: I really like her...I mean liked her.
Jane (now the one looking shocked): What?
Trent: We'll talk about this when we get home.

(Trent and Jane say goodbye to Jesse and Daria. Trent has to drag Nick and Max away, because they are still in shock)

Scene Eight: The Lane household. Trent and Jane are sitting in the living room talking.

Trent: so you're telling me it didn't bother you at all?
Jane: Well it bothered me a little. I mean I had always had a little crush on Jesse, but I got over it. I want to hear about you.
Trent: Well, I always thought me and Daria connected. I liked Daria. I still do, but its too late I should have made my move sooner. She didn't like me like that anyways.
Jane: Wow, you are as oblivious as you seem. Daria was in love with you Trent. The girl worshipped the ground you walked on, but I really think she's into Jesse now. Speaking of Jesse, does he know how you feel?
Trent: Yeah, that's why he put off telling me. Daria felt that way about me?
Jane: Yeah, but now its too late....too late.... too late....too late....(Janes voice fades, and the image becomes blurry, it fades into white)

(We see Trent, wiping the sleep from his eyes)
Trent: Wow, that was one disturbing dream.... (frantically) I gotta tell Daria.