Set-up: Helen and the rest of the Morgendorffers have been invited by her boss to attend the retreat that future partners are sent to, delaying Jane and Dorian's Spring Break plans. Jane reads about an Spring Arts Festival in which prizes are being awarded and decides to enter so she has something to do while Dorian is away. When Trent eats her "art supplies", Jane goes ballistic. Will she finish the project in time? Will The Morgendorffers leave Quiet Ivy standing? Stay tuned!
Helen was sitting in her office going over her latest case file when her boss entered, holding a brochure in his hand. Helen's heart began to race as she realized what the pamphlet was for. It was her shot, her chance to become partner - one tiny slip of folded paper with the words Quiet Ivy on the front. Reading over the brochure, she scrolled down the part that made a sense of dread come over her. Her entire family was supposed to attend the weekend as well. Oh no - I promised Dorian that I would let him go to the beach with Jane. The retreat is for just the first weekend of spring break, they will just have to go after we get back. I'll talk to them when I get home. Eric told her to leave early so that she could get her family to fill out the questionnaires.
Dorian, Jane, Jodie, and Mack were sitting in the cafeteria talking about vacation plans. Mack was going to be working with Kevin and his dad while Jodie's parents had filled her plate with volunteer work. When Jane told the others that she and Dorian were going to the beach, they sat stunned. Not because Jane convinced Helen and Jake to let Dorian go, but that Dorian wanted to go in the first place. They knew that the words beach and Daria would never have been in the same sentence. Jodie wondered how the Daria side of Dorian felt about the upcoming trip. She figured that Daria was probably not too happy with the vacation plans.
Jodie's thoughts on Daria were one hundred percent correct. Daria's displeasure showed up the moment Jane told Dorian about her plan. That night, Dorian's "dream discussion" as he began to call them was not a pleasant one. Then again, they hardly ever were. When he told Jane the next day, Jane tried to reason with her, but the Daria side of him refused to listen. Jane stood her ground and Dorian felt the Daria part of his brain relent and stomp off in a huff.
As they walked home from school, Dorian and Jane saw his mother's car in the driveway. Looking at his watch, Dorian knew something was about to happen and he had a pretty good feeling he and Jane weren't going to like it. Opening the door, the teenagers saw Helen sitting on the couch. Signaling for them to join her, Helen moved over and placed the pamphlet on the coffee table. Dorian picked up the brochure and nodded.
"Eric must think you are ready to become a partner. Congratulations mom."
"Yeah - congrats Mrs. M," Jane said.
"Thanks Jane. That's actually why I came home early. See, the retreat is for the whole family and its supposed to last Friday, Saturday, and Sunday."
"I take it they want us to go this coming weekend," Dorian sighed.
"Yes. Now I know I promised to let you go to the beach with Jane and Trent so I wanted to talk to you about a compromise. I will pay for the hotel rooms if you are willing to move your plans to leave on Monday instead of this Friday."
"Trent's gigs aren't until Wednesday and Thursday. I'll talk to him tonight, but how are you going to be able to get our reservations changed this close to spring break?."
"Already arranged. Fortunately Jake has a couple of decent hotel chains as clients so I was able to get all of you rooms for the rest of the week. Your reservations are from Monday to Saturday night with checkout early enough on Sunday for you to be back for Easter dinner."
"You have yourself a deal Mrs. M."
"Thanks mom. Okay, we're heading to Jane's."
Helen stopped them and handed Dorian a piece of paper. "Good - now Dorian I need you to fill out this getting to know you questionnaire and Daria - don't get any ideas like putting down wanting to sleep upside down and spread rabies as career goals."
Dorian sat down on Jane's bed while she installed the video camera to her computer. As he filled out the questionnaire, Daria would chime in. Damnit Daria - are you trying to get us thrown into the funny farm? There would be no way to prove that what happened was because of a curse. I don't think you want to spend the rest of our life in an institution. Oh, but I love padded walls and I think a straightjacket would look so good on us. Dorian threw down the clipboard and buried his head in his hands. Hearing the commotion behind her, Jane stopped working on her camera. Seeing that her boyfriend was having an internal struggle with her best friend, Jane decided to give Dorian and Daria some time to hash out whatever argument they were having.
"I take it Daria wants to wreak havoc with the psych form you have to fill out. I don't blame her ... if it wasn't for the fact that I want the three of us to have a good time during the rest of Spring break I'd say go for it."
Dorian sat up and shot her an inquisitive look. "Jane - do you realize that you just said the three of us. Please tell me you mean me, you, and Trent."
"No - I meant me, you, and Daria. I know that as your own personality continues to grow, Daria will want to fight you more and more. By including her in our conversations, it might help both of you settle into being the best person you can be. I love the both of you, so please get along long enough to come back home after this weekend without being on medication. What do you say Daria - truce?"
In a voice not his own came her answer. "Truce."
Jane flashed a quick smile. "Good - now let me get back to work. I need to finish installing Janecam so that I have something to do while you're gone."
Dorian looked over at her as he heard Daria chime in. Didn't we read something about an art contest this weekend. You might want to mention that to her. Good idea, thanks. "Hey Jane - Daria just reminded me of an art fair that's happening this weekend. You could spend your time creating a masterpiece for that."
"Really? There's been this idea for a sculpture that I've had for a couple of weeks now. Thanks for the suggestion Daria. I think I'll do that but first -" Jane finished adjusting her camera, "meet Janecam all Jane all the time. Well except for naked and making-out time."
Dorian walked towards the camera. "At least I'll be able to see you while I'm away this weekend. Will you be working on the sculpture in here? I would like to be able to see it being made. I'll email you what I think of it."
"That sounds great. You know how I love working in front of an audience." Out of the camera's view, Jane kissed Dorian's cheek. He could feel the Daria side of him blushing.
Jane arrived at the Morgendorffers an hour before they were leaving for Quiet Ivy. Dorian was busy loading the car when he spotted Jane approaching. A slight smirk appeared on his face as she got closer. Closing the trunk of his father's sedan, Dorian turned and gave Jane a kiss on the cheek. As they walked to the front door, Dorian explained to Jane about his mother's rising stress level and his father's sudden addiction to milk. Once inside, Quinn flashed Dorian a 'make them stop now' look. Jane walked into the kitchen as a debate raged over who was driving. Seeing Jane, Jake waved as he grabbed the milk carton out of the refrigerator. She wished them a safe trip and went upstairs to hear Dorian reassure Quinn that every thing would be alright. Running into his girlfriend in the hallway, Dorian apologized and then led her to his bedroom.
"I just realized that you are leaving me for yet another weekend Mr. Morgendorffer. I am beginning to feel as though you want to spend more time with your family than you do with me." Jane tried her best to fake sounding upset.
"If you want to go instead of me, I will be more than happy to take your place at the art fair. I'll even shake my tush for you in front of Janecam while attempting to create a sculpture."
Jane raised her hand and began shaking her head violently. "No - no thanks. Just the thought of that image is going to give me nightmares for the rest of the weekend. Seriously though, try to have a good time and Daria - please behave. I'll miss you."
"I promise we'll play nice for the nice doctors. I'll miss you too. When do you have to have something submitted for the art fair?"
"Tomorrow by four. I filled out my application online last night. I did a rough sketch right before I came over here. I will probably start on it tonight. Well, I better get going. Wish me luck."
Dorian gave her a long kiss. "You don't need luck. I know that you're gonna blow them away. See you when I get back. I love you."
"I love you too."
They walked back downstairs to see Helen checking her watch and pacing. Jake grabbed the directions he printed and joined them in the living room. Quinn came downstairs a few minutes later and headed straight outside. The rest of the group soon followed. After everyone else got in the car, Jane assured them that she would jog by the house a couple of times while they were gone to make sure everything was okay. They thanked her and then backed out of the driveway. Jane watched them until their car was no longer visible. She was already counting down the hours in her head until their return.
It was a three-hour drive to Quiet Ivy and time was of the essence. They were required to be at the resort by no later than one. Drinking milk straight from the carton, Jake took his own sweet time driving causing Helen to become enraged. With about an hour left to go, Helen forced her husband to pull over so she could drive the rest of the way. In the backseat, Dorian and Quinn looked at each other and shook their heads. They knew they were going to be in for a long weekend.
Pulling into the front of Quiet Ivy, they were met by a team of doctors outside the door. Helen got out and introduced herself and her family. Handshakes were offered and accepted as the head counselor gave them a quick tour of the facility. They were then led to their rooms so they could unpack and relax a little before the first sessions with their individual therapists. Dorian looked around the pale yellow room and sighed. What - no padding? I'm a little disappointed here. Dorian had to agree with Daria on this one. After quickly unpacking, Dorian headed back towards the computer room and decided to go online to check out Janecam. Staring at the screen, he couldn't help but laugh as he saw Jane passed out on her bed. So much for watching her work on her sculpture this afternoon. Maybe she decided to try a performance piece instead by doing her impersonation of statue. He signed off the computer and was walking back to his room when an older woman approached him.
"Are you Dorian Morgendorffer?"
"Yes, I am."
"My name is Dr. Irvine. I will be your one on one counselor."
As Dorian followed Dr. Irvine to her office, they passed Quinn and her counselor in the hallway. Quinn was in already talking about the sale at Cashmans she was missing that weekend. Her counselor was already rubbing the bridge of his nose. She stopped long enough to acknowledge Dorian's and Dr. Irvine's presence in the hallway. Looking over at the lady walking with her brother, Quinn made a comment to her about not how white shoes were plain and boring. After arriving at her office, Dr. Irvine sat down and indicated where she wanted Dorian to sit.
"I am glad Jean-Michel got her instead of me. I don't think I could have handled the constant talk about fashion."
"Quinn's the Vice-President of our school's Fashion Club. She really knows about it, but tends to get carried away."
"What about you? Is there anything that makes you get carried away?"
"I think the closest thing that does that to me is writing. I don't get carried away, but when I am trying to come up with a story, I tend to over-focus or forget there are others in the room with me. I'm surprised Jane hasn't hit me a time or two with one of her canvases when I am trying to write at her house."
"Jane - is she your girlfriend?" Dr. Irvine asked.
"Yes ma'am. We have been friends since my family moved to Lawndale. Then we realized that there maybe something more for us and we started dating."
"Do your parents like her?"
"Yeah - they treat her and her older brother like part of our family."
"That's good. It's very rare that parents of teenagers like their son or daughter's choice in the dating department. How do you get along with your parents?"
"We get along pretty good. I mean, yeah, there are the typical teen/parents conflicts, but I know that when I need them no matter how busy they are, they will be there for me."
"I read that you are graduating next year. How do you feel about leaving your parents and Jane or do you plan on going to college in Lawndale?"
Dorian's stomach tensed up for a moment. "I want to attend Raft University, they have a really good writing program. I'm hoping to get Jane to apply to BFAC so she can come to Boston with me. I'll miss my family, but they will only be a phone call or an email away."
About twenty minutes later, a little buzzer went off on Dr. Irvine's desk. She shook Dorian's hand as he left her office. This time when he ran into Quinn, she was more animated than he had ever seen her.
"Jean-Michel hypnotized me and I had a past-life regression and guess what??!!"
"He hypnotized you?" It's a damn good thing I didn't get him for a counselor. Then we really would be put in the loony bin. Dorian shook his head, "He told you that you were a pony in a previous life?"
"No silly," Quinn punched his arm. "He said that I was Cleopatra in a past life. See, I knew that I shouldn't have made an F on that paper about Cleopatra's make-up tips. What are you about to do?"
"I'm going to check out Janecam on one of the computers."
Dorian and Quinn walked into the computer room and logged on to Janecam. This time Jane was awake and working feverishly on her statue. Dorian spotted a giant bowl on Jane's bed. By this time, Dorian and Quinn didn't notice a small crowd had gathered behind their computer. They watched as Trent walked in the room and began to talk to Jane.
"Don't scratch your butt - don't scratch your butt." Dorian said getting a slight laugh from not only Quinn but the people around them.
As Trent was talking, Jane was busy carving away on her statue oblivious to what is going on around her. Trent walked over to her bed and began grabbing handfuls of whatever was in the bowl on Jane's bed.
"I really hope those weren't paint chips," Quinn said between giggles.
As Trent moved closer to the camera, Dorian could see that Trent had a handful of gummi bears. After a couple of minutes, Jane sat down her statue and went to retrieve the bowl. Looking down into the bowl, Jane turned to her brother with anger in her eyes. The crowd could tell she is yelling at him as she hurled the last few gummi bears that were left in the bowl at Trent. Both Lane siblings stormed out of the room as Jane turned the lights out leaving the camera to go black.
"Oh crap - I think Trent just screwed up big time," Dorian sighed.
One of the women who had gathered behind them asked "Wow! What show was that?"
If Trent had turned around, he could have seen his little sister's eyes turn from azure blue to fire engine red. Before he could mutter out an apology, he took off out the door and drove to Jesse's. Now Jane had a bigger problem - not only was she out of gummi bears, but she didn't have a way to get anymore. Then, she remembered that Amy was going to be home. Running back inside the house, Jane grabbed the phone and dialed Amy's number.
"Hi, Lillian. Is Amy there?" Jane asked.
"She's in her office. Let me get her for you. Is everything okay dear?"
"Yes and no. I am trying to finish a sculpture in time to enter it in the Arts Fair this afternoon, but my bonehead brother ate my art supplies."
"Okay ... I'm sure his stomach isn't going to like him for that later on either."
Lillian knocked on the office door. Amy answered it with a look of frustration on her face. She had an article due by the end of the weekend and was having a horrible case of writer's block. Lillian handed Amy the phone as they walked towards the living room. As Jane retold her story, Amy nodded in agreement. Amy agreed to pick her up and bring her to PayDay before they closed. Amy and Lillian walked out the door and headed towards Casa Lane. Jane was standing out front, pacing back and forth. Lillian stepped out of the car so Jane could get into the backseat.
"Thank you for picking me up. Trent left here in fear of his life, so I doubt I will see him the rest of the weekend. I swear I don't know what gets into him sometimes. He watched me working furiously on my statue. He should have known not to touch my art supplies."
"I didn't know art supplies were edible." Lillian was confused.
Jane looked at Lillian and nodded. "When you microwave gummi bears, they melt into a stain-glass like mosiac and goop also works as a killer adhesive. I spent hours separating them into like colors and I was just about to bring them into the kitchen to heat them up - Trent decided to eat nearly the entire bowl. I was so mad that I just started throwing what few I had left at him."
Amy tried to give her a sympathetic look that lasted all of ten seconds before the giggles began. "I'm sorry, Jane. I can see Trent hurrying out of your room with his teeth covered in red and green goo." The rest of the ride to the store was filled with stories of all the things Helen and Amy used to do to drive Rita crazy.
They arrived at PayDay an hour before they closed. Andrea saw Jane and the others walking down the aisles. Amy tapped Jane on the shoulder and pointed at the PayDay employee heading towards them. Jane asked Andrea which aisle the gummi bears were on. Andrea had them follow her for fifteen aisles. Once they arrived at the candy, Jane thanked her. Andrea looked over at Jane for a moment before leaving the aisle.
"Could you do me a favor and not tell anyone from school I work here," Andrea said as she looked down at the floor.
"We never saw each other tonight."
After Jane checked out, she, Amy, and Lillian returned to Casa Lane. They went into Jane's bedroom where she showed off the sculpture she was working on. While Lillian was studying it, Jane went to check to see if anyone was watching Janecam. A few moments later, Dorian's sn popped up in the corner. Both of his aunts turned and waved at the camera. This time - Quinn, Jake, and Helen were standing behind him and watched as their family waved. Despite knowing that they couldn't be seen, they gave a tiny wave back.
Once Lillian was finished giving Jane some pointers, the two women left. They agreed to pick Jane up the following afternoon so that she could make it to the Arts Fair. Amy parked her car, unlocked the door, and headed straight for her office. Turning on her computer, Amy looked down at her keyboard and grinned. Soon her fingers were flying across the letters.
Family: Yeah - They Drive You Crazy, But Just Think Of How Crazy You Would Be Without Them.
Dorian awoke Saturday morning in a daze. His mind kept replaying a dream he had that night. It wasn't that it was unpleasant or disturbing, in fact the dream gave him a sense of peace and happiness. He decided to file it away until he was at home. As he walked out of his room, he met Dr. Irvine in the hall. Dorian asked her if the facility had a gym or an exercise room, she pointed to a tiny room next to the dining hall. She also mentioned to him a walking trail. Dorian thanked her and went back into his room and changed into his sneakers.
Forty-five minutes later, Dorian returned from his jog and just wanted to go home. A quick shower and change later, Dorian headed to the computer room and waited for the rest of his family to wake up. He knew that after breakfast, his parents had a couple's meeting then there was to be a family session at dinner. Turning on the computer, he logged onto Janecam. He was surprised to see Jane up and finishing the last touches on her sculpture. So that's why she needed the gummi bears. I wish I could tell her how much I like it without having to go through you. I will let her know. Jane walked over to the computer and saw Dorian's sn. She lifted the statue up like a Price Is Right model. A couple of moments later, Jane went and answered her phone. Once she hung up, she grabbed her sketchbook and began writing.
Amy and Lillian are on their way over to pick me up for the Arts Fair. Wish me luck.
"Good luck," Dorian whispered as he sent her an email.
While their parents were in their session, Dorian and Quinn watched Twister. That evening, they joined their parents for dinner. The head counselor at Quiet Ivy sat down at their table. An exercise in role-switching caused a heated discussion between his parents which led to his mother leaving the table and his father looking depressed. Dorian nudged Quinn, who got up and sat next to her dad to cheer him up. Dorian headed in the direction his mother went. A few minutes later, he found her trying to open the car door without her keys.
"Mom, what are you doing?"
"Oh, I thought I'd wait in the car until we were ready to go home."
"We're not leaving until tomorrow. You might need to use the restroom sometimes before then." Once he heard his mother give a slight laugh, Dorian decided to continue. "Yes, you are obsessed with your job. You're a lawyer, clients expect you to be. But you're there for us when we need you, too."
"How can you say that after ... after," Helen turned away from her son, "I should have told you, prepared you, warned you ... instead I buried it in disbelief."
"Mom, even if you had told me, I would have made some snarky remark about you were having a flashback moment to your commune days. That night - when I needed someone to help with the pain - you were the one that held me. And just like a good lawyer, you were prepared - despite the obvious need for skepticism. I also know that I wouldn't be anywhere near sane if you, dad, Jane, and Quinn hadn't been there for me. So don't worry about what that bitch in a dress two sizes too small said."
A few moments later, Jake and Quinn joined them outside. "Look, Helen -about the superwoman stuff, that wasn't me in there, that was the milk talking."
"No, Jake. We both said some things in the heat of the moment. Right?"
"Right. I think we should find out if there is any other sessions we need to attend and if not, let's go home."
"Sounds like a good idea to me. What do you think kids?"
"I was ready to go before we got here," Dorian replied.
"Do you think it will mess up your chances of making partner?" Quinn asked.
"I'll find that out on Monday, for right now I say start packing. We're leaving," Helen said as they walked back inside.
On the way home, Dorian called and left a message for Jane. When they pulled into the driveway, Amy, Jane, and Lillian were waiting for them. Dorian could tell from the Jane's face that the Arts Fair must have gone well. Dorian was almost tackled by Jane as he tried to get out of the car.
"I won! I won for the under 18 age group!" She said as she pulled him into a bear hug.
"Congratulations, Jane. I knew you had shot when I saw it this morning."
"Congrats Jane-O. What did you win?" Jake asked
"A trophy, five hundred dollars, and because Ashfield Community of the Arts was one of the sponsors, I get to attend their Summer Arts Program." Jane's eyes enlarged as she realized what she just said. "I guess I can't complain about you being gone a couple of weekends anymore."
"Don't worry about it. Let me help my dad get our stuff in the house, then we'll go get pizza to celebrate."
Two days later, Dorian, Jane, Jesse, and Trent left for the beach. That night, Dorian and Jane sat on their balcony and listened to the waves crash upon the shore. Jane leaned her head against him.
"Are you going to be okay this summer? I don't have to go," Jane said.
"Don't worry about me - I'm sure mom and dad will find something for me to do. Besides, you need to go - it will look really good on your college applications."
"Can you imagine what it would be like if we ended up going to college together?" Jane asked.
"Yes - yes, I can," Dorian replied as visions of a recent dream played in his head. "Are the twins asleep?" Jane asked. "Finally, did you finish your photography project?" "Yeah - did you finish your last story?" "Typed it up while you were giving the kids their baths. I guess that gives us the weekend to ourselves. I love you, Mrs. Morgendorffer." "I love you, too, Dorian."