Daria's Magical Interdimensional Bus

            "Well, now what?" Daria said despondently.

            "I just don't know," replied Jake. He and Daria were driving around town. "I mean, we've already been to every car dealership in town, and I STILL haven't found one car I think is best for you!"

            Daria sighed. "Maybe you should let me pick one for mysel-"

            "Hey look!" interrupted her father. "There's a place," he said pointing to a small lot with a banner on the gate, which read:


Magical Trevor's Discount Car Dealership


            "Magical Trevor?" said Daria. "Must be another one of those marketing gimmicks."

            "Well, it sure worked on me!" said Jake, pulling the car into the lot. As he and Daria stepped out of the car, they spotted a short man in a white wizard's robe that looked to big for him with the word TREV in the middle, wearing a white wizard's hat with a star dangling at the end. The man also had flowing orange hair and an orange beard, non-moustache. The short man turned around and welcomed them.

            "Why, 'Ello!" the man said, in a slight British accent. "I'm Magical Trevor and this is Magical Trevor's Discount Car Dealership. 'Ow may I 'elp you?"

            "Omigosh!" screamed Jake. "It's a real magician!"

            "Wow," smirked Daria. "It takes a lot to fool my Dad. Anyways, we're here looking for a car. Do you have anything?"

            "Oh, yes, most certainly," Trev replied. "And I think I 'ave just the thing for you. Follow me!"

            Trev led them to the back of the lot where he showed them what he was talking about: a travel bus. It was two stories tall, 20 feet long, jet black with orange flames on the front, and the word TREV on the license plate.

            "Wow, it's really big!" shouted Jake.

            "Oh yes," said Daria, in her typical sarcastic demeanor, "this is the perfect car for me."

            "I don't know," Jake contemplated. "Is this the best car for Daria?"

            "Did I mention I'm sellin' it for $250?"

            "Sold!" responded Jake, slamming the money onto Trev's outreached hand. "She's all yours, Daria!"

            "Hooray," murmured Daria, halfheartedly raising her hands in the air. "The car of my dreams...."


            "So this is the piece of crap your Dad wasted your money on?" Jane asked Daria.

            "Mm-hm," responded Daria. They were staring at the bus with a mixed air of wonder, fatigue, and, their prominent emotion, cynic criticism.

            "Look on the bright side," mentioned Jane.

            "What bright side?" replied Daria.

            "It's like the Grim Reaper of vehicles. It's large and imposing. Besides, I'm pretty sure if you pulled up to school in this, Quinn would wish she never even knew you," explained Jane.

            "You mean like she always does?" said Daria.

            "Yeah, pretty much," said Jane.

            "Well, it's got a plasma screen TV," said Daria. "Wanna go inside and watch Sick Sad World?"

            "The fans would be insulted if we didn't," quipped Jane. So, they entered the bus.


            "Oh my God!" squealed Quinn, as she and the rest of the Fashion Club approached the Morgendorffer residence. "What is that hideous piece of metal doing in our driveway?"

            "Maybe Metallica came to your house?" answered Stacy, in her usual chipper naive manner.

            "Oh please, Stacy," responded Sandi. "Like Metallica doesn't have better things to do than visit Quinn's lame sister."

            "Right. Sorry, Sandi," said Stacy, dejectedly.

            "It's like ... so big and ... dark," said Tiffany. "It's like ... the Grim Reaper of vehicles.

            "Whatever," Quinn said, as she and the Fashion Club entered the house. She saw her father sitting on the couch, reading the newspaper. "Dad?"

            "Yes, Quinn, honey?" Jake asked.

            "What's that giant metal behemoth doing in our driveway?" Quinn said.

            "Oh, that's just the car I bought for Daria," Jake said nonchalantly.

            "WHAT?!" Quinn shouted. "How come she gets a car? I've been asking for one for three years. She doesn't even ask for one and you buy her that?"

            "Now, Quinn," replied Jake. "If you want, why not get an after-school job and buy your own car?"

            "Uch!" Quinn snorted. "As if! Come on, girls. To my room." And with that, they left upstairs.

            "Boy, I remember the time I asked my dad for a car," said Jake. "I remember his exact words: You don't need a car! You got two legs, why don't ya use them! Boy, did I hate that man!"


            "Hey, Jane?" asked Daria.

            "Yeah, Daria?" replied Jane.

            "I have an idea," said Daria. "Now listen..." Daria leaned over and whispered something in Jane's ear.

            "Whoa," said Jane. "Now, that's just insane enough to probably work."


            "I can't believe this is happening, screamed Quinn.

            "Settle down, Quinn," said Helen. "Now that Daria's finally got her license, she's offered to take us on a small trip." BBRRRIIINNG! "Oh, damn that cell phone! Yes, Helen Morgendorffer? What? Marianne, I told you. I'm going to be out of town with the family for a few days. Well, I don't know, have Eric deal with. Okay bye." As soon as Helen hangs up the phone, she asks Daria something. "Where exactly are we going?"

            "Oh, I'm just driving around town, enjoying the sites, hoping that someone will get in my way, and then I 'accidentally' hit them, giving you another defense case to work with," responded Daria. Soon, she stopped, and she opened the doors. As she did so, Jane and Trent stepped aboard.

            "Whoa," said Trent. "This is soo much better than the Tank."

            Daria continued driving until she pulled up to the front of Lawndale High School. Jodie was there, and asked Daria something.

            "Is there any particular reason you called us all here, Daria?" asked Jodie. With her was Mack, and behind them were Brittany, Kevin, Andrea, Upchuck, the Fashion Club, Ms. Li, Ms. Barch, Mr. DeMartino, Mr. O'Neill, and Mystik Spiral.

            "One: to drive across town creeping folks out. And Two: show you guys my new car. It's worth every cent of the $250 my Dad spent on it," Daria responded. "Now climb aboard."

            As soon as everyone was on, Daria started driving. After a while, she passed the place she bought the car. When Trev the salesman saw her, he look frightened and started following them.

            "Think I should stop?" Daria asked Jane.

            "Well, he could explain what all these buttons are for," Jane replied, pointing at the dashboard. As Daria slowed down, Jane saw something that caught her attention; a glowing gold button with the words "Travel" on it, and underneath, a warning label reading "Do Not Press".

            "What the-" Jane said as she presses the button. Suddenly the car stopped. But not for long.

            Soon, the car started up again, and raced down the road, doing speeds of up to 115 MPH. Suddenly, up ahead, Daria saw something that resembles a wormhole.

            "This can not be good," she said as they enter the warphole. Once they enter, it closed, leaving Trev behind.

            "Oh, for the love of God," Trev shouted. "This is really reeaaalllly bad!"


            To Be Continued...