The Art
of
Seeing
©2008
The Angst Guy (theangstguy@yahoo.com)
Feedback (good, bad, indifferent,
just want to bother me, whatever) is appreciated. Please write to: theangstguy@yahoo.com
Synopsis: When Daria meets Jane in
an alternate universe, they discover things that the eye will never find.
Author’s Notes: Brother Grimace posed a challenge to me on PPMB to write a Daria alternate-history fanfic in which a character from that show chose a second path in life, following up on another interest the character had. The story had to have a happy ending. Brother Grimace further asked that the fanfic be in the first-person, take place before episode #101 (“Esteemsters”), use only male characters, and make the reader want to cry. I worked on it for a time, but the first-person viewpoint defeated me. So did every other additional criterion, depending on your viewpoint. Anyway, this story was the result.
The story came to me after I watched Daria episode #308, “Lane Miserables.” Jane has a brief conversation with her father during which he warns her not to drink from a container of silver nitrate in the kitchen. The implications of their talk grew into this tale. The script can be found at Outpost Daria.
Acknowledgements: My thanks go out to Brother
Grimace for the challenge. This story is respectfully dedicated to him as its
spiritual grandfather.
The
beta-readers for this tale were, in no particular order: Brandon League, Thea
Zara, Steven Galloway, TerraEsperZ, Crusading Saint, THM, Robert Nowall,
Voiceofmy, and Brother Grimace. My thanks to you all; I am in your debt.
*
Vision is the art of seeing
things invisible.
—Jonathan Swift
Daria
Morgendorffer first tried to get into the Zen on a Friday night at 7 p.m.,
which proved to be impossible. The line of people waiting for entry stretched
two blocks down Dega Street. She rethought her strategy, skipped the weekend,
and showed up on Monday afternoon at 4:10 p.m., walking directly there from her
after-school self-esteem class. The cool mid-November breeze balanced the heat
generated from her long walk, so Daria reached the Zen hardly breaking a sweat.
She
pushed open the glass door, catching a momentary glimpse of her thick auburn
hair, round glasses, green jacket, and black skirt. After wiping her boots on a
ruined mat, she took a few moments to let her eyes adjust to the semidarkness
before she went through the second set of doors to the main hall.
To
her relief, the afternoon crowd inside was of manageable size. She paused to
scan the large, poorly lit room in search of possible subjects for her English
paper. About sixty older teenagers and twenty-somethings were present, sitting
or standing in small, relaxed clusters with drinks in hand. A long wet bar ran
down the wall on her right and a sandwich-and-popcorn kiosk on her left, with
tables and chairs lining the edges of the room. The hardwood dance floor was
newly swept, though badly scuffed; above the center of the room hung three
glittering mirror balls. A faint whiff of pot was in the air, mixed with
unidentifiable incense and a stale hint of body odor.
Daria
saw no one who appeared to be a musician—no one carrying a guitar, at least—but
she was not discouraged. The bartender probably knew where they were, she
thought, so she wandered over to the wet bar to ask around and plot her next
moves.
The
only other people at the bar were a couple of teenagers on the verge of sucking
face and a teen girl in black, sitting at the end of the bar on a stool with
her back to the wall, looking at something in her hands. Daria took a seat
between the couple and the girl. She had a bout of self-consciousness, aware
that she looked every bit the high-school sophomore she was, as well as being
one of the smallest people in the room and a lone female. Except for a few
glances, however, no one seemed to care.
The
bartender glanced at her. Daria raised a hand. “Cola. Anything with caffeine
that isn’t diet.”
“Coming
right up.”
Daria
nodded and looked around the room again before turning back to the bartender,
who was filling a small glass with Cola Blast. “Is a live band playing
tonight?”
“Mystik
Spiral’s on at eight. They’ll do a tune-up session about five-thirty or so,
when the rest of them get here.”
Daria
was expected back home by eight. “Some of them are here now?”
“Yeah,
in back.” He put the Cola Blast on the wood-topped counter before her.
“Dollar,” he added.
Daria
had expected bar prices would be inflated, so she came prepared. She handed him
a dollar and pulled her drink closer. “Is there a chance I could talk to one of
them now?”
The
bartender laughed and shook his head. “I wouldn’t hit on them till sometime
after midnight,” he said. “They like to stay focused before a set.”
“I
wasn’t trying to hit on them,” Daria said with a frown. “I’m here to ask a few
questions for a class project.”
“Hey,
whatever.” The bartender grinned in a way that showed he didn’t believe a word
of it. “One of ‘em might walk out. Hang loose, see who turns up.”
Daria
turned around on her stool and scanned the room again, sipping her cola and
thinking dark thoughts about the bartender. She realized too late that groupies
would be a big part of any scene with a rock band, even a small-time cover band
like Mystik Spiral. The bartender had probably heard every excuse in the book.
“If
you don’t mind my asking,” said the girl in the corner at the end of the bar,
“what kind of class project is it?”
Daria
looked at her. The girl wore black walking boots, a pair of black jeans, a red
t-shirt with “Mystik Spiral” written on it in Gothic letters, and a black
leather jacket. Her jet-black hair fell past her shoulders like a waterfall,
shrouding her face. She wore sunglasses as well, which struck Daria as an odd
but not unexpected affectation in a place like the Zen. In her long fingers,
the girl carefully worked a lump of clay.
“It’s
for English,” Daria said. “I have to write a paper on originality. An original
paper at that.”
“On
originality?” The girl’s head turned slightly, but she did not look up at
Daria. Her fingers continued working the clay ball. “Oh,” she said after a
moment. “The band, because they do covers.”
“Yeah.
I wanted to find out if they write original music, too.”
The
girl snorted lightly. “They do, but be glad they don’t play it. It’s been known
to cause permanent brain damage. Some of the victims have even joined the
band.”
Daria
found the corners of her mouth turning up. “I assume from your shirt that
you’re a fan of theirs?”
“I’m
a fan by default,” said the girl. “The lead singer’s my brother.”
Daria
felt a slight jolt run through her. “Oh,” she said. “Is that a good thing?”
“It’s
good enough. This your first time here?” the girl asked. Her hands stopped
working the clay ball, and her head rose slightly.
“Yes.
I’m Daria. Daria Morgendorffer.”
“Jane
Lane,” said the girl. Her head rose further, and Daria saw the girl smile
warmly through the curtain of her hair. Light flickered from her sunglasses.
“Trent might come out in a few minutes. He and his girlfriend are probably
working out schedules with the manager.”
“No
rush,” said Daria. “I can wait.”
“Well,
I can’t,” said Jane with a sigh. She dropped the clay ball in a jacket pocket
and slid off her stool, standing up with one hand on the wall behind her. “Be
right back. This kid hears nature’s call.”
Daria
nodded and looked away as the girl left. Someone was slowly setting up the
stage at the back of the room, moving large speaker boxes into place against
the wall. She watched until she got bored, then began looking around the room
again, thinking about her paper and the annoying reason she had to write it.
A
large man walked past Daria with an unsteady gait, almost brushing against her.
She turned to follow his progress, thinking he’d probably had too much beer and
was seeking immediate relief. Sure enough, he was heading in the direction Jane
had gone.
Jane
came into view from around a corner then, returning to her place at the bar.
Daria noticed Jane kept one hand out at her side, brushing her fingertips
against the wall as she walked. Daria was thinking that the girl would do
better to just take off her sunglasses when the man and Jane reached each
other. The man staggered into the girl’s path and collided with her. The blow
knocked Jane into the wall. She barely kept herself from falling. The man
continued on around the corner and out of sight.
Electrified
with horror, Daria jumped off her stool and hurried over. Jane stood with her
back and arms pressed to the wall to steady herself. She appeared shaken but
uninjured.
“Are
you all right?” Daria called as she came up.
“Yeah,
but I lost my glasses,” said Jane, her head down and long hair covering her
face. “Who the hell hit me?”
“Some
drunk,” said Daria. She spotted Jane’s sunglasses on the floor. “Wait, I’ll get
them,” she said. “They’re by your feet.”
Daria
retrieved the glasses and stood up at Jane’s side. “Here,” she said, holding
them near Jane’s face.
Jane
reached up with one hand and carefully felt the air for Daria’s arm. Upon
touching it, she moved her hand up until she grasped her glasses by an earpiece
and took them back.
“It’s
really dark in here,” said Daria, about to add that sunglasses weren’t
necessary.
Jane
raised her head. The curtain of long, black hair parted.
The
breath caught in Daria’s throat. She thought of dark brown lava splashed down
over a heart-shaped face, the lava rippled and curdled where it touched the
skin. The lowest part of Jane’s face was mostly intact—her pointed chin, pink
lips, and lower cheeks, except for a dark brown streak down the right side.
Above her lips, however, her face was a patchwork of keloids and skin grafts that
reached to her forehead and above. Her streaked, wrinkled nose was obviously
rebuilt. Her long silky hair shadowed most of the injuries, but hardly all.
Jane
pushed her hair back with her hands to put her sunglasses back on. Daria
watched the dark glasses slide into place over two skin-covered hollows where
eyes were supposed to be, but none were.
Say
something, screamed a voice inside Daria’s head.
“Can
I help you back to your seat?” she whispered.
“Yeah,
thanks,” Jane whispered back, adjusting her hair—a wig, Daria realized, seeing
Jane’s hair move and noting that the skin damage reached above the forehead.
Daria took Jane by the elbow and walked slowly back to the bar with her,
staying close as Jane took her seat in the corner again.
“I’m
okay now,” Jane said once she was comfortable. She kept her head down, her long
black hair once more covering her face and sunglasses. Her hands rested in her
lap. “If you want to talk to Trent and the guys, I can introduce you, if you
can stick around a little longer.”
“It
doesn’t matter,” Daria said. “My paper idea wasn’t all that good, anyway.”
“The
guys do write original music. They might even play a few songs for you, if you
have the stomach for it.”
“Pass.
I was going to ask them how they felt about singing other people’s music and
not their own. It might stir up too much angst, now that I think of it.”
“Suit
yourself,” said Jane. “If Mystik Spiral didn’t have angst, those guys would
have nothing at all, except money on payday.” She suddenly stuck out a hand in
Daria’s direction. “Good meeting you. Thanks again.”
Daria
stared at her hand. “Are you leaving?”
Jane’s
hand wavered, then dropped to her lap again. “No. I thought you were.”
“I
wasn’t going anywhere. Mind if I get my drink and sit with you?”
“Uh
. . .” Jane lifted her head toward Daria, taken aback. “Sure, if you’re not . .
.”
“I
don’t have to leave yet,” said Daria, going back to retrieve her cola. “I told
my parents I’d be out this afternoon doing research. They don’t expect me back
until eight.”
“Great!”
Jane said after a startled beat. She turned her head in the direction of the
bartender. “Fritz?”
“Cola,
Janey?” he said quickly, filling a glass for someone else.
“Please.”
“On
the way.”
“I’ll
pay,” said Daria, reaching into a pocket of her jacket.
“Don’t
worry about it,” said Jane. “I drink for free. It’s one of the perks of having
a brother in a rock band.”
“Cool.
Um, can your parents adopt me so I can get free drinks, too?”
“It
wouldn’t be worth it. Fritz?”
“Janey?”
he called back from the cash register.
“Can
she be good for drinks, too?”
“Sodas
only, like you,” said Fritz. He reached into the cash register, took out a
dollar, and tossed it on the counter by Daria’s arm, then poured Jane a Cola
Blast. “Be back in a sec,” he said, walking over to a new customer.
“Thank
you,” Daria said, putting the money away. “I’m still hoping to be adopted. It
would save me from communicating with my family later when I get home.”
“That’s
where I got lucky,” said Jane. “Except for Trent, everyone else in my family
took off. It’s just the two of us now, most of the time.”
“You
can have my sister.”
“Is
she good for anything?”
“Damn,
you would ask.”
“Pass.”
Jane’s face rose, but she was smiling. “You go to Lawndale High?”
“Yeah.
Tenth grade. It’s not as much fun as the psychiatric nurses said it would be.
You?”
“Home-tutored.
Trent makes enough money to keep me from having to put up with big-mouthed
dopes in crowds. I’m in tenth grade, too, give or take a few classes. I’ve got
several tutors, but one of them’s about to take off for Chicago and get a real
job.” Jane sipped her Cola Blast, then put it down. “Hey, you do okay in
school, right?”
“I
can find my way around a textbook.”
“I
really need a tutor for history, if you don’t mind. I think Trent and Monique
can pay you pretty well.”
“Monique?”
“His
girlfriend. She’s okay, but on the overprotective side. Maybe she’s trying out
for mom status or something—like I really need it.”
“Hmmm.”
Daria reflected. She had tutored a couple of kids back in Highland, the year
before, and she excelled in history. “Sure, I think we can work it out. I have
to check with my alien masters at home, but they’ll probably say yes. They’ve
been trying to get me away from the TV set, anyway.”
“You
can watch me sculpt.”
“You
can listen to me burp up Cola Blast.”
“I
bet I can burp louder than you can.”
“We’ll
get my sister and let her be the judge.”
“You
mean she likes that sort of thing?”
Daria
could not keep from smiling. “No.”
Jane
smiled back. “Deal.”
* * *
They
compared likes and lives for a long time. Jane hoped to become a self-employed
sculptor, though her plans beyond that were vague. “It’s either that or be a
roadie for Spiral for the rest of my life. If I didn’t have to listen to their
music, I could almost stand it, but then they’d probably want me to work, too,
and that would ruin everything. I won’t compromise my standards, even as low as
they are.”
“Not
to change the subject, but what do you like to sculpt?”
“Faces,
definitely. Human faces, but I’m flexible. Don’t analyze the face thing,
please. Everyone else does it, and that drives me mad. I’ve tried making other
things—ashtrays, pencil holders, doggies, garden gnomes, handguns, the usual
kind of stuff—but faces really do it for me. It’s a shame no one likes the way
they come out.”
“Well,
it’s art. What do they know?”
“There,
that’s what I tell them, but they get upset and claim they have only one nose
or two ears, not six or seven. Philistines. They wouldn’t know art if it
knocked on their door drunk at two in the morning and threw up in their living
room.”
“Isn’t
that what art is supposed to do?”
“I
think so. How about you? What do you do?”
“When
it’s not two in the morning, I mostly write stuff. Nothing publishable. I did a
story for English about clones taking over the world and everything turning
into a copy of everything else. It scared my teacher, so he stuck me with the
assignment on originality. It’s due tomorrow.”
“Are
you sure you don’t want to talk to Trent?”
“Nah,
I’ll do it when I get home. I’m going to write about my sister’s worship of
original fashion accessories and cosmetics.”
“Oh,
sorry to hear about that. I didn’t know.”
“Eh,
it’s okay. We keep her locked up, but she crawls out through the ductwork.”
At
some point after five o’clock, Daria and Jane decided that the Zen was becoming
too crowded and loud to be any fun. Jane invited Daria to her house, which
turned out to be not terribly far from Daria’s.
“Fritz?”
Jane shouted above the crowd noise to the bartender, “will you tell Trent and
Monique where I went?”
“Sure,
if I see ‘em!” Fritz called back, trying to fill a dozen drink orders at once.
“Why don’t you stay and help me out behind the counter?”
Jane
just laughed. Daria retrieved Jane’s white cane from behind the bar, and they
took off. Daria held Jane’s left arm in her right, it being too crowded now to
escape the Zen separately. They were almost out the door when out-of-tune
guitar chords crashed through the air, tremendously amplified by the rear bank
of loudspeakers. A ragged cheer went up from the growing crowd.
“Told
you they sucked,” said Jane with satisfaction. “Actually, they do that for
effect. They’re pretty good when they’re doing covers. They do a great Nirvana
tribute.”
“Sure
you don’t want to stay and cheer your brother on?”
“No,
I don’t want to put my earplugs in.”
“Funny.”
“Funny,
nothing. I’ve got four sets of them in my pockets in case I drop some. The
band’s way too loud. If I lose my hearing, I’m really up the creek.”
“Why
do you hang around here, then?”
Jane
shrugged as they walked. “It’s boring at home with no one to make fun of but
me. They’re used to me in the Zen. I’m sort of the band’s mascot. I was
thinking about getting a leather collar, maybe with spikes. Think that would go
with my outfit?”
“Depends
on the spikes.” Daria looked back for a moment at the Zen as they walked down
Dega Street. A thunderstorm of noise poured from the Zen. “I bet the hearing
aid specialists in this town subsidize that place.”
“I’ll
never tell, unless you offer me a thick-crust, six-cheese pizza. Then I’ll turn
state’s evidence on all of ‘em.”
“That
reminds me of a news story I heard once, about a guy who owned a car windshield
shop and went out at night smashing car windshields to drum up business. Maybe Sick, Sad World could . . .” She
stopped.
“No,
go on. I listen to that show on nights when I’m not at the Zen.”
Daria
looked at her new friend. “That’s my favorite show.”
Jane
pulled Daria’s arm closer to her. “The Force is strong in you, young Daria.”
“No,
that’s the Cola Blast. I’m about to burp.”
She
burped, and Jane rated it as a 3.5 on a scale of 1 to 10. They traded stories
about television, tutors, and teachers. Daria bemoaned her inability to escape
from her after-school self-esteem class until it ended in another two weeks,
and Jane complained about her ferocious (but losing) battles with algebra using
special Braille characters. “Tell me one thing that algebra’s good for, one
thing!” she said heatedly.
“Building
bridges.”
“There,
see? It’s totally irrelevant to everything I want to do in life.”
“Hmmm,
I’m unable to contradict the logic of that. We’ll give history a shot anyway,
just to get you past the high-school requirements.”
“That
would be great if you could. All that ancient world crap is Greek to me.”
Daria
gave Jane a sidelong glance. “Bah-dum-boom. Why are we slowing down?”
“Oh,
we’re almost home. I was listening for this dog two houses down from ours. Um,
there it is.” Daria heard a small dog yipping. “We have the two-story light
yellow house on the left, unless someone’s gone and repainted it.”
“The
house with ‘Lane’ written on the mailbox?”
“Sure,
make fun of me now, but wait until I’m eating pizza and you’re not.”
“You
want to order out?”
“I
always order out unless I’m at the Zen. What do you like?”
“Anything
but anchovies. Other than that, I’m good. My treat, okay?”
“I
never take sympathy gifts, never never ever, except this once. Next time,
however, I’ll let you pay for it.”
Daria
did a double take. “Have you ever thought about selling used cars?”
“Hmmm,”
said Jane, appearing to consider this. They reached the front door and stopped.
Daria let go of Jane’s arm as Jane fished in a coat pocket and produced a small
set of keys, selecting one by touch and fitting it into the deadbolt lock and
turning it. She then opened the door and went in, leaning her white cane
against the doorframe. “Make yourself at home.”
“That
normally means I have to lock myself in my room.” Daria stepped in and closed
the door behind her. The house seemed clean and well kept, though the living
room furniture was worn. “Nice place. Does your brother vacuum and dust when
he’s not rocking the house?”
“We
have a maid service, if you can believe that. Monique insisted on it. She’s
paranoid that I’ll fall over something.” Jane felt around until she touched a
wall. Daria noticed that Jane appeared to get her bearings then, and she made
her way to a cordless telephone on a nearby bookcase in moments. Jane thumbed
in a two-digit number and put the phone to her ear, waiting. “You like that new
Trashcan Special that Pizza King has out?” she called to Daria. “I can get it
without the fishies.”
“Haven’t
tried it, but I’m game.” Daria reached down and opened a book on a coffee
table. It was filled with Braille characters, but with regular text written out
below each line. It was a book on Norse mythology. She listened to Jane order
the pizza and soft drinks—“Ultra Cola okay with you?” she called to Daria—then
hang up.
“You
like mythology?” Daria asked.
“What?
Oh, the book. I had to read it for the history tutor before she quit. It was
fun for a change. Gave me lots of ideas for projects. I was thinking of doing
Odin’s face, beard and eye patch and horned helmet.”
“The
Vikings didn’t actually wear horned helmets.”
“Trent
says the ones from Minnesota do. That’s good enough for me.” Jane did not face
Daria directly, appearing to keep her left ear at a 45-degree angle toward her
friend. “Wanna see my studio?”
“You’ve
got a studio for sculpting?”
“Not
really. It’s just my room. Come on up.” Jane tapped the wall behind her with a
hand, then walked unaided off to a stairway leading up. Daria followed, and a
few moments later, Jane opened the door into her bedroom and went in. Daria
started to follow, then realized Jane wasn’t going to turn on the lights. She
flipped the switch by the door, and the room was bathed in illumination.
“Oh,
sorry about that,” said Jane, going to a closet. “Should have thought of that
when I came in. Not one of my habits.”
“No
problem,” said Daria. She looked the room over and thought it was the oddest
thing she ever recalled seeing. It had a barren, almost sterile look, despite
the furniture in it. No posters hung on the nicely painted light blue walls,
and a large round carpet covered the bare wooden floor between the bed and the
doorway. The walls were lined with shelves on which numerous clay models
rested, most of them of human-looking faces and heads. To Daria’s surprise, a
few of the sculptures were painted or glazed in bright colors. A television set
sat on a shelf across from the foot of a queen-size waterbed on the room’s far
side, on which a wadded knot of blankets, sheets, and pillows rested in
comforting chaos. A gigantic stereo system took up the top of the headboard of
the bed; Daria thought it looked like a control panel from the Death Star.
Mystik Spiral had to be doing a fine business playing covers. Originality
obviously wasn’t everything when bills had to be paid.
Along
a wall near Daria was a long worktable, covered with newspapers and sculpting
tools, on which half-finished modeling projects rested in various stages of
completion. All of the projects were of hairless human faces with exaggerated
features. Some of them did indeed have more than one nose and more than two
ears or eyes.
The
room was as clean as the rest of the house, though Jane seemed to be fond of
stacking or dropping odds and ends against the walls, like old underwear,
socks, empty soda cans, and small used boxes of clay, putty, and other modeling
compounds. Clots of modeling compound were stuck everywhere in the carpet, and
odd stains abounded. An abacus leaned against the wall by the bed.
What
was strangest of all, to Daria’s eyes, was that no printed words were visible
except on the boxes of modeling compound or on the newspapers spread out on the
sculpting table. Regular pictures and posters were noticeably missing, too. It
was the kind of room in which it did not matter if the lights were off or on.
After a moment, Daria also noticed that some of the boxes under Jane’s bed had
black label strips on them. She squinted. The characters on the bright plastic
labels were in Braille.
Jane
took off her black leather jacket and tossed it into the doorless closet. A
moderate pile of jackets, t-shirts, boots, and pants already covered the closet
floor. “So, how do you like it?” she asked as she took off her boots standing
up.
“Weird,”
Daria said, “as in good weird. Mind if I look at your work?” Daria stayed by
the door, worried about bumping into Jane if she started walking around.
“Hey,
I’d love it.” She walked unerringly across the room and felt for the back of a
wheeled desk chair at the table. Daria followed and crouched down near her,
putting the sculptures at eye level. She studied them with fascination.
“These
look kind of—” Daria searched for a word “—fairytale-ish. Otherworldly, maybe.
It’s hard to describe.” She reached up to touch one, but changed her mind,
thinking it might still be soft. “They almost look familiar, in a way, like a
distant relative or someone I haven’t seen in a long time.” She looked at Jane.
“Forgive me for asking, but do you paint these, too?”
“Some
of them. Trent or Monique buy the paint or glaze, then I label the bottles and
kind of feel my way around with the brush. If you’re careful, you can tell if
the brush is making contact and go from there. Monique tells me if I’m off so I
can correct something before I fire it. I use my mom’s old kiln out back.”
Daria
shook her head in admiration. “This stuff is incredible.”
Jane
smiled as she sat in her chair, hands in her lap. “Usually people are kind of
put off, I think,” she said. “The tutors and the cleaning people are about the
only ones who come in here, outside of stray family members.” She appeared to
stare at the wall, her left ear in Daria’s direction. “You really like them?”
“Yeah,
I do,” said Daria. The faces did have a strange, supernatural aspect to them,
as if they’d been made using live models hailing from another planet or
dimension. “You say you’ve done garden gnomes?”
Jane
laughed. “I made one for my sister Summer a couple years ago, but her kids
broke it. I don’t think she missed it. She sounded underwhelmed when I gave it
to her.”
Daria
refrained from comment. “I like this one,” she said, staring at another face.
“The one with three eyes.”
“You
do? He’s a favorite of mine, too.”
Daria
was looking at another face when Jane pushed her chair back from the worktable.
Daria turned to look at her. Jane appeared to be waiting or thinking.
“You
haven’t asked,” Jane finally said.
Daria
knew right away what she meant. She settled back on her heels, knees on the
carpet. “I thought you’d mention it eventually, or not. I wanted to get to know
you. I thought that was more important.”
Jane
gave a mirthless smile. “Usually, it’s the other way around. Everyone wants to
know what happened, and after the story’s over, they’re either bored with me or
grossed out. I guess they get their entertainment quota and move on. Some
people want to see the scars.” She exhaled. “Doesn’t matter, either way. Most
of them drop me like a rock right after. No one calls back.” She shrugged.
“Doesn’t matter,” she mumbled.
Daria
waited.
“It
was an accident,” Jane went on after a few seconds. “I was six. My dad was
developing a bunch of film in the kitchen, and he had all these bottles of
photography chemicals on the kitchen table. He used to be a photographer, sold
a lot of nature pictures and exotic scenes to magazines and book publishers.
So, there were all these bottles, and I thought they were sodas or fruit
juice.”
Daria
flinched, fearing what was to come.
“He
went to the bathroom,” Jane continued in a steady voice, “and I remember I
wanted to get the green bottle, because it was closest and it looked like an
Ultra Cola. It was hydrochloric acid.”
“Oh—”
Daria covered her mouth.
“I
reached for it and bumped it, then it fell over and splashed all over me. It
got into my eyes, my hair, everywhere. I don’t remember much after that except
screaming. My face felt like it was on fire, just burning my skin off, and I
couldn’t stop the burning no matter what I did. My parents had to borrow a
neighbor’s car to get me to the hospital. They should have washed the stuff out
of my face and hair first, but they were kind of panicking and not thinking at the
time. I was in for a couple weeks. I don’t remember much of it, or what came
after.” She exhaled. “That’s about it.”
“I’m
sorry,” Daria mumbled after a long pause. “It’s useless to say that, but . . .”
Jane
shrugged. “It was a long time ago. I got past it.” She rubbed her mouth. “So,
you still want to hang around for a while?”
“Hmmm.”
Daria chewed her lower lip, choosing her words. “Do you really listen to Sick, Sad World?”
“If
I’m home, I do.” She gestured behind her at the television set. “Trent says the
picture’s bad, but that’s why I wanted it. Guess it won’t do you any good,
though. I could trade it for the set downstairs, I guess. I never thought
anyone would hang out with—” Jane flinched and gestured as if to wipe away what
she had said. She quietly rotated her seat slightly in one direction, then in
another, and swallowed.
“If
you want to be around me, I have to tell you something else,” Jane said. “Show
you something else, I mean.”
“Okay.”
Daria guessed at what was coming.
One
of Jane’s hands strayed upward to her long black hair. She wound a lock of it
around a finger. “This isn’t real. It’s a wig. When I’m working on stuff in my
room, I take it off. The glasses, too. They get in the way. I only wear them
around other people.” She was quiet for a moment again, then added, “I want you
to see me, the real me, but only if you want to. I couldn’t stand it if you
freaked out on me later and ran off. It’s happened before. Better to do it
now.”
Daria
steeled herself. Her guess had been right. “Okay. I knew it was a wig, anyway.”
Jane
half turned her head toward Daria. “Really? When did you know?”
“When
I gave your sunglasses back to you.”
“Oh.
Then you . . .”
“I
saw you.”
Jane
was quiet at that. She then nodded and took a breath. “You still need to see
the rest of me,” she said. “Here goes.” Her hands reached up. She slowly took
off her sunglasses and carefully laid them on the bed behind her. She then
reached up and pulled her wig off, setting it on the bed as well.
Time
froze. Daria only stared, aghast.
Jane
sat motionless for half a minute, except to turn her head from side to side.
“This is the real me,” she said simply. “I keep my hair cut short in back for
the wig, what little hair I’ve got.”
Daria
started to breathe again. Part of the horror wore off, but only a small part.
“Does it hurt?” she whispered.
“The
skin is sensitive in a few places.” Jane’s hand came up and gently touched
several spots across her head and ruined face. “Some places I can’t feel
anything at all. My hearing’s not so good on my right side.” She turned her
head. “Some of that stuff got on the outside of my ear. I was lucky none of it
got inside my ears or in my mouth. I was lucky none of it got on my hands, too.
I had mittens on at the time because it was cold in the house. I think my
parents forgot to pay the heating bill or something. It happened in a
February.”
Daria
took a deep, ragged breath, recovering. Seeing Jane’s face earlier had prepared
her, though only a little, for the shock of the full view.
“You
okay?” Jane asked.
“I’m
okay.” Daria inhaled slowly, then said the first thing that came into her mind.
“This wasn’t part of a plot you had to scare me away so you could take the
pizza for yourself, was it?”
Jane
gave a nervous smile. “It didn’t work?” she asked with faux innocence. “Damn.”
“After
living with my family all these years, I’m kind of immune to a lot of things.”
Daria swallowed. “And, no one has yet dragged me away from a Pizza King dinner,
even if I paid for it.”
“You
must be crazier than your family is.” Jane reached for the bed and felt for her
wig and glasses. “I’m sorry now that I did this to you. Maybe I needed to do it
more than you needed to see it.”
“It’s
okay. I think it was good that you did it, but don’t ask me why.”
Jane
put the wig on again and straightened the fit. “You know, if you ever tell me
that you have nightmares about this, then—”
“No,”
said Daria flatly. “I won’t. I’m booked solid for decades with nightmares about
my own family, especially my sister.” She looked around the room. “New topic?”
“Okay,”
said Jane in relief. “Did you catch that Sick,
Sad World episode last week about England’s royal family being robots
controlled by alien invaders?”
The
evening passed far too quickly. Jane walked Daria to the door when the pizza
was gone and it was time to go. “Thanks for coming by,” she said. “I feel the
creative muse poking me in the back. I’m going to work on something for a
while. Something with three noses, I think.”
“You
should make an extra-large clay handkerchief to go with it,” Daria said. She
turned to go—then turned around again. She reached in an inner pocket of her
jacket and produced a pen and notepad. “I need your phone number.”
Jane
gave it and added, “I need yours, too. Wait here.” She went back upstairs and
returned a minute later with a handheld label printer. She quickly printed out
a strip in Braille as Daria gave her home phone number, then stuck the strip in
her pants pocket. “Thanks, amiga.”
“And
thanks back. I’ll check on the tutoring thing tonight. Call you tomorrow after
classes?”
“Sure.
Mrs. Foster leaves at three, so anytime after that is fine. It’ll save me from
spending time at the Zen. I lose too many earplugs there.”
* * *
Daria
opened the door to her family’s new home just before 8 p.m. She hoped she could
get to her room unnoticed, but Quinn spotted her right off, sitting in the
living room watching a fashion show on the TV. “Muuh-OOOM!” she yelled, her
gaze returning to the screen, “Daria’s home!”
“Come
on in the kitchen, dear!” called their mother from another room. “Tell us about
your evening!”
Daria
groaned and walked toward the kitchen. As she passed Quinn on the couch,
however, she stopped and gasped, looking at a spot on the couch near her
sister’s left shoulder. She leaned closer for a better look, her movements
followed by Quinn’s suspicious gaze.
“What?”
said Quinn. She turned to look at the couch, leaning away from it.
“Nothing,”
said Daria with a sigh. “It’s gone now.” She walked on into the kitchen,
hearing Quinn jump to her feet behind her and move to another chair. Daria
smiled in triumph.
“Tell
me about your evening out, sweetie!” Helen Morgendorffer called from the
kitchen table. She was surrounded by a pile of legal paperwork from her new job
at a firm specializing in corporate law. Daria’s father, Jake, sat across from
her, engrossed in the business section of the evening newspaper.
“It
was okay,” said Daria, mulling over what had happened. “I went to the Zen, had
a soft drink, met a friend, came home, and now—”
“A
friend?” Helen said. A startled look crossed her face, and her mouth fell open.
“You found a friend?”
Warning!
shrieked every neuron in Daria’s brain. “Uh, yeah. She—”
“Jake!
Jake, listen!” Helen snapped her fingers at her husband. “Daria found a friend!”
“Mom,”
said Daria, reddening, “it’s not like I—”
“A
friend?” Stunned, Jake lowered his paper to stare at his oldest daughter. “This
is a joke, right?”
“Jake!” yelled Helen.
“I
mean, that’s great, kiddo! I’m proud of you!” His expression grew anxious. “He
doesn’t ride a motorcycle and wear a chain for a belt, does he?”
“Jake!”
“Helen,
damn it, I have to ask!”
“It’s
a girl, Jake! Daria’s friend is a girl!”
“Daria
has a friend?” Quinn screamed from the living room. “She’s not going to
bring her over, is she? God, I’ll be ruined if my friends see them here!”
“Quinn!”
yelled Helen. “Of course she can bring her friend over! We’ll all get to
meet her! Ask her over for dinner, and I’ll make lasagna!”
“Mom,
be reasonable!” Quinn screamed from the other room. “My popularity can only
take so much!”
“Kiddo,
listen—your friend’s not into drugs or mail bombs, is she?”
“JAKE!”
“If
anyone needs me,” Daria said as she walked out of the kitchen, “I’ll be eating
lye in my room.”
Daria
was halfway up the stairs, mortified beyond words, when she heard her mother at
the bottom of the steps. “Daria!” she called. “Your birthday’s next week.
Invite her over for that! I’ll look in the stores for a special party lasagna!”
Daria
shut and locked her door, then walked over to her bed. She took off her glasses
and lay face down on the covers, her arms around her head. She lay like that
for twenty minutes in complete silence.
“Birthday
party,” she said at the end of the twenty minutes. It was possible. It would be
the first time in memory that she would have a friend over for a birthday
party. Little chance existed of selling Quinn to the Gypsies beforehand, but
you took the bad with the good.
She
would ask Jane to the party.
If
Jane said yes, it was time to talk to the family about her.
* * *
The
following afternoon, Daria went to her room after school and took the portable
phone with her. After making sure that Quinn was not on the line, she dialed
Jane’s number and waited.
The
phone picked up after two rings. “Hello?” came Jane’s voice. “Trent?”
“We’re
sorry, but that was not the right answer for today’s $25,000 question. We’ll
try back next decade.”
“Hey, amiga!
What’s up?”
“Classes
over for the day?”
“Yeah,
a half hour ago. What did your folks say about your tutoring here?”
“Um,
we kinda got sidetracked last night. I won’t say that weapons of mass
destruction were used, but I won’t say they weren’t, either.”
“Oh.
This wasn’t about me, was it?”
“No.
It was about my family being . . . my family. Listen, are you, uh, doing
anything next week, on the twenty-first?”
“Wait,
let me check my calendar. Hmmm, no, I guess not. Why?”
“I
have this thing, a birthday you could call it, and I was wondering if—”
“Your
birthday’s next week? Wait, this isn’t some kind of plot to get your money back
from buying pizza last night, is it?”
“I
deny all allegations. Anyway—”
“How
old?”
“Uh,
sixteen.”
“I’m
older than you? Thank God, finally I have someone to pick on.”
“Oh,
you wish. Anyway, if you’d want, I’d like to have you come over.”
“Ah,
ha! I knew this was a trick to get your money back! Okay, what
size flamethrower do you want?”
“I’m
a size six, according to Quinn. So . . . you’ll come over?”
Daria
heard Jane sigh on the other end of the line. “I . . . I really appreciate the
offer, but I have to tell you I don’t do well in big groups. Too much like
being in the middle ring of the circus, I guess. I will get you a flamethrower,
though, as soon as they go on sale. Trent can bring it over.”
“Except
for me and certain individuals who claim to be genetically related to me, there
won’t be a crowd. It’s possible my sister won’t even be there. On the other
hand, my mom wants to make lasagna, and—”
“Lasagna?
Daria, why didn’t you say so? What time’s the party?”
Daria
blinked. “You’re kidding about the lasagna, right?”
“Kidding?
I love lasagna! Trent and Monique don’t cook, so I never get it. They
almost always get takeout Chinese.”
“Well,
my mother doesn’t really cook, either. She buys lasagna frozen in bulk and lets
Reddy Kilowatt do the rest.”
“Hey,
I’m your friend, so I can’t be too picky. I’m on it. Can I be there
right after my tutors leave?”
“You
understand you might have to meet my parents, right?”
“As
long as there’s only two of them, I think I can handle it. Um, your sister
won’t be in?”
“Probably
not. She mentioned a desperate need to date the football team that night. It
had nothing to do with you. It was just the idea that she might have to meet
someone who hung around me, and that could damage her popularity rating with
the student body.”
“Huh,”
said Jane, her light tone changing. “That kind of explains why none of my older
sibs except Trent ever wanted me around when their friends were over. Too
creepy for them, I guess.”
Daria
found her ability to banter suddenly strained. She went in a new direction. “We
might have cake, too, but no promises that it will be edible, unless I buy it.
You have a flavor preference?”
“Well,
it’s your birthday, but if I had to choose, I’d choose ‘lots.’ That’s my only
cake preference. Make sure there’s lots.”
“Done.
Doing anything now?”
“Sculpting,
but company is welcome. Bring some homework and sit around.” Jane hesitated.
“If you want.”
Daria
checked her bedside clock. “I’ll kick on your front door in fifteen minutes.”
The
relief in Jane’s voice was unmistakable. “Great! I’ll be here!”
“Over
and out.”
“Over
and out.”
Daria
laid the phone on her bed and thought. After she got home again, it would be
time to talk with the family. Dinner was the only time to catch them in one
place, so it would have to be then.
* * *
Daria
waited until everyone was seated and reaching for the food. “I have something
to tell you,” she said.
“Preg-nant,”
said Quinn in a low, singsong voice.
“What?”
shouted Jake at Daria. “You’re what?”
“Jake!”
yelled Helen. “Let her talk!”
Daria
glared at Quinn, who smiled to herself as she spooned a small amount of lasagna
onto her plate. “It’s about my friend,” Daria said.
“She’s
pregnant?” Jake asked.
“No,”
said Daria, wondering if she could empty all of the lasagna onto her sister if
she moved quickly enough. “I’d like for her to come to my birthday party.”
“That’s
wonderful!” Helen said, looking daggers at Jake and Quinn. “We’d love to
meet her!”
“I’ll
be over at Sandi’s,” said Quinn.
“No,
you won’t, young lady!” said Helen. “You’ll stay here and celebrate Daria’s
birthday if it kills you!”
“Is
that a promise?” Daria asked.
“Muuh-OOM!”
“Quinn
Louise Morgendorffer, don’t you start—”
“Actually,”
Daria put in, “I wouldn’t mind if Quinn didn’t want to stay. No need to make
her watch everyone else eat birthday cake and get fat.”
Quinn
gave her sister a strange look, momentarily at a loss for words.
“Daria,”
said Helen, “don’t you want your sister to be here for your birthday?”
Daria
took a breath. “It’s about my friend. She doesn’t like big crowds. And there
are some other things I have to tell you about her.”
“It’s
bad enough that she’s your friend, isn’t it?” said Quinn.
“Quinn,”
said Helen in a warning tone.
“She’s
not pregnant, right?” asked Jake.
Everyone
turned to look at him. He cleared his throat, comprehension dawning. “I think
I’ll just eat now,” he said, and he put a forkful of lasagna in his mouth.
“Daria,
what is it you wanted to tell us?” Helen said, with a last look at Jake.
“Um
. . . she’s blind.”
Everyone
looked at Daria.
“Blind?” said Helen.
Quinn
opened her mouth to speak.
Daria’s
gaze went in her direction. “Careful,” said Daria in a tone that Quinn knew
well.
Quinn
slowly closed her mouth.
“There’s
more,” said Daria, wanting to get this over with.
“Enough.”
Quinn held up both hands. “I won’t be here. You can have your party in peace
and quiet, and I will do the same at Sandi’s.”
“I
appreciate that, but I need to talk to Mom and Dad about this.”
“Go
on, Daria,” said her mother. There was an odd note in her voice.
With
a final glance at Quinn, Daria spoke. “She was blinded when she was six. It was
in an accident.” She sorted through what to say next, finding no good and
tactful way to put it. “A bottle of photography acid spilled in her face, and—”
Quinn
stood up, knocking her chair over. “Sorry!” she gasped, and she fled the table
as quickly as she could.
“Quinn!”
called Helen, standing up. “Quinn!”
“It’s
okay, Mom,” said Daria. “Let her go.” Quinn was not likely putting on an act.
Any mention of disfigurement frightened her, particularly if it involved the
face. Daria winced, wishing she had remembered that before speaking. Why am
I sorry about that, though? she wondered in surprise. Don’t I like tormenting Quinn?
Helen
sat down again. “I’m so disappointed in her,” she said in an angry tone.
“Mom,
it’s okay. I have to finish.”
Helen’s
expression relaxed as she looked at Daria. “You said she had an accident with
chemicals,” she repeated.
Daria
nodded. “It scarred her badly. I wanted to warn you before you see her. She
wears dark glasses and a wig. Just . . . don’t do anything that . . .”
“We
won’t,” said Helen. She looked at Jake, who sat motionless, staring at his
plate. “How did you meet her?”
“She
was at the Zen. Her brother’s in a rock band that plays there.”
Helen
sighed, her gaze wandering down to the steaming lasagna. “Is there anything
else you wanted to tell us about her?”
Daria
looked at the lasagna, too. “She has the weirdest tastes in food,” she said.
* * *
Helen
and Jake approved Daria’s tutoring idea, with the stipulation that Daria
produce a lesson plan and follow it as a real teacher would. Daria made a
mental note to talk with her history teacher, Mr. DeMartino, who was on the
strange side but appeared to take his job seriously. She could use good advice
from an expert, even a strange one.
“We’re
good to go,” Daria told Jane that night by phone. “Give me until next Monday to
cook up some things for you to study. I should find out where they sell Braille
books around here, too.”
“They
don’t,” said Jane. “You have to order them. We’ve got loads of addresses,
though, so don’t sweat it. Some of them you can get online, too.”
“Oh,”
said Daria, looking at her computer. “Good point. I’ll—”
Someone
knocked on Daria’s bedroom door.
“I’m
on the phone!” she called, moving the portable phone away for a moment. “That’s
about it. I’ll call back if anything else develops.”
“Sounds
good,” said Jane. “I’m feeling inspired tonight. Something with lots of ears
will do it, I think.”
“You
go, girl,” Daria said in a deadpan voice. “Later.”
“You
betcha.”
Daria
clicked the phone off. “Come in, if you have to,” she called to the door.
After
a beat, the doorknob turned and the door swung open. Quinn looked in.
“You
have a moment?” she asked.
“I
might.”
Quinn
stepped into the room, then pushed the door shut behind her. She leaned back
against the door, staring at her sister with a narrow look. To Daria’s
surprise, Quinn’s face was red and her eyes were bloodshot.
“I
have to know one thing,” Quinn said, her voice hoarse.
“What?”
“I
want to know,” she said, “if you said that—that—what you said at dinner, that
thing, just to get back at me.”
Oh,
thought Daria, I didn’t think of that. Her urge to tease Quinn
evaporated. This just wasn’t the time. “No. She really is my friend. And she is
blind. That is the truth.”
“Th-that
other p-part,” Quinn said, looking away. Her face was white, and she struggled
to get the words out. “The p-p-part about th-the ch-ch-ch-chem—”
“Yes.”
Quinn
closed her eyes and covered her face with her hands. She leaned against the
door and breathed in and out through her nose. She made an odd noise that Daria
could not identify. When she could, Quinn whispered, “Why do you like her?”
Daria
took time to think about it, disturbed by Quinn’s reaction. “She’s funny. She’s
creative, and smart, and she likes a lot of the same things I do.” She thought
a little more. “She’s real. She’s exactly who she says she is. She doesn’t
pretend to be something else.” She stopped there, waiting for her sister’s
response.
“Okay,”
said Quinn. She dropped her hands, turned, and quickly left the room, pulling
the door shut behind her.
Daria
stared after her sister. For a moment, Daria thought she had seen tears on
Quinn’s face. That wouldn’t have been like her, though. A trick of the light
seemed more likely. Daria shrugged and got off her bed, walking to her
computer. It was time to check the Internet for textbooks in Braille.
* * *
Daria’s
birthday came quickly. By that point, Daria had begun working with Jane on
world history, borrowing extensively from Mr. DeMartino’s own class notes and a
parade of books in Braille that Daria found on the Internet. Three days before
her birthday, Daria met with Trent, who offered her a startlingly generous
salary for working with Jane in the evenings. She took the offer on the spot.
To her embarrassment, she also developed a major-league crush on the tattooed,
twenty-one-year-old Trent, a situation made worse by the presence of Trent’s
beautiful girlfriend, Monique.
“Don’t
sweat it,” Jane told her later. “One day Monique will be a hag, and he’ll be
all yours.”
“I
don’t know what you’re talking about,” said Daria, her face as red as it could
get. “You should stop doing so many drugs. You’re getting delusional.”
“You
breathe funny when he’s around. You do this quick little gaspy thing that
sounds like you’re—”
“You’re
going to memorize the names of all the Roman emperors tomorrow unless you drop
this now.”
“And
you talk funny, too, like you’ve got this horrible—”
“And
the names of every Roman senator and general, I swear it.”
Jane
could not stop grinning. “Hey, just trying to help.”
Trent
brought Jane to the Morgendorffers’ on the birthday night. Quinn was gone, as
she said she would be. Daria felt a twinge of regret at that, and she was
surprised at herself. Hadn’t she hoped for years that Quinn would just
disappear and stop spoiling her birthday parties? Still, she felt a sense of
loss that her sister wasn’t there to share it with her and Jane.
Daria
walked to Trent’s van and came back with Jane. Jane wore a jeans skirt with a
bright blue t-shirt and her usual black jacket and boots. Her white cane was in
her right hand.
“Hi,
Jane!” Helen cried. She caught herself waving and quickly dropped her hand.
“Glad you could make it!”
“Me,
too,” said Jane. “You made lasagna, right?”
“As
much as you want!” Jane was almost at the door when Helen caught a glimpse of
the face hiding behind the coal-black hair. She lost her smile, but just as
quickly forced it back into action. “This way!”
The
evening went surprisingly well, from Daria’s viewpoint. Jane was animated and
cheerful, almost as eager to talk with Daria’s parents as she was with Daria,
which Daria found disconcerting. It seemed clear that despite Jane’s hanging
around at the Zen, she did not get out much. Helen and Jake did not severely
embarrass themselves, though Helen apologized too often for Quinn’s absence,
and Daria gritted her teeth and looked at the ceiling when her nervous father
told Jane, “You should see how good those glasses look on you!”
Talk
was put off when dinner was ready. Jane pulled her hair back to eat, and Helen
and Jake kept their eyes on their plates while Daria and her friend chatted away.
“You
know,” said Jane, “what I always wanted for my birthdays when I was a kid was
lipstick. My sisters wouldn’t show me how to put it on.”
“Lipstick,”
repeated Daria, raising an eyebrow. “You’re scaring me.”
“No,
seriously. Bright red lipstick and fingernail polish, like Summer and Penny
used. It was all I could think about in first grade I wanted to be grown up so
much.” She smacked her lips as she scraped her fork across her plate several
times, meeting no resistance. “Can I have more lasagna, please?”
“Certainly,”
said Helen. She could not look up. “Daria, would you . . .?”
“If
I must.”
“Just
pile it on,” said Jane. “This stuff is great.”
“Now
you really are scaring me,” said Daria, reaching for the serving spoon.
“Daria,”
murmured her mother in a friendly tone of warning. Helen almost looked up. “Any
chance your parents will want to drop by and visit, Jane?”
“Probably
not right away. My mom’s in Ireland, learning how to build a better kiln. She
should be back before Christmas, I think. I’ll send her over ASAP.”
“And
your father?”
Jane’s
animation faded. “Uh, I don’t know where he is. He, uh, sort of left, after the
accident. He wasn’t very comfortable around me, because of . . . everything, I
guess, and he blamed himself a lot for it. One day, he just . . .” She made a
gesture with her hands of something flying away into the air. “Haven’t heard
from him in a long time. Oh, well.” She dug into her lasagna.
Helen
glanced at Daria, then poked at her food.
“Presents,”
said Daria. “In case anyone forgot, we’re gathered here so that I can get
presents.”
“No,”
said Jane. “We’re here so I can get lasagna.”
“That’s
it, Lane. I’m having you committed first thing in the morning.”
“Do
they serve lasagna at asylums? If you could call ahead and check for me, that
would be great.”
Daria
rolled her eyes.
“You
know,” said Jane, poking her fork in Daria’s general direction, “it just
occurred to me why you’re so good at history.”
“Me?”
“No,
I meant the people hiding behind you. You were born the day before the
anniversary of when that guy Kennedy was shot, um—”
“November
twenty-second, nineteen sixty-three,” said Jake and Helen in unison. They
looked at each other in surprise.
“Uh,
yeah,” said Jane, “but twenty-some years later. You think that’s what got your
history jones going?”
“You
may be right,” said Daria. “The assassination’s fascinated me for quite a
while. I’ve read a lot about it. There was this one book that said that the
Mafia hired these Soviet sharpshooters to—”
“Cake,
anyone?” Helen interrupted brightly.
Jane
waved a hand over her head. “Here, please! Guests first!”
“I’ll
fill you in on the various conspiracies later,” Daria said, accepting defeat.
“Weren’t
all the assassins clones of each other, like that Sick, Sad World episode said last month?” Jane asked.
“They
were?” Jake said, startled.
“Jake?”
Helen broke in, getting up from the table. “Jake, dear, come help me with the
cake in the other room, please.”
“Oh—sure!
Excuse me, girls!”
After
he left, Jane leaned over toward Daria. “I said ‘lots,’ right?”
“What?”
“The
cake! Lots of, right?”
“Yes,
your input was passed along to the proper authorities. You’ll get a formal
response in six to ten working days.”
“Monique
won’t let me have cake. Cavities. Like she knows anything about
dentistry.”
Daria
shook her head. “I thought my parents were bad.”
“Trade
you Monique for your mom and dad.”
Daria
did not dignify the offer with a reply.
“Happy
birthday, sweet sixteen!” shouted Helen and Jake, marching in with Daria’s cake
illuminated.
“And
no Quinn to blow out the candles for me,” said Daria—and promptly felt that
twinge of regret, redoubled.
Jake,
Helen, and Jane sang the birthday song, and Daria inhaled loudly.
At
the same moment, Jane inhaled, too, and leaned forward pretending to blow the
candles out. This caused Daria to panic and blow them all out in one second
flat.
Jane
smiled sweetly afterward. “Quinn wasn’t here,” she said, “so I thought—”
“Wait
till tomorrow’s lesson,” Daria murmured. “I weep for your brain.”
Jake
retrieved a stack of presents from a back room, time was spent opening and
commenting on them, and Daria admitted to herself that her sixteenth birthday
had worked out well indeed.
“My
turn!” said Jane, turning in Helen’s direction. “Do you have it?”
“Right
here, dear. Trent brought it by earlier.” Helen picked up a box wrapped in
silver foil and carefully handed it to Daria. It weighed several pounds, she
discovered.
Inside
the heavily padded box was a fired clay sculpture of a woman’s head, her
expression lively and smiling. She had a heart-shaped face, blue eyes, black
bangs, and bright red lips.
“It’s
me,” said Jane. “It’s . . . it’s what I imagine sometimes I might have looked
like. I thought you would like it.”
Daria
fought to get out any words at all. “I would comment on it if I could see it
better,” she said, wiping her eyes. “Thank you.”
Helen
cleared her throat after an appropriate pause for Daria to return to her normal
sarcastic self. “Two more presents, dear,” she said to Daria. She picked an
envelope from her lap and handed it to her oldest daughter. “From Quinn.”
“Here
in spirit,” said Daria, and opened the envelope. “Hey,” she said in surprise,
“it’s a gift certificate for Books by the Ton. That was . . . unexpected. I’ll
have to stop tormenting her for a day or two.”
“And,”
said Helen in a softer tone, “one for you, Jane.”
Daria
looked up. “What?”
“What?”
echoed Jane. “Me?” She put out a hand, and Helen gave her another envelope.
Daria
felt an uncomfortable tweak deep inside her. “She got a present for Jane?”
“Yes,”
said Helen. “She bought them with her own money at the mall in town.”
Jane
felt the envelope, then handed it to Daria. “Would you open it for me?”
Daria
took the envelope. Was this a trick? It didn’t seem like something Quinn would
do. She ran her thumbnail under the flap and opened it, pulling out a brightly
colored card. She read it in silence.
“It’s
a gift certificate from an art store at the mall,” said Daria quietly. “Thirty
dollars worth, just like mine.”
“Oh,”
said Helen.
“She
what?” asked Jane. “She got me that?”
Daria
stared at Jane, then handed the envelope back. “Here,” she said.
Jane
reached out and Daria put it in her hand. “She got this for me?” Jane said.
“May
I see that?” asked Helen. Jane held the card out, and Helen took it. She
flipped the card over. “She wrote something on the back.” She read it, then
quoted, “‘To Daria’s friend, Jane. I’m sorry I wasn’t here. Maybe one day I can
meet you and see for myself why Daria thinks the world of you. Make something
pretty with whatever art things you get. All the best, Quinn.’” Helen blinked
and swallowed.
Jane
kept her face turned toward Helen. “Why couldn’t she come?” she asked.
“She
was afraid,” said Daria in a monotone, breaking the silence. It was hard to
talk around the lump in her throat. “I told her what happened to you, and she
cried when she heard it. It frightened her, and I think she was afraid she’d
cry if she was here and saw you.”
Helen picked up her napkin and dabbed at her eyes. “Excuse me!” she said, her voice breaking. She put the gift card back into Jane’s hand, then got up from her chair and hurried out of the kitchen, clutching the napkin. Jake followed, calling her name.
Daria
stared at her lap. “I never thought she would do something as nice as that. I
never imagined that she would, I said all those bad things about her to you,
and now I’m ashamed. I should have gotten something for you, too.”
“You
did,” said Jane. “You did. More than you know.” She tilted her head down as if
looking at the card in her hands. “Your sister is lucky. She has you, of
course, but Quinn can do something that I can’t, and I wish more than anything
that I could.”
Daria
grimaced. “She can see, you mean,” she whispered.
“No,”
said Jane. She took off her sunglasses and lifted her head. “She can cry.”
Original: 05/01/03, modified 06/17/06, 09/22/06, 10/02/06, 11/06/07, 10/31/08
FINIS