Disclaimer: Daria and all related characters are the property of MTV and Viacom productions.

Note: This story is the next in the submariner series and as the stories that preceded it, it proceeds under the premise that whatever was feared to go wrong at the onset of Y2K... did.

Note: This story takes place two years after "Reflections Before Summer"



The Old and the New
By
Wildgoose



(The house bustled with activity early this morning as Daria was preparing to leave on a weekend trip to Washington D.C. Trent was busy attempting to lug Daria's suitcase out to the car... the way he carried it one would think it weighed a ton and a half. Finally Daria came walking briskly past him grabbing the suitcase as she did so and carried it out to the car with little effort at all. Jane laughed from her seat on the couch in front of the coffee table just before going back to working on her college studies.)

Jane: I guess somebody needs to get into better shape... huh?

Trent: (looks back at his daughter with a sheepish grin) Maybe I'm iron deficient or something... what do you think?

Jane: I think you just need to exercise, dad.

Trent: (smirks) Didn't you know? Old people are supposed to be like this... why else would their children have invented nursing homes?

Jane: Because kids get tired of seeing their parents kill themselves trying to do everyday tasks. (Beat) Of coarse there wouldn't be a need for such homes if parents would take after mom and aunt Jane's example and keep themselves in shape.

Trent: (plops himself down beside Jane on the couch) Yea well... your mom and aunt Jane had the benefit of boot camp to get them there in the first place. Once you're there... staying that way is probably a whole lot easier.

Jane: You may have a point... but you should probably give it a shot anyway. Try running with aunt Jane and I in the morning... it does wonders for the body.

Trent: (Laughs) You found the time to pull your nose out of a book to go running with your aunt?

Jane: Sure... I mean I would have gone with William too but you know how much of a couch potato he is.

Trent: (laughs) I wonder what side of the family he got THAT from? (Daria is heard walking back in from outside)

Daria: Hey... I thought you guys were supposed to be helping me this morning.

Jane: You've got one suitcase there mom... how much help could you possibly need? I mean you've never been one to travel heavily. (Amy comes walking into the room carrying a bag of Doritos)

Amy: (As she munches on her chips) Who's traveling...?

Jane: Geez... aren't you awake yet? Mom's leaving for D.C. this morning.

Amy: Oh is that why you've been running up and down the stairs... I thought she was doing some weekend cleaning and I didn't want to come out of my room for fear that she would want volunteers.

Daria: (scowls) It's nice to know I could have depended on you should you have been needed.

Amy: No sweat... that's what kids are here for right?

Daria: I'll keep that in mind for next weekend... I'm sure I can find all sorts of things you can help around the house with.

Jane: (laughs) You just screwed yourself, ..sis.

Daria: (turns her attention to Jane) You can help her out since it's so funny. (Amy snickers) But as long as next weekend hasn't come yet... what are the two of you up to THIS weekend? Since I won't be around to badger you both that is.

Jane: Not a whole lot... I'll probably hang around with Allen when I'm not trying to keep dad from burning down the house.

Daria: (smirks) Do you think it would help if I just started buying microwave dinners?

Amy: As long as it isn't lasagna... grandma Morgendorffer used to stuff us with that crap every time we went over for a visit. It's safe to say we'd puke it up if we ever had it again.

Daria: (smirks) So noted.

Jane: Besides... what makes you think dad won't be able to burn the house down with a microwave? He's been known to forget to remove the metal tops from those containers you know.

Trent: (scowls) Hey... I always remember to remove the tops.

Daria: Not on the last microwave we had you didn't. (Amy and Jane begin to snicker)

Trent: Ah... that thing was defective.

Daria: Funny... defective things usually don't wait until three years after you buy them to become faulty. (Daria smiles as she knows Trent can't reply to this and as such she switches the subject by diverting her attention to back to Jane) So you're hanging out with Allen... you've been together for a good while now haven't you?

Jane: About two years... why?

Amy: (with a mouthful of Dorito's) Have you screwed him yet? (Everyone pauses to gawk at Amy's awkward comment and then suddenly turn to Jane awaiting the response)

Jane: (looks back and forth between everyone) What... you can't possibly think... we are NOT having sex!! For god's sake I thought you trusted me enough to ignore such comments from my troublesome sibling.

Daria: Just checking that's all... I always claimed I didn't have hormones too until I came face to face with them in a fall out shelter.

Jane: Note to self... avoid fall out shelters in order to retain virginity. (Trent snickers)

Trent: Don't worry love, I'll keep an eye on her for you. In fact I can see to it that they spend their time together over here... we can rent a movie or something. (Jane just rolls her eyes in embarrassment)

Daria: (turn to Amy) So what about you... what are YOU going to do to keep yourself busy this weekend while I'm gone?

Amy: Not too much I guess... the guys at school mentioned something about a charter boat tomorrow. Maybe I'll try my hand at salt water fishing... at the very least I'll get to enjoy the ocean for a bit. I've never seen the sea from that far out.

Daria: Believe me... when you're that far out it all looks the same.

Amy: This from a person who spent most of her tour of duty in a boat with no windows?

Daria: I wasn't always stuck on a sub you know... I saw my share of the action on the surface.

Amy: Cool... maybe you could let us in on it sometime. All we've ever heard were the sub stories.

Trent: (Shakes his head to Daria) Not everything is meant for such young ears.

Daria: (looks slightly saddened) And not everything is meant to be shared period. (Sighs) Well... whatever you all end up doing I hope you have fun. I'll give you a call when I get to Jodie's. (Everyone says their goodby's and Trent escorts Daria to the car before she leaves for the airport.)

Jane: (As she watches from the bay window as her father kisses Daria goodbye before she gets into the car) So why isn't dad going with her?

Amy: Come on... we're teenagers. Would YOU leave us home alone?

Jane: Are you so sure dad can actually count as adult supervision? He can be more of a hazard then we can.

Amy: True... but you've got to give the guy some credit. His heart is always in the right place... besides Jodie is mom's friend. She and dad probably wouldn't have anything in common.

Jane: (Sighs) I guess. (Beat) So anyway... why the sudden urge to go deep sea fishing?

Amy: There's no urge involved... John mentioned something about it at school that he and the guys were thinking about going as sort of a day trip and they asked if I wanted to come. All we ever seem to catch off the dock in the back of the house is blue claw crabs and maybe an occasional eel. Maybe I'll be able to catch something decent for once.

Jane: It's a saltwater marsh leading into the bay for gods sake... what did you expect to catch in a small tidal waterway? And dad doesn't exactly let us take the boat out on our own that often.

Amy: All the more reason to head out on a charter.

Jane: (shrugs) True. I guess I didn't make for much of an argument this time around, ..huh?

Amy: Everybody has their dog days... you'll do better next time. (Beat) So now that mom and dad are outside... tell me the REAL story. What's the deal with you and Allen?

Jane: There IS no deal... we haven't done anything.

Amy: Two years together and you still haven't done anything? Give me a break Jane... you try to watch the playgirl channel on cable whenever you can hack into the cable company's computer system. You CAN'T give me that crap about having your hormones under control. First, second, third... just give me a hint here. You KNOW I'll cover your six.

Jane: (Blushes slightly and then mumbles) Third. (Amy smirks and the gives Jane a high five)

Amy: You've got to give me the dirt later. (Peers out the bay window) But for now hold that thought... dad's on his way back in. (Trent comes back into the house through the front door) So dad... how long do you figure it'll take mom to get to D.C. once her plane leaves?

Trent: (thinks for a moment) Not too long... about an hour or so if there are no delays. We can give her a call around about when she should have landed to make sure everything is cool.

Jane: Yea I guess so. (Closes her books) Well... that's about enough studying for today I think. I guess I'll go see if Allen's up for a little baseball. (Jane gets up off the couch and heads into the next room to look for the cordless phone.)

Trent: (Raises an eyebrow in interest and then looks over at Amy) Since when did your sister ever take up interest in sports?

Amy: (shrugs) Oh you know us teenagers... our interests change from one day to the next.

Trent: That's for sure... you'll have to clue me in to what she's interested in sometime. Maybe she'll want to play a little ball with her old man.

Amy: (Under her breath) I think that would count as incest, dad. (Out loud) Um... yea, no problem. (Beat) Listen... I'm going to go into the garage and jam on the drums for a bit if that's okay.

Trent: (shakes his head) Man... it's a good thing I had that garage soundproofed this past spring. The neighbors were starting to eye up a good tree to hang us all from.

Amy: Ah... they just don't appreciate talent when they hear it... that's all. (Turns and heads in the direction of the garage)

Trent: Oh they appreciate talent... just not when it causes things in their own homes to vibrate due to the base emanating from OUR house. (Trent leans back onto the couch and uses the remote to flick on the Tv)

(Cut to a few hours later. Daria can be seen getting settled into a motel room somewhere in Washington D.C... after a moment her cell phone rings and Daria picks up to find her husband Trent on the other end)

Daria: I was wondering when the hell you were going to call... I would have figured you to call as soon as you thought I would be on the ground again. What happened... did the kids miscalculate or something?

Trent: (Laughs) No... actually they're both off doing their own thing right now. Jane's out with Allen again... and the sub model above the fireplace is still vibrating slightly which means Amy is still on the drums in the garage.

Daria: The sound proofing is helping then?

Trent: Oh yea... bunches. I can actually hear myself think now.

Daria: As opposed to years ago when you would sit down in the basement thinking NOTHING and hoping inspiration would pop into your head?

Trent: Hey... inspiration scares easily. I didn't want to frighten it away with all the other jumbled thoughts in my head.

Daria: (decides to get to the point on her mind) So what are Jane and Allen really up to?

Trent: Jane mentioned that they were going to play baseball.

Daria: (frowns) She still uses that old line, huh? Did you search her room after Amy went into the garage?

Trent: Yea... no sign of any incriminating paraphernalia. I don't think they've let their relationship proceed that far just yet. But I've got my eye on them... I'll make it a point to confront Allen about it when I get the chance.

Daria: Thank god... so far it looks like she's using her head. I just hope that she comes to us for advice if and or when they decide to go that far.

Trent: I think she'll be okay... we've done a pretty good job at raising her to be responsible.

Daria: (smiles) You faked being oblivious as usual I take it?

Trent: (chuckles) They fall for it every time. God... I never thought pretending not to catch onto anything would prove to be so useful. And I'm so damned GOOD at it too!

Daria: (Sighs) Just remember... I know all your old tricks so don't even try any of that stuff with me.

Trent: Oh no... I've got all NEW tricks for you. Don't you worry a bit about that. (The conversation continues until much later when they finally say goodby and hang up. The scene dissolves into the next day where Daria can be seen escorted into a large oval shaped room by a man wearing a very neat suit. He is obviously some sort of security guard as can be told by the skin color ear bud protruding from his left ear and the fact that he occasionally talks to his cufflinks.)

Man: Please wait here captain Lane... the president will be with you shortly. (The man turns and exits through a door that seems to blend in with the wall perfectly as soon as the door is shut.)

Daria: (scowls) How the hell do they always find their way out of here if the doors are hidden THAT well? (Daria sighs as she begins to look about the office. Towards the center of the office is a large heavy desk made of cherry wood, the desk is covered with various papers and portfolios. All of them bearing the seal of the president of the United States. In front and also to the side of the desk are several comfortable looking chairs in which an official audience could gather for whatever reasons were necessary at the given time. Daria walks over to the double windows behind the desk as they offer a remarkable view of the front lawn.) God... I bet Trent would hate to have to mow THAT patch of grass every other week. (As Daria continues to peer out the windows the main door to the office opens offering through it first the secret service agent who had accompanied Daria into the office earlier, following this man a few steps behind was Jodie Mackenzie dressed in a silk blouse and a dress skirt.)

Jodie: "Hell Fire Lane" as I live and breath... god it's been a long time since we saw each other last.

Daria: (cringes as she hears the mention of this moniker which had been bestowed upon her against her will in the past by someone she had once worked with) (as she turns to face her friend) Jodie... you've always been my friend but I swear to god. If you call me that ever again I WILL put a bullet right in your forehead. (The moment Daria mentioned the word bullet the secret service agent began to reach for his gun as a precautionary measure)

Jodie: (extends her arm towards the agent) Take a pill Walter... that was her version of a joke. Daria is one of the few people I would readily trust with my life. (Beat) It will be alright for you to wait outside, Walter. (Reluctantly the agent complies) Sorry about that Daria... but I already had some nut try to bump me off earlier this year.

Daria: I guess you can't be too careful then. (Jodie gestures for Daria to take a seat and then follows suite herself)

Jodie: I'm sorry to bust on you as soon as I came in the door but I got back from the naval academy earlier today, they were graduating their latest class of recruits. And it seems that you've become quite the legend in the naval community... and the story seems to get wilder and wilder every time I hear it.

Daria: (looks like she might be sick) Oh god... why is it that history can't remember all of the important things that have ever transpired but if some nobody commits a single act under duress history will not only remember it but stretch the truth beyond belief.

Jodie: That's the way life works old friend... which is why I brought it up. I was hoping to get the actual honest to god account from YOU.

Daria: You called me all the way down to Washington D.C. JUST to get the honest to god account of something that I would prefer time forgot all together?

Jodie: (shrugs) There's that and it seemed like a good enough reason to see you again after all this time.

Daria: Don't you have the report from that? It should all be right there I would think.

Jodie: (Picks up a folder of her desk) Yea... as a matter of fact I happen to have the original report right here. But the report is coming from one of the marines who was still in the water at the time. (Jodie opens the folder) A lieutenant Jades... whom you happened to take a bullet for as you tried to haul him into the boat after he'd been hit in the leg already.

Daria: (scowls) I didn't take a bullet for ANYBODY!

Jodie: (closes the folder) There's my point in a nutshell right there, Daria. The report I have is not entirely accurate... so I'd like to hear your first hand account of it. Not for any official reason mind you... I just want to satisfy my own curiosity. (Daria crosses here arms and stares at Jodie for several minutes) Oh alright... there's a SORT of official reason. It seems that following the incident for which you are famed, you were nominated for several awards. The purple heart... which you accepted for being wounded in combat.

Daria: Hey... it was the least the navy could give me for all my trouble.

Jodie: May I continue...? (Daria rolls her eyes and gestures the go ahead) Thank you... as I was saying... you were also nominated for the navy cross which you turned down... you were recommended for promotion by the same officer who nominated you for the navy cross... and you turned it down. (Beat) Do I really need to go on Daria?

Daria: Can you?

Jodie: You know Daria... if you hadn't turned down the promotion you might very well have made rear admiral before you retired.

Daria: My family comes before my job, Jodie. It always has... and I was sick and tired of being screwed in the ass because somebody at the top thought I was the best person for some risky little task that nobody else wanted. I wanted to be with my family more and I hated my job... those two reasons were more than enough to warrant my early retirement.

Jodie: Those are some pretty good reasons, Daria. I'll grant you that. But getting back to the original topic... according to the information in front of me here you still deserve all of these commendations. And unless you tell me WHY you don't want them... as the leader of a nation that is grateful for your contributions... I'm obligated to give them to you. Or your children if they choose to accept them in your place. I'm sure they'd LOVE to hear all of the storied that you've never told them regarding your past experiences.

Daria: (glares) What makes you think I haven't told them already?

Jodie: (smirks) I know you Daria... you won't tell anybody ANYTHING that might cause them to glorify your past. Kids see all of the violence in movies these days and they think it's cool as hell... then they hear that somebody in their family has been in combat and the next thing you know that person has their complete attention. Am I right? (Beat) You have my word as your friend Daria... that your kids will never hear mention of any of this from ME.

Daria: (sighs reluctantly) I was a young lieutenant at the time and the navy had sent myself, Jane, and one other officer from the carrier we were assigned to at the time to deposit and extract a team of marines on special OPS using an assault water craft. The thing was basically a modern day PT boat with all the bells and whistles. With this craft and all our equipment we were ordered to travel up this tidal waterway that led several miles inland and passed by a munitions production plant. And this was no easy trip either... the area along the waterway was completely grown over for at least a hundred yards beyond the banks... you couldn't see squat past the shoreline. But regardless the deposit went off without a hitch... Jane was at the helm... chief petty officer Miles was manning the twin fifty caliber turret at the back of the boat and I was manning the mark forty on the bow. After the deposit we were to fall back to point Charlie three on the map and wait until we were called upon for extraction... well that call came sure enough about two hours later following the sound of a distant explosion. The marines were under heavy fire and...

(The scene fades out and comes back up aboard the water craft in the past. Jane is at the helm with the boat pushing full bore while the com piece in her ear screams for extraction. Both Daria and the other officer stand at their respective positions as the sound of the bow of the boat bouncing across the water muffles anything they said without aid of the comm. Ten minutes later the boat arrives at the extraction point just as the marines are reaching the banks laying down heavy cover fire over every inch of their retreat but despite this mortar fire from the opposing forces had just begun to rain down on them. Jane waited until the last possible second and then shoved the engines into full reverse stopping the boat on a dime only yards away from the marines and causing the bow where Daria was to almost dip below the waterline. The moment the boat was stopped Daria opened up with the mark forty automatic grenade launcher laying down very short intermittent bursts of cover fire while at the same time chief Miles did the same with the fifty cals covering as best as they could the marines retreat into the water. Mortar fire was intensifying as the first soldier made it to the boat and attempted to pull himself in... the others still in the water laying down cover with their own weapons. A second soldier carrying a third who was wounded after stepping on a land mine tried to make their way to the boat as small arms fire began to pour in from the thicket of brush and trees lining the area behind them. Just as the wounded marine was brought aboard the other was hit and dropped below the water line. Daria yelled for somebody to cover her and she dove into the water surfacing with the marine a moment later with her arms wrapped about his chest in effort to keep him afloat. Daria managed to drag him to the boat and almost had him aboard when a rifle shot cracked and a large caliber bullet pierced the left lung of the wounded soldier and exited his back piercing Daria's shoulder and exiting her as well. Daria fell back into the water as the wounded soldier was still being pulled aboard. Fortunately for her another marine went under after her and pulled her to the surface only to have Daria shrug him away and force herself onto the boat. Once there she found her way back to her post and began screaming obscenities as she opened up with a continuous unending sweep of automatic grenade fire. The rest of the marines found themselves taking cover underwater and swimming to the other side of the boat and climbing aboard to elude Daria's wrath. Tree's were exploding in half and showering sparks, limbs and tree trunks on the unseen assailants as Daria continued to fire for two full minutes until the barrel of her weapon was glowing bright red and could no longer fire. The second the last marine was on board Jane Did a high power one hundred and eighty degree turn and high tailed it out of there despite the fact that Daria had since given up on the mark forty and was now firing with her own M-16 until the clip had emptied. When the coast was all clear chief Miles attempted to see to Daria's injury but was shoved away by her and was told to "go see to the guy who got his foot blown off")

(The scene fades and comes back in the present as Daria concludes her story to Jodie)

Daria: And it just so happened that one of the marines was a true southern red neck. The second we got back to the ship the guy walks over to me as I'm being put on a sick bay Gurney, gives me a slap on my bad shoulder, and says "Hell fire Lane... you lit up that area like a god damned Christmas tree!!" Right in earshot of several dozen people who never even witnessed the event. By the time I got out of sick bay the Marine had already told his version of the story to the crew and the whole ship was calling me "Hell fire Lane"

Jodie: (smirks) You still took a bullet trying to save another officer under heavy fire, Daria. While your actions in themselves don't warrant a promotion... that combined with your outstanding record at THIS moment... does. Congratulations Daria... you've failed to convince me. (Jodie slides a small jewelry box across the desk) There's your navy cross. (Slides another jewelry box across the table) And retired or not... there's your star.

Daria: Jodie... even YOU can't promote me for that. There are requirements to be met.

Jodie: Which you had met already about two months before your retirement... if you recall you did put in for it.

Daria: (scowls) But I was passed over... that's another reason I chose to retire

Jodie: Yea... the christening incident. Admiral Bates was still holding a grudge over that so he passed you over to spite you. Actions that were completely unwarranted in my book... I didn't want that sub named after Clinton either.

Daria: So... this had nothing to do with awards I turned down. You just wanted to hear the story from ME?

Jodie: No... it did have to do with all that. I just wanted to make sure you accepted what was rightfully yours,.. despite admiral Bates little faux pas.

Daria: Even though... since I'm retired it'll just be a title.

Jodie: (shrugs) Yea well... I'll see to it that you get the benefits that go with it.

Daria; (raises an eyebrow) Cool... (The room is silent for the next minute or so as they attempt to change topics.)

Jodie: So uh... I heard about Quinn. How's she taking to life in a wheel chair?

Daria: Nothing ever seems to slip by you does it. What have you got surveillance on my whole family or something?

Jodie: (laughs) I'm the president... it's my job to keep tabs on everything. Especially my friends... so like I said...?

Daria: What can I say... she hates it. For the first couple of months she cried off and on despite the fact that the doctors had informed her that she would likely lose the use of her legs if they tried to remove the tumor from her lower spine.

Jodie: It was dug in that deep...?

Daria: Not so much deep... it was interwoven between several main nerves. Even the best doctor couldn't have completed the procedure without breaking or cutting at least one of them. But it was either that or eventual death as the doctors said it was certain to spread quickly. Fortunately Quinn has come to accept that fact and is now doing the best that she can to cope. Joey has been a tremendous help in that department... I have to give him a lot of credit. I thought from my experiences in high school that he would be the worlds second biggest loser when Quinn married him. But I was wrong... he's really been supportive of her. Especially now... he's put up with so much of Quinn's crap stemming from her loss yet every time he comes up with a new and inventive way to help her.

Jodie: Oh my god... that' so sweet. Like what for example?

Daria: (thinks for a moment) Uh... well he asked if she wanted one of those motorized wheel chairs but Quinn turned it down flat stating that she had to find some way to stay in shape without using her legs so she'd prefer use her arms to push herself around rather than get fat. Though I think it had more to do with maintaining her independence. (Beat) However she DID let him get her a chair with a seat that raised up and down so she could still reach high up shelves... I imagine that as sort of a compromise to make him feel more helpful.

Jodie: Did Quinn stay with you at all after the surgery?

Daria: (Sighs) As much as I hate to admit it... I did offer. (Shrugs) But Quinn refused... saying that she didn't need my sympathy and that we'd just get into our old routine of fighting with each other. (Beat) She was probably right. (Jodie laughs)

Jodie: She still has control of her other personal functions though... right?

Daria: Yea... fortunately all she lost was the use of her legs. She still has control of everything else... it's a shame she couldn't have kids in the first place though. She's always envied me for that.

Jodie: She's not alone on that one you know... three hundred million worldwide were killed at Y2K and sixty percent of the worlds surviving population were sterilized as a result of the fallout that circled the globe. In the US alone maybe one in fifteen people can reproduce... I know dozens of people in this building alone who would gladly pull their own teeth to be in YOUR shoes.

Daria: (looks uncertain) Just what are you getting at, Jodie?

Jodie: You've no doubt heard of the surrogate foundation.

Daria: You're suggesting that I donate some of my own eggs to some stranger I'll never even know?

Jodie: No... I'm suggesting that you make arrangements to donate ONE... to your sister. Give her the chance to have what you have.

Daria: (glares) You know what... I can't even talk about this right now. It goes against what I believe in far more ways than I can think of. Next subject please... !!

Jodie: But ...

Daria: Next subject please!!

Jodie: (sighs) Fine... I was going to discuss this later with you but it's obvious it'll have to come sooner. What we're about to speak of is classified and does not leave the room. (Jodie opens a drawer in the desk and pulls out a CD player and the loads it just before pressing the play button. A strange sounding gibberish is heard emanating from the speakers) Have you ever heard this before...?

Daria: (Listens closely) Yea... we'd pick it up on SONAR from time to time. We'd always dismissed it as either noise clutter caused by the crew reverberating off our own hull or some sort of interference caused by our own equipment. Why do you ask?

Jodie: Because yours wasn't the only sub to pick it up. And everybody's equipment can't be malfunctioning.

Daria: So what then...?

Jodie: We're not sure... all we know is that whenever it's picked up the computer says it's coming from the boat itself. Yet all equipment checks out normally... and something else interesting... it only occurs in the mid to northern Atlantic.

Daria: (shrugs) Okay... so what do you think it is...?

Jodie; That's what I'd like YOU to help us find out.

Daria: (smacks her fist on Jodie's desk in irritation) Son of a bitch... I knew it! I knew the second you mentioned that promotion "I deserved" as you put it... that you had the intention of reactivating me. My situation is clear Jodie... my family comes first. I'll be damned if I'm going to go traipsing around the Atlantic for months at a time again.

Jodie: I never said you were... and I'm not reactivating you. I'm ASKING you to come back for a LIMITED amount of time... and although you WILL have command over as many as six vessels... there will not be the need for you to leave land. This for the most part will be a regular job... you'll be able to go home to your family every day.

Daria: (raises an eyebrow) So... I can say no and you'd respect that...?

Jodie: I would... but I'm hoping it won't have to come to that. You can take time to think about it... this isn't exactly top TOP priority... we'd just like to solve this little mystery and I know you well enough to think you're the best person for the job.

Daria: Meaning what?

Jodie: Meaning... you're one of the few people in the military who doesn't believe in shoot first and ask questions later.

Daria: (smirks) Sometimes I wonder if I shouldn't reconsider that belief. (Sighs) So if you're worried about shoot first and ask later then you believe this might be some sort of new sea life?

Jodie: Our intelligence people think this may be some sort of language... so yes.

Daria: Interesting... so tell me what you'd need from me and I'll think about it. (Jodie smirks and presses the intercom to order lunch while they discuss the topic at hand)

(Cut to several miles out to sea... Amy is aboard the charter boat with John as it motors about the Atlantic with it's fifty or so passengers hoping to catch at least SOME fish. John stands by the railing on the port side while regularly changing his bait hoping something will bite... Amy on the other hand has opted to reel in her line and just watch everybody else's futile attempts while every so often going below decks to buy another box of bait for John.)

Amy: So how much of that stuff are you planning to waste before you finally realize that the fish are just too smart to take your stupid booby trapped food?

John: Hey... they've got to slip up sooner or later. There's obviously something hungry down there because everybody's bait keeps disappearing off their hooks. So I'll keep it up as long as it takes just to come up even.

Amy: It's your money... do with it what you like. (Moves to lean against the railing next to John) I'll just stand here and watch you make a fool of yourself. (Steals the baseball cap off his head and places it on her own in an attempt to flirt. John just stares at her with an amused expression)

(Cut to the bridge of the charter boat. The captain is busy at the helm as another crewman stands nearby looking at the map and checking their coarse)

Crewman: We're coming up on jetty light, sir. It should be another fifteen minutes... and then once we're into the channel maybe another half hour before we pull back into port.

Captain: Yea... that sounds about right. (Clenches his fist near his thigh because of a dull ache radiating down his arm) How did our would be fisherman do today?

Crewman: Not well at all sir... I guess we've just stumbled into a dry patch or something.

Captain: Eh... it's not the first time. It'll pick up again in a week or so... it always does.

Crewman: (who has been watching the captain clench his fist off and on) Are you okay sir... you look like you're in pain.

Captain: (chuckles) Eh... it's probably just my arthritis acting up. I have a bottle of pills down in the med cabinet below decks. Could you go get it for me?

Crewman: Sure... no problem. (Leaves the bridge to find the captains medication)

(Cut to the outside deck near the port side railing fifteen minutes later... John has since pulled in his line as he can see they are approaching the jetty lighthouse that marks the beginning of the channel into the bay. The Aperture of the channel consists of two man made islands of jetty's... on top of one of these rock islands is a light house standing seventy feet tall with black and white striping lining the exterior.)

John: Ah the hell with it... I guess this just wasn't my day that's all.

Amy: (Tilts her glasses down a bit and peers over the frames at John) Crawling home busted are we?

John: Not completely. (Steels his cap back from Amy and places it on his own head)

Amy: (Smiles as she shakes her head) Have you ever thought of us being more than just friends, John?

John: I thought we WERE more than just friends... how many regular friends do YOU know of who would let you steal their favorite baseball cap without beating the shit out of you?

Amy: (sighs) That's not QUITE was I was getting at.

John: (chuckles) I know... I'm just messing with your head a bit. I dunno... we get along great. I've just never been able to picture us together. Maybe that's the problem... I'm too used to thinking of you as my friend to think of you in any other way.

Amy: So basically you're saying you respect me too much to even think of getting me in the sack someday?

John: HEY now... I wouldn't go that far. But then I know you well enough not to take that last comment seriously.

Amy: Whoa... and the guy scores a point with the lady for intelligence. What a surprise!

John: (Laughs) And besides... there'd be the whole awkwardness thing caused by our changing relationship. What if it didn't work out... could we REALLY go back to just being friends?

Amy: Eh... you might have a point. But sometimes it's worth it just to take a risk.

John: Am I hallucinating or does it sound like you're actually fishing for a kiss?

Amy: You never know... it just might be the only fish you'll catch today.

John: In that case I hope you don't stink up the car on the way home. (Amy gawks and then grabs Johns cap off his head and smacks him with it. Before they both lean closer together to try for an experimental first kiss)

(Cut to the bridge of the ship... the crewman still has not returned with the captains pills and by this time it is obvious that the pills the captain had wanted were not for arthritis. The captains face has turned a shade of red and he is now sweating and panting as he attempts to remain upright. But after a moment the captains knee's buckle and he falls forward onto the steering wheel and then rolls onto the throttle assembly before sliding down onto the floor)

(Cut to the port side deck at the very same moment... Amy and John are just about to make contact when the ship suddenly veers to the right throwing many of the people on board back against the hull as the engines pick up momentum having been shoved to full throttle.)

John: (Picking himself up) What the hell just happened? Did the captain change his mind about going home or something? (As John is saying this Amy is busy trying to get his attention)

Amy: (After John turns to look at her she points out that they are now on a diagonal intercept coarse with the jetty islands and closing fast) We're gonna run aground!!! (Seconds later the charter boat rams the rocks at full speed causing the bow of the boat to crumple and run up on the jetty's to some extent. The boat tilts violently to the port side sending many of the passengers on that side into the water. Amy having been one of the unfortunate fell into the water and after a moment attempts to surface for air only to have some fat lady who was trying to hold onto the railing of the boat lose her grip and fall into the water right on top of Amy. She tries to come to the surface again with limited success only to have the lady try to use Amy as a flotation device because she can't swim.) (Sputtering for what air she can) Lady... get the hell off me or we're BOTH gonna drown!! (The woman in a panic shoves Amy under again. Realizing that this lady will never listen to reason, ..Amy attempts to push off and swim away under water but instead catches the heel of the lady's boot on her forehead as the fat lady continues to kick and struggle to stay afloat in her panic. Amy is rendered unconscious and is seen drifting out of sight into the murky depths below)

(Cut to Jane and Allen as they are sitting in the local pizza place scarfing down a slice each)

Allen: So what's it like to be a college teenager?

Jane: Eh... not really all that much fun as it's cracked up to be. Most of the students look at me as if to say "what the hell are YOU doing here". A bunch of jerks... all of them. Many of them won't give the time of day... they treat me like a damned child.

Allen: Sometimes that's the price you pay for being so smart.

Jane: The price is just a little to damned high if you ask... (Jane pauses and slaps her hand to her forehead) OW!!!

Allen: (amused) You know with most people... the hot pizza cheese usually burns the inside of the throat rather than the forehead. But hey... there's nothing wrong with being the individual now is there.

Jane: (Rubs the spot on her forehead) Damn... it felt like I just got kicked in the forehead or something. Now it just feels numb... it's really scary.

Allen: You're a bit young to have a stroke aren't you?

Jane: Shut up... this isn't funny. I think something's wrong.

Allen: Okay... do you want me to take you to the doctor to get checked out or something?

Jane: (thinks for a moment) No... I guess I'll live. I just have a bad headache now and this sudden nagging urge to go to the beach.

Allen: Yea... headaches always do that to me too. It's a wonder I don't get sunburn as often as I feel driven to go down there.

Jane: (scowls) HEY... I never make fun of YOU like that.

Allen: Yea you do... that's one of the many reasons we get along so well... remember? (Looks at her for a moment and then sighs) All right... finish your pizza and then we'll go.

(Cut to about two hours later on a reclusive shore a couple miles away from the derelict charter boat. The scene is dark as waves can be heard crashing in the background... a groan comes from a young woman who is suffering a stomach ache from swallowing sea water. Though not completely awake the woman feels the sensation that she is being probed... specifically about her feet. One of her legs feels like it is being lifted off the beach sand. As seawater washes up around her from a dissipating wave... the light comes up as Amy opens her eyes wearily to see that her right foot is being held in the air by someone else but at this angle Amy only see's a hand with an arm attached to it. Amy straightens her glasses which surprisingly are still on her face and turns her head to look at this mystery person. Her eyes fixate on a slender young woman who appears slightly older than her... and she is naked... at least from the waist up. The woman's long black hair pours over the shoulders to conceal her chest either by accident or on purpose... Amy wasn't sure. The woman seemed to be fascinated with the concept of toes and was studying Amy's closely.)

Amy: Oh my god... I think I'm gonna be sick. I must have swallowed too much seawater or something. (A moment passes) Oh yea... gonna be sick. (Amy hurls up whatever water was in her stomach accompanied by her lunch. After she was finished Amy turned back to look at the woman who was now wearing the most startled look Amy had ever seen. She looked down to get a better look at the person who Amy assumed had pulled her from the water saving her life. She was surprised as all hell to discover that this woman did not possess legs but rather fins and a tail similar in color to the skin of a dolphin) Oh god... what ARE you? Amy reaches forward to touch the woman in attempt to assure herself that she was not hallucinating but only manages to scare the mermaid into a retreat to the sea. As she does so Amy manages to grab her arm) Wait... I won't hurt you!! (the mermaid continues to try to pull away until she reaches the point of panic and inadvertently coughs up what seems like a gallon of seawater. It's at this point that she starts to grasp at her throat and her face quickly begins to turn a shade of blue.) (After staring for a moment) Oh god... your lungs were full of water. THAT's why you were able to stay out of the water. (Beat) And you can't breath... so why am I sitting here like an idiot? (Amy climbs to her feet and drags the mermaid back into the surf and shoves her under water for what seems like forever. After about five minutes the mermaid begins to struggle again and slaps Amy in the head with her tail fin knocking her down into the water. When Amy surfaces she is shocked to see that the mermaid has not fled but is staring at her from a few yards away with the look of fear still present in her hazel eyes. Amy holds her hands up slowly to indicate that she is no danger) I won't hurt you... I swear and I didn't mean to frighten you. I'll just stay right here as long as you don't swim away. (The mermaid just continues to stare) Listen... just out of curiosity. You're not going to burst into song or something are you? I hear Disney characters are prone to doing stuff like that. (The mermaid just stares) Do you speak English? (The mermaid continues to stare) Do you speak at all? (No response) (Amy decides to make gestures in order to communicate) Do you speak...? (Amy makes a gesture with her hand indicating something coming up her throat and out her mouth. She then repeats the question in time with the gesture. After a few moments the mermaids eyes widen signaling that she understands and then nods her head) You DO speak... now we're getting somewhere. (The mermaid points down towards the water) You speak under water... which would make sense since your lungs are FULL of water. (She points to herself) Amy. (She points to the mermaid who in return points down at the water) Okay... lets just hope this isn't just so I don't see you swim away. (Amy closes her eyes and ducks down below the water... a moment later she hears the word Neirte (Nur-tee) , followed by some gibberish sounding language. Amy surfaces in time with the mermaid) Um okay... Neirte. I guess I owe you my thanks... I probably would have drowned if... (Notices that the mermaid is trying to look past her to the beach) What are you looking at? (Amy turns to notice a large box of bunker that was being used for bait on board the charter boat) You saved a box of bait? (Neirte cautiously moves off to the side of Amy and as a wave comes past her she allows it to pick her up and carry her to shore with the skill of a professional body surfer. Once there she grabs the box and holds it close as if she were coveting a child.) Okay um... you're not going to eat that are you? I mean... it's probably gone bad by now. (Neirte fumbles with the box until she manages to get it open and then takes a large bite out of one of the defrosted fish inside) Oh GROSS... I guess that all doesn't mean much to you does it. (Amy takes the opportunity... as long as Neirte is distracted, to move in close to the shore) You were the one stealing everybody's bait weren't you? (Neirte continues to eat) How did you get here? (Neirte stops eating and looks up at Amy since it's obvious she's going to keep trying to communicate. Amy repeats the question with gestures indicating "you"... and "here." Neirte after a moment responds by drawing a picture of a whale in the sand with a corkscrew tail.) You hitched a ride on a whale? (Beat) Whales don't have corkscrew tails... (Amy reflects on the past when she would watch her mothers sub depart) But submarines DO! You thought a submarine was a whale and you hitched a ride with it... didn't you? (The scene fades as Amy and Neirte begin exchanging pictographs in the sand stopping every ten minutes or so allowing Neirte to retreat back into the water for air.)

(Cut to the upstairs residence of the white house. Jodie and Daria have sat themselves down for dinner in the dining room. In the background a Tv displays the beginnings of the local news for Daria's resident town.)

Daria: I can't believe you can get any channel in the country on this thing.

Jodie: Hey... they pull out all the stops. I've got to stay informed so they get me any and all channels available. It's great... thousands of channels to choose from and it's all the same boring news and shows.

Daria: God forbid anybody should come up with anything original. Even SSW jumped the shark a while back. They eventually took it off the air all together.

Jodie: That's a shame... I know how much you enjoyed that program.

Daria: Eh... it's cool. I think I about had my fill with watching the despicable nature of humanity when the worlds computers were trusted not to screw up at Y2K. And just look what THAT got us.

Jodie: So how do you go about keeping yourself entertained NOW?

Daria: That's where my family comes into play... they're non stop entertainment right there. The house is always in danger of being burned down by Trent... the kids are a mere sixteen years old and they're smarter than most rocket scientists. Jane's the other woman for some guy who will remain nameless and me... well lets just say because of my career I've become a lot of things I hate, and I've become a few things for which I'm proud of.

Jodie: (looks down at her plate and sighs) I'm not the one responsible for drafting you, Daria. I didn't like what went on any more than you did. (Sighs) And then when I lost Mack to cancer a few years ago... I would have given every thing I was just to reverse this whole mess.

Daria: Are you under the impression that I'm blaming you for something? I blame nobody but myself for some of the things that I've had to do. But regardless of who's to blame for what... life goes on. And sometimes it even throws you a few small but priceless bonuses.

Jodie: I know, Daria. And to be honest... earlier today when I spoke of all the people who would wish to have what you have I was speaking more of myself than anything else. I wish I could have a family like yours... not that I'm asking for anything. Please don't misunderstand... I just find myself wishing for the impossible sometimes. But on a side note, I really think you should give some thought towards your sister. She may have lost the use of her legs but she's got a loving husband and with your help could gain a loving family to compensate.

Daria: (scowls and then sighs) Look... (The news in the background interrupts with a special bulletin)

TV: Our top story tonight is a charter boat out of Seaside harbor that ran aground today on the rock islands of jetty light. The cause of the grounding is not yet known to us at this time but the authorities HAVE managed to pull most of the passengers and crew out of the water. I am however receiving confirmed reports that one or more passengers are missing. Coast guard officials are currently searching the surrounding area with so far no luck. (the sound fades to the background as Daria turns to Jodie with concern)

Daria: Can I use the phone to call home..?

Jodie: Punch star eight for an outside line. (Daria immediately dials and after only one ring Trent picks up)

Trent: AMY...?

Daria: Trent... where's Amy?

Trent: Damn... I was hoping you were Amy. I was just watching the news and suddenly realized that Amy hadn't checked in yet. She was supposed to have been home two hours ago.

Daria: I don't believe this... Trent call everybody you can. Maybe we'll get lucky and she's just been hanging out with her friends before deciding to grace us with her presence. In the mean time I'll catch the first flight home.

Trent: I don't think there's a need to worry... if Amy were missing I think somebody would have notified us by now. You stay there and I'll call you as soon as she comes in the door. Don't you worry... okay?

Daria: That's easier said than done, Trent. (Daria exchanges goodbye's and hangs up the phone) Okay... I don't know where my kid is so I'm not about to sit on my ass. Is there anything we can do from here?

Jodie: Like what? We're not even sure if your daughter is one of the missing passengers.

Daria: Cut me a break, Jodie. Isn't there some extra people you can call in or something to look for her? At least for the sake of helping an old friend?

Jodie: (sighs) I imagine I could call in a few extra air units from the national guard to assist. (Jodie walks over to where Daria is standing and picks up the phone)

(Cut to the beach along Seaside harbor... it is getting towards dusk now and Jane and Allen are driving in his jeep over the beach sand)

Allen: Just so you know... I could get arrested for driving like this. They only allow emergency vehicles on the beach last time I checked.

Jane: (without turning to look at him) Nobody's spotted us yet have they? Just keep driving for now.

Allen: I honestly don't think anybody is down here. Not all hunches are correct you know... in fact that headache you got could have been caused by just about anything.

Jane: It wasn't a headache. I told you... it felt like somebody had just kicked me in the head and then that section of my forehead went numb.

Allen: Yea... and you think that had something to do with your sister?

Jane: We are twins after all... they say there's an almost psychic bond between people like us.

Allen: That applies to IDENTICAL twins... not fraternal.

Jane: It could still apply... and besides it's the only way I could explain how I felt.

Allen: (shakes his head and turns his lights on to compensate for the fading daylight) Does the term plain and simple "migraine" mean anything to you?

(Cut to Amy and Neirte who are still exchanging pictographs in the sand)

Amy: (She has since drawn in the sand a sort of map of the Atlantic ocean with the landmasses on either side) Okay... we're HERE (she draws an x at their general location and then points to Neirte before she waves her open hand over the map she's drawn) Where are YOU from? (Neirte looks the map over for several minutes but seems unsure where to mark it. Instead she begins to write English letters in the sand next to the map. She writes slowly as if trying to recall from memory each letter... what she wrote spelled USS Thresher) Do you understand what you've written? (Points to herself) That's my language!! (Amy's heightened mood fades quickly as she realizes that Neirte is just copying what she'd seen and doesn't understand at all... she was just trying to give a reference AMY might understand) You got my hopes up for a second there. (Neirte points to the word in the sand and then points to the map) Give me a minute... that name sounds like something I heard in history class. (Beat) Oh WAIT... the Thresher was a US submarine that went down off the coast of New Hampshire. And if I catch your drift you're saying you live in a ship wreck not too far away from where we are now. Damn... and here I thought you were going to say you lived out in east Jabib somewhere where no human has ever gone. (Neirte just stares at Amy as she tries to comprehend the words flying out of her mouth. After a few minutes Amy stops talking and groans as she leans to one side to remove her wallet from her back pocket) Ugh... this little bugger is cutting off the circulation to my butt. (Neirte actually moves CLOSER, almost to where she and Amy occupy the same space, to examen this seemingly fascinating new article) Huh... whip out something she's never seen before and all of a sudden caution is thrown to the proverbial wind. (Amy begins to open the wallet to reveal it's contents but doesn't get quite that far as Neirte snatches it and begins to go through it herself dropping the contents onto the sand once she's inspected them) Hey now... I need that stuff back. (Neirte stumbles across a picture within the wallet of Amy and her family) That's my family... see this is me. (She gestures to the picture and then herself) And this is my mother, father, and my sister. (Amy points to the picture and then to Neirte) Do you have any family? (She repeats the question and gesture until Neirte seems to understand. Neirte then draws three figures in the sand, pointing to the center figure and then to herself to indicate that this was a representation of her. Amy figured immediately that the other two must be her parents. Amy was shocked however when Neirte erased the figure of her and then drew a fish with large teeth on either side of the parent figures.) Oh my god that's horrible... your family was eaten by sharks! (Neirte moves her tail around far enough to show Amy the scars left by teeth) And they almost got YOU? Jesus... and I thought I had it rough growing up. So you're all alone now... man that SUCKS! (Amy extends a hand to shake) Well... you've got somebody now. Wanna be friends? I'd love to learn more about you. (Neirte just stares) Friends... they're almost like family. They at the very least help each other. (She motions to shake hands again. Neirte just grabs her extended hand and then looks it over and under in confusion. Amy slowly reaches out and takes hold of Neirte's hand, fear can be seen in the mermaids eyes again as she does so. Amy guides Neirte's hand towards her own and then joins them and shakes. Neirte just looks Amy up and down before reaching out and wrapping her arms about Amy in a sort of hug) Um... okay... either you got the jist of things or you're under the impression that I've just adopted you. (Neirte suddenly lets go and perks her head up towards the south) What...? (Amy turns to look as headlights can be seen in the distance.) That's just a car... (As Amy turns to look at Neirte she discovers that the mermaid has already retreated into the sea and disappeared) AWWWWW... son of a... (smacks her fist against the sand) DAMN!! (Amy begins to pick up the contents from her wallet not noticing that the picture was missing. After several moments later the vehicle approaches close enough to tell it's a jeep)

Jane: (from her seat in the jeep) You see... I TOLD you she was down here!! (Allen brings the jeep to a halt with Jane jumping out before a complete stop is reached. In the headlights harsh glow, Jane can see as she approaches her sister that there is a large bruise on her forehead in the shape of a boot heel) Good god... what happened to you?

Amy: I got a first hand look at what the crew of the Titanic must have felt like... with a bit of a twist in the plot line.

Allen: (As he walks over from the jeep) Your boat SANK?

Amy: Not quite like that... it ran aground and then leaned hard to it's side throwing half of the passengers into the water. Along with this big fat BITCH who tried to use me as a floatation device. (beat) You mean it wasn't on the news or anything? Then how did you know to come looking for me?

Allen: We never even heard the news... we were just following this hunch your sister had.

Amy: You had a hunch... and it was RIGHT? (Shakes her head) Man... if your hunches are THAT good then I'll have to let you pick out my lottery numbers when I'm old enough to play.

Jane: Eh... it's a twin sister thing. (Amy raises an eyebrow in interest) So where did this all happen?

Amy: We ran aground out by jetty light, some fat lady fell off the boat onto me and then kicked me in the head. The next thing I knew I was waking up here on the beach. (Jane and Allen just stand there and stare at Amy) What...?

Allen: Amy... jetty light is two miles out to sea. If you were knocked unconscious... how did you manage to come so far without drowning?

Amy: (sighs heavily) You wouldn't believe me if I told you. (Jane's cell phone rings and after digging through her pocket she picks up)

Jane: Yea..? Oh hey dad... yea Amy's with us. Of coarse she's fine... she just went for a swim that's all. We'll fill you in when we get home... okay bye. (She hangs up) Apparently the accident WAS on the news because according to dad he's been going out of his mind trying to find you. Oh and mom heard to... so I wouldn't expect to be allowed to go on a charter ever again. There's that and apparently the coast guard is out searching for missing passengers so we've got to fill them in too. What a fun night... huh?

Amy: (sighs) Can we just go home? (Allen just nods and helps Amy up off the wet beach sand)

Allen: Do you want to go get that bruise checked out first?

Amy: What the hell for... I already know what caused it. (Jane chuckles as they pile into the jeep and depart the area. As they leave the scene pulls back to just off shore as a mermaid peers from behind a large rock looking back and forth between a wallet size photograph and the departing jeep)

(Cut to Daria's house as Amy, Jane, and Allen come walking in the front door. Even though riding in the back of an uncovered jeep managed to dry her off somewhat... a majority of her clothes are damp and full of beach sand as well as sea salt.)

Trent: (Trent walks up and gives Amy a hug and then backs away) Oh man... what the hell happened to you? You look like you swam the English channel in a pair of jeans. I thought you made it off the boat okay.

Amy: Eh... I made it off the boat at least. As for okay... well I'm lucky to be alive no thanks to some fat heifer who never bothered to learn how to swim. Geez... if you can't swim then what the hell are you doing out on a boat for gods sake?

Trent: (Looks at the bruise on Amy's forehead) Did the coast guard bother to get you checked out when they pulled you out of the water?

Jane: They didn't... we found her on the beach a couple miles away. It's a miracle she made it that far in my opinion.

Trent: (looks at Amy) So they don't know you've been found? (Sighs) We'd better give them a call then before they declare you legally dead or something. (Shakes his head) But first I think you should give your mother a call before she starts ripping her hair out. She was all ready to jump on the first plane home to come looking for you.

Amy: Really... cool. (Trent goes into the kitchen to go get the cordless phone.)

Allen: So how exactly did you manage to get a couple miles away from the boat while being unconscious and still managing to avoid becoming a drowning statistic? (Beat) Yea I know... we wouldn't believe you if you told us... well tell us anyway.

Jane: Sure... we love a good tall tale as much as the next person.

Amy: Look... there's no point in giving you the details because all you would do is use it to mock me over the next year or so. All I'll say is I made a new friend and she's a REALLY good swimmer. And... she didn't want to be seen when you guys showed up. It might have something to do with the fact that she's not from this country... you can never tell these days.

Allen and Jane: (turn to each other and speak in unison) Illegal alien.

Allen: Have you ever noticed those are the kinds of people who always turn out to be the best heros? They save your life and then to avoid attention they disappear leaving you with this profound sense of mystery.

(Trent comes walking into the living room with the cordless phone)

Trent: You're mom's on the phone. (Hands the phone to Amy)

Amy: Hey mom... what's shaken?

Daria: Thank god... where the hell have you been? I've been going out of my mind ever since I saw the news earlier? I was afraid that the boat that sank was the boat you went out on.

Amy: It was... and I managed to go for a bit of a swim. But all's cool now... I'm home safe. Albeit a little wet and disgusting but safe all the same. (Frowns and turns to Amy and Allen) Speaking of which... did anybody hear from John? I haven't seen him since the boat.

Daria: He's okay... although he managed to get his five minutes of fame as soon as he was pulled out of the water. I saw him being interviewed on one of the news updates... he seemed pretty shaken up all things considered. He even went as far as to say he saw a mermaid stealing boxes of bait that had fallen into the water. I hate to say it but I think the other people at your school are going to be laughing at him for a while.

Amy: (raises an eyebrow) Um... yea. I guess so... I mean that's a pretty whacked out tale right? Who would believe something like that?

Daria: Are you alright, Amy? You sound a bit flustered all of a sudden.

Amy: Oh no... I'm fine. As long as John was telling the news people about his hallucination... did he give a description?

Daria; Does it matter? He probably just swallowed a bunch of seawater.

Amy; Yea... you're right. I was just curious that's all.

Daria: (sighs heavily) Look... I plan to catch the first flight out of here in the morning so when I get home you can tell me all about what happened. Just don't go on any more charters for a while... I've got enough grey hair as it is now.

Amy: Oh mom... what's a few more. They're like battle scars... they add character.

Daria: I beg to differ young lady... and when you get to be my age, if you ever allow yourself to live that long, you'll understand just how I feel.

Amy: I'll take your word on that. I'll see you when you get home, mom. (Amy Hangs up) Mom will be home in the morning.

Jane: Fabulous... I wonder if she'll freak when she see's the bruise and hears that you almost drowned.

Trent: No matter... it should be an adventure either way.

(Cut to the residence in the white house just as Daria and Amy had gotten off the phone with each other.)

Daria: Amy's okay.

Jodie: I told you she would be, ..didn't I?

Daria: Yes... you're all knowing now be quiet.

Jodie: As you wish.

Daria: And none of that mushy talk... I've seen "The Princess Bride". (Jodie laughs)

Jodie: (opts to change the subject) I noticed you paid attention to what that kid was saying on the news earlier.

Daria: It was a load of bull being spouted by a teenager who swallowed too much seawater. What can I say... it made for a good laugh and it managed to get my mind off things for a few minutes.

Jodie: Maybe so... but it seems to confirm suspicion about the Pentagon's theory. Maybe there IS something out there that we haven't discovered yet.

Daria: Yea... about five thousand new kinds of plankton most likely. But I wouldn't count on any of them trying to communicate any time soon. (Recieves a please take this seriously look from Jodie) (Sighs) And of coarse you want ME to be the one to find it?

Jodie: Like I said... I know I can trust you.

Daria: But can I really trust YOU... after all you ARE a politician now.

Jodie: Now THAT hurts... you know me better than that, Daria.

Daria: I know my ass hurts from all the times I've been screwed over by this government... how do I know I'll REALLY be able to get out when I want to?

Jodie: You have my word I'll push the paper work right through... I've never broken my word to you ONCE, Daria.

Daria: (sighs) If it's all the same I think I'll stock up on some Vaseline anyway. (Beat) And I want to get Jane in on this if she's willing. I know she could use the money... her paintings haven't been such a hot item on the market as of late.

Jodie: I can't get her a promotion... you at least deserved yours. Jane never even put in for one.

Daria; That doesn't matter so much... we'll still be working together like old times. If she says yes then I'm on the job... if the answer is no then you'll have to find somebody else.

Jodie: (sighs) I'll ask her then. But just to give you some reassurance that I'll watch out for you... (Jodie hands Daria a piece of paper with a phone number on it) This is my direct line. Just don't show that to anybody... not even my mother has that number.

Daria: (Raises an eyebrow) ALRIGHT... I take precedence over your own mother. One can't expect to rank any higher than that... just don't expect me to tuck you in at night. (Jodie just rolls her eyes)

(Cut to Amy's house about two hours later. A car has just pulled up outside of the house and is so noted by Jane peering out the front picture window)

Jane: Hey Amy... I think John just rolled up to the house.

Amy: Are you sure?

Jane: Well... the hunk of rust he's driving looks pretty familiar. And it looks like this guy went for swim recently... so I would have to say yes I'm sure.

Amy: Great... with the description you just gave it could be some nut who killed John for his car and then broke down in front of our place. (Amy rolls her eyes and gets up to greet John at the front door)

(As John reaches the front door and is about to knock the door opens and Amy steps outside and closes the door behind her.)

John: Amy... I'm glad to see you're alright. I was worried when I lost sight of you. But then when I got word that you had been found I decided to grab the car and shoot on over here.

Amy: So who was it who told you the good news?

John: Well... nobody actually TOLD me. I was just sort of eves dropping on a few of the coast guard people at the right time.

Amy: Hmm... yea, well don't get all misty eyed on me or anything because I'm okay. (John smiles and leans close and kisses her. Amy just stands there dumbfounded)

John: We were unfortunately interrupted earlier so I decided to pick up where we left off. I figured I may not have the chance to do that again all things considered. And it's also my way of saying I'm glad you're okay.

Amy: (Slightly flustered) Uh... yea, thanks. (Beat) So anyway I heard you were on the news earlier. You know my moms laughing at you from DC over the bit about the mermaid. She thinks you swallowed too much seawater.

John: Hey... I saw what I saw. Let her laugh all she wants... I don't care one bit.

Amy: So... what did she look like?

John: Very pretty... long raven black hair... slender body and a grey tail. I wish I had a photo of her.

Amy: Huh... not exactly like in the story books is it. Well... maybe you'll see her again sometime.

John: Yea... in my dreams maybe.

Amy: (clears here throat) Um... you know John. You don't exactly have to dream of fictitious women when you've got a real one right one right in front of you.

John: Do my ears deceive me or are you fishing for another kiss?

Amy: Not fishing... I've had enough of that for today. (Steals John's baseball cap off his head and puts it on her own)

John: (steals back his cap and then runs his fingers through Amy's hair being careful not catch any newly formed knots from being in the ocean) In due time... no need to rush things you know. But I really just came by to see for myself that you were okay... and now that I've done that I can feel sleep catching up on me so I'm going to go. I'll see you tomorrow in school... you can be the one defending me against those who would laugh at me for my wild imaginative story on public Tv. (John turns to walk back to his car)

Amy: (As she watches him go) I wouldn't miss it for the world.


The End ...

Comments are always welcome. I may be reached at wildgoose81@hotmail.com