Live the Movies
Plot: All of Lawndale gets stuck in bunch of movies do to Chris who has found a loophole in the system and now has control of the world. (Yes Chris returns.)
Part 1: It Begins
It is a nice day in Lawndale it has been 6 months since Hell In A Hand Basket. Daria and Jane's lives have been just like they were before Chris had arrived in Lawndale. Meanwhile in hell Chris reigns supreme on the count he had killed Satan.
Chris: Grrrrrr this sucks. I can't kill them it's been months since a good idea. Loki, bring me the book of rules. Let's see if I can do anything.
Chris starts reading through the book. His eyes suddenly widen and an evil grin spreads across his face.
Chris: Yes here it is I can say this chant that gives you Mystical powers to do with a planet of your choice I can put Earth as the planet.
Chris pronounces the spell and a blot of lightning hits him.
Chris: Well that was unusually easy.
Chris first uses his newfound power to teleport to Lawndale.
Cut To: Lawndale High School.
Daria: Well today has been amusing Mr. Demartino got in a fight with Ms. Li. The Fashion Club started beating the hell out of each other. Plus Brittany and Kevin broke up again.
Jane: All that's left is a plane falling on Upchuck.
Daria: Don't count on it.
Chris suddenly appears infront of the two girls.
Daria: You're back.
Jane: We killed you.
Chris: Shit lot of good that does to a dead guy, Satan no less.
Daria: Why are you here?
Chris: I just wanted you 2 to be the first to know I now am in control of this planet and it's people.
Daria: You're full of crap.
Chris: Oh really. I can do anything to you right now with a snap of my fingers.
Jane: Prove it.
Chris snaps his fingers and Daria and Jane's clothes disappear. Daria and Jane run into the bathroom.
Daria (from the bathroom): That's not funny.
Chris snaps his fingers again. Daria and Jane walk out but they are dressed like Quinn.
Daria: I guess you're just going to kill us now.
Chris: No in fact I'm going to give you a chance to get control of Earth back to God. You just have to beat me. But to do so...
Being tackled by Quinn cuts off Chris. Quinn grabs him by the shirt and pulls him forward.
Quinn: What are you doing here?
Chris: I'm on vacation.
Chris shoves Quinn off him.
Chris: It won't be so easy to win you got to go through 3 stages to get to me and if you get through the stages and me Earth belongs back to God.
Jane: What kind of stages.
Chris: Movie plots like Star Wars, Jaws, and Lord of The Rings something to that extent. But those exact movies will not be used. And you'll have to fight a copy of me I'll be the bad guy in the movies.
Daria: How do we know if you'll give it back to us if we win?
Chris: You don't. So contact me if you want to try to get Earth back. Just say "666". I'll explain more about it if you decide to try it out.
Chris turns around and starts walking away. He turns back.
Chris: Oh and Quinn one more thing.
Chris snaps his fingers and walks away. Quinn's clothes disappear.
Upchuck: Grrrrrr feisty.
Out of nowhere a plane crashes through the roof of Lawndale and lands right on Upchuck.
Daria: Now the day is complete. Should we try to get the Earth back?
Jane: What's the worst he can do?
Jane shouldn't have said those words because the next 3 days were a living hell. Everyone found himself or she getting limbs mixed up with each other, demons were taking over, and the malls were destroyed. Daria decides what the difference so she says 666. Chris appears almost instantly.
Daria: Ok the town will play your little game.
Chris: I'm glad.
Chris snaps his fingers and the 2 are now standing in a dark tower.
Daria: Where are we?
Chris: This is one of my favorite movies "The Crow". By the way if anyone dies in these stages they will be teleported to hell and kept in a chamber.
Daria: What do I have to do? And where are my friends and family?
Chris: They're around. You'll find out that you may have to kill them. You've seen The Crow right.
Chris: Ok basically you and you're boyfriend were killed last year. In the move your boyfriend would come back but since I rearranging it you'll be the main person. You got to kill all the people that killed your boyfriend and you. Plus you have to kill the main bad guy who was behind it all. Which, of course is me.
Daria: So as soon as I kill the main bad guy I advance to the next stage.
Chris: You catch on fast don't you? STAGE BEGIN!
Chris disappears and Daria looks around. She sees white face paint and black lipstick. She puts it on. (She looks like Brandon Lee from "The Crow") She runs toward a window and jumps out of it. You just see the window and you know what pops up.
Part 2: Enter "The Crow"
(Author's Note: Not everyone in Lawndale knows that they are being switched to different movies. And this won't go exactly like the movie. This is so it is shorter if you've seen "The Crow" you know what scenes I've done it to.)
As Daria is falling she just notices she can't fly.
Daria: Chris tricked me.
Daria hits the round full force. She gets back up.
Daria: What the hell.
Suddenly a crow lands on her shoulder. The crow looks a little like Jane.
Daria: Is that you Jane?
The crow: Yes it is. So you decided to give Chris's game a chance.
Daria: What's your point?
Jane: Damnit Daria, now everyone is like the people from "The Crow" and frankly I don't like being a crow.
Daria: Chris said I have to avenge my boyfriend's death and mine. But, I don't know how to find them.
Jane: Chris told me I fly around and if I see one of the bad guys you show up.
Daria: All right start looking.
Jane flies off. Meanwhile Quinn has become Sarah she rides up on her skateboard to the people officer who is Jake.
Quinn: Ewwwwwww how'd I get dressed in these crappy clothes and why am I riding a skateboard?
Jake: Hey Kiddo why am I a cop I was just at home?
Quinn: I think I may know. I just have to find Daria.
Meanwhile at The Pawn shop the owner who is short bald and pudgy but has Chris's face is talking with one of the four people that killed (according to the movie plot) Tin-Tin who is played by Mack.
Upchuck: I'll give you $50 for the radio.
Mack: Listen asshole that's a brand new piece.
Upchuck: You mean it was stolen. 50 take it or leave it.
Upchuck throws a 50 dollar bill on the counter. Mack grabs walks out cursing under his breath.
Mack: Stupid punk he's lucky I didn't stab his weird ass.
Mack walks into a dark alley when The Crow lands next to him. Daria is now right above him on a building. She drops off it. Mack turns around and sees Daria walking toward him.
Mack: You better leave freak.
Daria continues walking toward her.
Mack: All right you want to fight.
Daria grabs Mack and starts throwing him around. She starts pummeling him. Mack gets up and jumps back and throws a knife at her she dodges and grabs the knife. She walks up to Mack and stabs him. Daria looks down and realizes what she had just done.
Daria: OMG I just killed Mack.
Jane lands on Daria's shoulder.
Jane: Don't worry he's not really dead he is now just in Chris chamber.
Daria turns around and walks up to the pawnshop and starts banging on the door.
Pawnshop Owner: Get the fuck outta here ya punk kid.
Daria bangs on the door harder. The P.O grabs a shotgun and cocks it. Daria smashes through the glass on the window then breaks down the door.
Daria: As I hear it gently rapping rap rap rapping at my chamber door. So did you hear me rapping at your chamber door?
Owner: Get outta of here.
Daria walks toward the storeowner. The owner shoots her. Daria stumbles backwards and starts laughing. The bullet hole clears up and she punches the guy behind the counter. She notices a knife by the guy she picks it up and stabs him through the hand. The owner lets out a scream.
Daria: One year ago you sold me a gold ring with a ying-yang sign on it where is it?
Owner (between screams): I keep the rings in a safe over there.
He points to a safe. Daria sees a shotgun while walking over to the safe and picks it up. She opens the safe and starts looking through the rings. She finds the one she is looking for and she puts some rings in her shotgun. As she is walking back to the guy she kicks over some gas cans and they leak on the floor. She walks up to the guy who has finally got the knife out of his hand and she start pegging him with the rings.
Daria: Each one of these rings is a life you ended.
Daria turns and starts walking out.
Owner: You walk out of that door and every cop will be after you, you stupid fuck.
Daria turns back to him.
Daria: Is that gasoline I smell?
Owner: No don't.
Daria fires the shotgun and the whole store blows up.
Outside the rest of Tin-Tin's (Mack's) gang was outside waiting for her.
Thug 1: There is the one who killed Tin-Tin.
He runs at her with a knife. Daria puts gun the to his head and fires. The 2nd thug runs at her and impales him through the chest with a shotgun. The 3rd thug tried to go hand-to-hand combat with her but Daria beat the hell out of him leaving him to die. Daria starts walking away when Quinn rides up in her skateboard.
Quinn: Daria, what the hell did you do? I ride a skateboard and wear crappy beat up clothes.
Daria: Well you know how things were screwing up since our lasting meeting with Chris.
Daria: Well we have to go through 3 stages. Each stage based off a movie. I just need to find the main bad guy and defeat him and we advance.
Jane lands on Daria's shoulder.
Jane: There is someone heading to the church he looks like Chris so I think he may be who we are after.
Daria runs to the church and kicks open the doors. The man turns around. He has long brown hair, a non clean-cut shave; he's tall, and yes Chris's face.
Chris: I was expecting you. You've reached the end of the stage and your life.
Daria: You must know I can't be hurt.
Chris: Not unless your bird is.
Chris pulls out a gun and shoots Jane in the leg she falls off Daria's shoulder. Chris runs up a flight of stairs. Daria follows close after. Daria gets to the roof and looks around for Chris. Chris walks out from the shadows.
Chris: I'm right here.
Chris jumps up and kicks Daria and she slides across the roof. Daria gets up and punches Chris in the face he stumbles backwards and slides down the roof. Daria slides down after him. She finds Chris standing on a part of the roof that straightens out. Daria slides down to meet him. Chris headbutts Daria she takes a step back. Chris picks her up and impales her into a statue.
Chris: Ha looks like you couldn't get passed the 1st stage.
Chris's happiness was cut short when Quinn slid down the roof and dropkicks him off the roof. Chris gets impaled right through the head at the bottom. Quinn turns to Daria and pulls her off the statue. All of a sudden they are in their house and Daria's wound is healed. Daria looks around in her room. Everything is normal but then Chris appears.
Chris: So girls you managed to beat stage 1. Mack is with me so don't worry he's alive. Are you ready for stage 2?
Quinn: Shut up Daria lets rest first.
Chris oh but it's too late I just figured out a good movie. You will be entering...
Jane bursts in the room.
Jane (to Daria): We're back.
Daria: No we are taking a rest Chris is going to tell us what our next movie is.
Chris: Yes. As I was saying your next movie is...
Part 3: The Next Movie
(Author's Note: After their 20-minute break. Daria, Jane, Quinn, and the rest of Lawndale end up in the movie "Mortal Kombat". The movie will start off where they arrive on the island. And it does not follow "Mortal Kombat" exactly.)
Chris: Mortal Kombat.
Quinn: You mean the movie with the fighting and brutal killing.
Chris: One of my favorites.
Daria: I saw the movie, who is going to play who?
Chris: Well Trent will play Liu Kang, You'll play Sonya Blade, Jane will be Johnny Cage, Quinn will be Princess Kitana, and I of course will be Shang Tsung.
Jane: What about Scorpion, Sub-Zero, Reptile, Kano, Raiden, and Goro?
Chris: You leave that up to me. Excuse me I need to go get Trent.
Chris disappears and then about a minute later appears holding Trent up by the shirt. Trent is asleep as usual.
Chris: By the way, Quinn you may get separated from the others. Now if you excuse me I got wake up you're only hope. HEY TRENT, WAKE UP.
Trent's eyes flicker and he wakes up.
Trent: Where am I? Who are you?
Chris: Well I'm the one making your whole town look like a freak show.
Trent: Oh I just thought it was the beer.
Chris: Anyway you will begin now.
Chris snaps his fingers and Daria, Trent, and Jane appear in the island featured in Mortal Kombat. Only now Trent has a white tank top and black baggy pants. Daria has a black exercise uniform. And Jane has a blue button down shirt and black dress pants.
Jane: Although I'm not a fashion freak these clothes suck.
Trent: My shirt isn't green.
Daria: We must be adapting to each movie more.
Jane, Trent, and Daria: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
The 3 heroes notice all the people are walking toward a big mountain so they follow.
Cut To: A hall like place.
Daria, Trent, and Jane walk by a statue that looks like a messed up lizard. Daria looks up and notices a red headed person in a blue jump suit. Daria looks closer and realizes it is Quinn. But they keep walking. The 3 people get into the dining hall but it's pretty dim and depressing.
Daria: Finally a dining room I can enjoy.
They sit down and start eating when a tall man in a trenchcoat walks up on to a ledge. The man is obviously Chris as Shang Tsung.
Chris: Welcome everyone. You all have been chosen to fight in Mortal Kombat because you are all the best. Maybe even one of you will have the chance to fight Prince Goro the reining champion.
A bunch of guards run in and start flipping tables and then a man dressed in blue and black steps in the middle of the path cleared out.
Chris (points to man in blue and black.): This is Sub-Zero. He will give you all an example what this tournament will be like.
A ninja steps out directly opposite from where Sub-Zero is standing. The ninja stays in the same stop kicking. Sub-Zero has brought back his hand and a blue element is forming. The ninja does a running jump kick at Sub-Zero but Sub-Zero lets the element go and it freezes the ninja. He hits the floor and shatters.
Chris: Flawless Victory. Fatality.
Trent: Whoa that was pretty cool.
Chris: Now the tournament starts tomorrow get a good rest.
Everyone leaves but Trent, Daria, and Jane decide to look for Quinn. They enter a long dark hall and they see Quinn at the end of it. Quinn runs to them.
Quinn: Ewwwwwww I'm in this ugly blue jumpsuit. Why can't a princess wear fashionable clothes?
Daria: I don't care about your outfit did you learn anything about what we have to do.
Quinn: Well, I know who is fighting whom.
Quinn: Well Trent is facing nobody important in the first round something tells me he's going to win. Then you will fight Kano. Next Jane will fight Scorpion. That's all I know for now.
Cut To: The next day.
Trent and the fighter are in the battle ring.
Chris: From this point forward my island is your battleground. Begin.
Trent gets a swift punch knocking his opponent unconscious. The fight is already over. Chris walks to the knocked out fighter.
Chris: Your soul is mine.
Chris absorbs the guy's soul. A whitish thing flies out of the guy's chest and into Chris's hand.
Cut To: About an hour later.
Daria is in the middle of the battle ring.
Chris: Sonya Blade, I have something for you.
Daria: You don't have anything I want.
Chris: I beg to differ I have something you want very much.
Daria looks over to the little hut and Kano walks out. Daria notices Kano looks like Upchuck. Then someone speaks in her mind.
Voice: Yes I decided to make Upchuck into Kano.
Daria gets ready to fight.
Kano: Well hello baby do you remember me?
Daria: How could I forget?
Kano: Right I left a big smile on your friend.
Kano impersonates slitting a throat. Daria wastes no time and uppercuts him. Kano/Upchuck lands on his back but gets back up. He knees Daria/Sonya Blade. Kano kicks Daria in the chin and she flips backwards. But Daria grabs Kano with her legs and slams him to the ground.
Kano: Please baby give, me a break.
Daria snaps his neck a he dies instantly.
Cut To: Woods.
Jane/Johnny Cage is walking through the woods when Scorpion jumps out from behind a tree.
Scorpion: Get over here.
A string like object shoots out of his hand and chases after Jane. Jane just barely avoids it. She runs at Scorpion and does a flying kick. Scorpion suddenly teleports them to an underground place with bones all over. Scorpion proceeds to beat the hell out of Jane. Jane jumps up to a higher part of the place.
Scorpion: Get Down Here.
Scorpion kicks the supporting beams out from under Jane so they both fall to the bottom of the place. When they are there Scorpion takes off his face to reveal a skull with flames in the eyes. Jane remembers the movie so she picks up a shield and a spear. She throws the spear and slices open Scorpion's left arm. Scorpion then shoots a wave of flame out of his mouth but Jane blocks it. Jane runs up to Scorpion and slices his stomach open. Then she slices the top of his head off. Jane knows what's coming next so she runs. Scorpion explodes and a picture of Jane floats down and it reads "To My Greatest Fan, Jane Lane."
Cut To: Near the beach area.
Trent was being called to the battle circle. When he gets there he notices only Chris and Quinn are there.
Chris: Liu Kang, this is a spar no one will win or lose. Kitana fight now. The two begin to spar but Quinn starts giving tips.
Quinn: In your next fight use the element, which brings life. Oh yea and Jane going to end up fighting Goro. And Goro looks like Kevin.
Chris: That is enough sparing.
Cut To: A temple looking place.
Trent is looking around and notices that Sub-Zero has walked in. Sub-Zero starts forming a huge ice ball. Trent looks around and notices a bucket of water. Trent swings it around and throws it the water forms a giant icicle and stabs through Sub-Zero sending him into the wall and freezing him.
Cut To: Goro's throne room.
Goro/Kevin: Is it time?
Chris: Yes we let these mortals win enough?
Goro (in that Kevin tone): Alright.
Cut To: A bunch of people getting killed by Goro.
Suddenly Jane steps up.
Jane: Ok four eye... arms. It's time you go down.
Goro takes the sunglasses off Jane's face and crushes them.
Jane: Lets dance.
Jane does a spilt and punches Goro in the balls and runs. Goro chases her. He suddenly runs to a cliff and sees Jane.
Jane: Those were 500-dollar sunglasses, asshole.
She kicks Goro off the edge. Jane looks down and sees Goro hanging on.
Jane: This is where you fall down.
Goro hands slides off the edge and he falls to his death.
Cut To: The end of the fight with Reptile. (I don't fell like narrating it.)
Trent crushes Reptiles head.
Cut To: Shang Tsung's palace.
Daria is in the chains and that tacky outfit you see Sonya wear near the end of "Mortal Kombat".
Chris: Well Sonya, will you fight me?
Daria: My friends will come.
3 hooded henchmen unmasked themselves to reveal Trent, Quinn, and Jane.
Jane: They're already here.
Trent: Shang I challenge you.
Chris: I'm not going to waste time meet me on top of the staircase.
Trent and Chris run up to the top of the staircase. The spikes rise from the ground. The Mortal Kombat theme plays. Trent and Chris start fighting. Chris punches Trent but Trent blocks and goes for a knee to the gut. Chris dodges and punches Trent in the face sending him backwards. Trent runs up and spin kicks Chris sending him on the ledge. Trent powers up and does a fire blast looking thingy that sends Chris flying off the ledge and into the spikes. Chris shrivels up into bones and a blinding light comes from his body and so do a lot of souls. Everything starts to get wavy and they all end up back in Daria's house.
Trent: Whoa that was too much I'm going back to bed.
Trent leaves Daria's house.
Quinn: Good I'm out of those clothes.
Voice: But you're going into new ones.
Daria, Quinn, and Jane jump and see Chris standing behind them.
Daria: You ass.
Chris: Well I'm glad to see you made it through Stage 2. Now you will move on to Stage 3, which is...
Part 4: The Final Battle
Chris: ... Hell
Jane, Daria, and Quinn: What?
Chris: I'm tired of waiting so I decided to let you fight the final boss in hell, which is the T-1000.
Quinn: Who's he.
Chris: He's from Terminator 2. And if you beat him you fight me and you know what happens if you beat me.
Daria: Ok so bring us to hell.
Chris: Look around you you're all ready there.
Quinn, Daria, and Jane look around and see a cave like area instead of Daria's room.
Chris: Say hi to The T-1000.
Chris snaps his fingers and the T-1000 appears. Chris waves good-bye and runs away.
Jane: I'll take the robot you 2 get Chris.
Jane leaps at the T-1000 and kicks him in the face. He stumbles back on the edge of the ground. Jane runs and kicks him off the edge and into lava.
Jane: That wasn't so hard.
Jane runs off with Daria and Quinn. The 3 girls catch up with Chris.
Chris: Damn I should have made him stronger. Oh well I guess I'll kill them myself.
Chris stops and turns around.
Chris: Well I guess you 3 are stronger than I thought no matter I'll kill you all.
Chris gives an evil laugh and charges at Daria. Chris punches Daria in the face sending her backwards into a wall. Jane runs and spears Chris but he counters with a knee in the face. Jane falls to the ground.
Chris: Well Quinn, it's just you and me.
Quinn: I was expecting it this way. So while I was in Mortal Kombat I trained.
Quinn jumps up and spin kicks Chris right through a wall. Chris gets up and runs at Quinn he throws a punch but misses. Quinn breaks Chris's arm with her elbow. Chris lets a yell in pain. Quinn kicks Chris in the face Chris flies into the wall. The wall crumbles on top of Chris. Quinn turns away but Chris bursts out of the rubble.
Chris: Here Quinn, Can you beat this?
Chris snaps his fingers and a Neo and Blade Chris jump out of the ground.
Neo Chris: Now baby you will die.
Blade Chris: Indeed.
Chris runs and leaves N.Chris and B.Chris to Quinn. The 2 guys charge at Quinn but a stray fist punches Blade Chris. Quinn turns to see Chris!
Quinn: What are you doing here?
Chris: Helping you out.
Quinn: You just made two clones to kill me and you're helping me.
Chris: Oh I've meaning to tell you that...
Blade Chris punching him in the face cuts off Chris. Chris brings his fist back and punches a hole through Blade Chris. Quinn just barely beats Neo Chris.
Quinn: You were saying.
Chris: ...You never killed me. You killed my evil twin and he's very vengeful.
Quinn: You mean you've just lurking around Lawndale since we fought Michael Myers and Jason.
Chris: No, on that day Evil Chris better known to you as Satan broke in my house and tied me up. You've been fighting him ever since.
Quinn: Then where have you been so long?
Chris: Training and sleeping. You go wake Daria and Jane up I'll destroy E.Chris.
Quinn walks over to Daria and Jane while Chris heads to Evil Chris's main chamber. Chris gets there and kicks down the door.
Chris: I'm back.
Evil Chris: You!
Chris: That's right asshole I'm back and I'm stronger.
Evil Chris: Show me how stronger you are.
Electricity starts surrounding Chris and muscles start to bulge and his eyes get red. Chris charges at his evil twin and plants his massive fist right into Evil Chris's face. E.C flies back into his throne.
E.Chris: So you want to play like that.
Evil Chris clenches his fists and horns grow out of his head, wings burst out his back, his muscles bulge as well, flames surround him, and his eyes become red. The two Chrises run into each other E.Chris flies up in the air. He starts shooting fireballs at Chris. Chris rolls out of the way. E.C swoops down and stabs Chris with his horns and brings him back in the air. Evil Chris pulls Chris off his horns and slaps him across the room with his wings. Quinn, Daria, and Jane walk in and see Chris injured on the floor (Quinn had explained the whole thing about Chris to them already). Quinn notices a guitar right next to Chris. She knows that playing "Paint It Black" revives him. She runs and grabs the guitar but Evil Chris grabs the guitar out of Quinn's hands and hits her with the guitar. Daria and Jane run in to help but E.C blows them back with his wings. Chris witnessing all this stands up.
Chris: I'm on the brink of insanity and you just me off. NOW YOU WILL PAY DEARLY!
Chris puts his massive hand right through Evil Chris's heart and picks him up. Chris walks to the river of lava and holds his evil twin above it.
Chris: You have lost brother give the control of the Earth back to God and leave Lawndale and the rest of this world alone.
Evil Chris: All right.
Chris throws Evil Chris back to his throne. Chris goes and picks up Quinn and throws her over his shoulder. He helps Daria and Jane up.
Chris: Brother, lick your wounds you fool. Daria and Jane lets get out of here I'm getting hungry.
Daria: We still got to get Mack, Kevin, and Upchuck.
Chris: 10 steps ahead of you I did that as soon as I got down here.
Cut To: A week later.
Yes Chris and Quinn started going out again. Things became normal in Lawndale again. The Fashion Club was as arrogant as usual. Daria, Jane, and Chris kept to themselves during school. But Chris, Quinn, Daria, and Jane always train for an hour everyday just incase some of that weird shit happens again.