Hangover Highway By Melissa & K-mart Shopper Criticism, Praise, or You feel just like saying something? E-mail us Dammit! sbecker@springnet1.com/ or The usual Daria sequence. La,La La, La Daria in Hangover Highway Scene 1: Lawndale High School; Mrs. Bennett is standing at the blackboard, drawing yet another confusing diagram of some economic disaster or another. Jane takes out a piece of scrap paper and scribbles something on it. She hands it to Daria and smirks a little. Daria takes it reluctantly and reads. Jane VO: Hey Daria, Mystik Spiral's got a gig tonight at their drummer's cousin's keg party. Wanna come? -Jane- Daria scribbles something on the bottom of the paper and hands it back, unbeknownst to Mrs. Bennett or any of the other students. Daria VO: Only on one circumstance. Nothing is to be said about your brother and I. I mean it Jane. I have a few places a body could be concealed nicely without any trace of its existence. Remember that. -Daria- Jane smiles and balls up the paper. The bell rings and all of the students file out of the classroom, ignoring the homework assignment Mrs. Bennet is shouting at them. Scene 2: Lane household; Daria is laying on Jane's bed with her nose in a book. Jane is sketching something on her artist desk. Sick Sad World is blaring from the TV. TV: Why is there always room for it? The Jell-O conspiracy, next on Sick Sad World! Jane: You psyched about the party tomorrow? Daria: No. Jane: Not even a little excited? Daria: No. Jane: (sighs) Fine. Be that way. Daria: What way? Jane: I dunno. You like? Jane holds up her picture of Trent and Jesse playing at a rock concert. Daria puts down her book and turns to look at the picture. Daria shrugs and goes back to her book. Daria: It's good. Jane: I think I know what would make it great. (scribbles some more on the paper) Hmm. How about now? Jane holds it out in view again. A rough sketch of Daria planting a kiss on Trent's cheek is now added. Daria once again stops reading to look at the drawing, only to regret it immediately. She turns back to her book. Daria: It sucks. Burn it. Jane: Maybe I'll make a copy and post it on my door- the front of it. Daria: Give it here, I'll burn it. Jane: Nope. This goes in my little folder of stuff to keep. Momentous of my early stages. Daria: Early stages? You already artistically dominate the entire school, including the teachers. Jane: There's always room for improvement. Daria: Especially in Quinn's case. She's got nothing but room in that bouncy hair covered skull of hers. Jane: You're forgetting about the cobwebs. Daria: Oh yeah. Scene 3: Song: Sabotage by the beastie boys is in the background Morgendorffer household; The entire family is sitting down to dinner. Quinn is talking on the cordless phone, Helen on the cellular, and Jake is reading the paper. Daria merely pikes at her lasagna and stares into space as usual. Quinn: Yes, that would definitely be cute, Sandi. Uh, hold on a minute. Call waiting. Hello? Oh hi Tiffany. Yeah. Sandi's on the other line. You want me to ask? Sandi? Yeah, it's Tiffany. Helen: Eric, tell them it's not about the money. I swear it isn't! Yes. Okay. I'll speak to you at the office Monday. All right, tomorrow. Yes. No, Eric, dammit I said it wasn't! Goodbye. (hangs up) Oh lord. You'd think after working with me this long he'd know a thing or two about me. But, nooooo. How was your day? Quinn: Tiffany? Sandi says yes, definitely. Hold on. Stacy? Sandi says yes. Uh huh. Hold on. Sandi? Stacy wants to know if crushed velvet goes well with tight jeans. Uh huh. I definitely agree with that. Okay, hold on. Tiffany? Hold on. Stacy? Helen: Daria? Daria: Well, Jane invited me to a party for her brother's friend's cousin's birthday tomorrow. No one else felt like plastering a fake smile on their face and attempting to converse with me like they usually do at least once a week. Other than that, great. Helen: (sighs) Daria. Wait a minute. A party? That's great! What time is it? Are there going to be any chaperones? How old is this cousin of whoever's by the way? How are you getting there? Daria: If I had known interrogation was at stake, I wouldn't have brought it up. Besides, I don't know anything but what I've already said. Helen: It's not an interrogation, Daria, it's a simple curiosity. Daria: Then why were all those questions centered around things that over protective, over bearing parents would ask their perfectly independent teenager? Helen: Uh...all right, sweety. You can go to the party with my complete trust in you. Just, don't do anything I wouldn't. Quinn: Okay Sandi! Then it's settled. Your house tomorrow. Sleepover party held by the fashion club. Bye. Tiffany? Fashion club sleepover party tomorrow at Sandi's. Mandatory for all members. Bye. Stacy? Sleepover at Sandi's. I'm going, how about you? Great! See you tomorrow. Uh huh. Bye. (hangs up) I'm going to go pack for tomorrow. Bye. Daria: Well, seems you and Dad have the house to yourselves. Would you like to reconsider that last statement? Mom? Helen: Er... Scene 4: Song: Karma Police by RadioHead Lane household exterior; Daria walks up the walkway and rings the doorbell. Jane soon answers it and happily drags her inside the house. Trent and Jesse are carrying amps out of the basement to the Tank. They pass them on their way to Jane's room. Trent: Hey Daria. Jesse: Hey. Daria: Hi. (sees Jane smirk) Shut up. Jane: I didn't say anything. Daria: I telepathically read your thoughts. Jane: Then what am I thinking now? Daria: Jane, you have a filthy mind. Jane: Damn you're good. Scene 5: Birthday party; Mystik Spiral is playing in a corner, the small crowd is cheering for them. Max's (the drummer) cousin, Katlyn, is standing in the front. Jane drags Daria to a secluded corner, where the noise isn't so loud. Jane: So how's it going so far? Daria: Well, the only thing they have to drink is flat coke and beer, I haven't spoken a word thus far to anyone besides you, but on the plus side, I'm continuing to be involuntarily alienated. Jane: Hey, a silver lining. Mystik Spiral's gonna be over with their little "gig" in about two minutes, so at least you can talk to Trent while I converse with a certain rhythm guitarist. Daria: Go get 'em, tiger. I'll just wait in the kitchen and stare at a wall for an hour or two. Jane: Suit yourself. Jane walks off as the music dies down. The band walks away from the equipment, but not before they all wish Katlyn a happy birthday. Trent: Happy Birthday Katlyn. Max: Ditto, Katie! Nick: Same here Kate. Jesse: Yeah. Katlyn: Thanks guys! Jane: Hey Jesse, come here. I wanna tell you something. Jesse: Kay. Jane drags Jesse up the staircase. Trent watches them go and looks around, eyeing the keg. He walks over and picks up a cup of beer. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Daria standing in the kitchen alone, staring at a wall blankly. He smiles and walks over to her. She sees him and blushes noticably. Trent: Hey Daria. What's up? Daria: Uh...nothing. Trent: And why is that? Daria: Huh? Trent: Why aren't you having fun like the rest of us? Daria: My alternative lifestyle prohibits me to have fun. Trent: Huh? Daria: I don't feel like it. Trent: Come on. Join the party. Trent takes another swig of beer as Jane rejoins them. Trent eyes her and raises a brow. Trent: Back so soon? Jane: We just talked. Damn the luck. Daria: Um, okay. Jane: (eyeing Trent's half empty cup) Hmm. Trent: You guys want some? No age limit here. Jane: Uh.. Trent: Come on. It's not so bad. Jane: All right. But Daria has to drink too. Split a cup? Daria: No thanks. Jane: Come on, what harm could a half a cup do? We're suppose to be having fun, it's a party. Daria: I said no. Trent: C'mon Daria. It'll loosen you up a bit. Jane: And god do you need to. Daria: Jane, it's illegal. Jane: Nobody will know except us. And god knows I won't tell. Trent: I can keep a secret. Daria: I don't want it on my conscience. Jane: You don't have a conscience. Daria: I don't feel like it. Trent: C'mon Daria. You know you want to try it. Daria: Uh, I do? Trent: Yep. And now's the perfect time. Jane: C'mon, let's go get some. (waits till they're out of hearing range) Trent gets really honest when he's drunk. Just wait and see. Jane leads a hesitant Daria to the keg. She picks up two half empty cups and hands one to her. Jane looks at it for a moment, then shrugs and takes a swig. Daria watches as Jane makes a face, then drinks the rest in one swallow. She looks down at her cup and then at Jane, who seems perfectly fine. In her head, every moral she has tells her to put the cup down and walk home perfectly sober. But she lifts the cup to her mouth and takes a drink anyway. Just as Jane did, she makes a weird face due to taste. Jane smiles and looks around as the room begins to spin. She puts her hand on her head and closes her eyes. Daria drops the cup on the carpet, knowing it's already stained in many places. Trent walks over and puts his empty cup on the table, taking another one. Trent: How do you feel? Daria: Not well. Trent: Just wait a minute or two. Give it a few to kick in. Daria: Kick in? Trent: Yeah, then you really start to loosen up. Jane: Listen to the man, Daria. He's been drunk more times than I can remember. Jesse: Hey Jane. Uh, did you have a drink? Jane: Yuh huh. Why? Jesse: Uh, why? Jane: Cause it's a party. And you know what's really fun at parties? Jesse: Uh, what? Jane: Come upstairs and I'll show you. Jane takes him by the arm and literally drags him up the staircase. Trent looks at Daria and smiles. She smiles back unusually not embarrassed. Daria takes off her jacket, suddenly getting a little warm. She drops it on the floor while attempting to lay it on the table. Trent sees her loosening up a lot and smiles. Trent: Feel better now? Daria: (seductively) Yeah. Trent: Shall we return to the party? Daria: (seductively) Uh huh. Trent smiles broadly and raises an eyebrow. Daria: You know Trent I like you a lot Trent : Daria I like you too. In Fact I love you. (Trent kisses Daria) Jane and Jesse return from their little “party”. Looking a bit unkempt. Jane: We had some further plans at our house? Cool? Daria :(looking up from kissing Trent) Sounds cool. Jane: Why don’t you drive Jesse? Jesse: cool.(gazing at Jane) Daria: We…want…. the.. backseat Scene 6- Cut to Jesse Driving the car, Jane in the passenger seat. Trent and Daria are…..well….you can guess They come to a stop light. Brittany and Kevin are driving back from their trip to lovers lane. They look into the other car. Brittany: Omigod! Is that Daria? She’s making out with some guy Kevin: Speaking of making out…. Scene 7- Song Hong Kong Garden by the Ants and Adams is playing in the background Its about 11:00 A.M. in the morning Daria is getting ready to leave Jane: You’re going to call Trent right? Daria: What did I do with him? Jane: You were drunker than I thought! Didn’t you think it was strange that you woke up in Trent’s room -*Naked*? Daria: (Deadpan as ever) No Not really. Jane: (Rolls eyes) What is it going to take? Locking you in a room for two months? Daria: Maybe. Oh dammit I’m giving you ideas Jane: (Smirking) That could work Scene 8- Daria is walking home. Trent taps Daria on the shoulder. Trent: Hey Daria Do you rememember last night?(blushing slightly) Daria: No. Trent: Oh. See ya soon? Daria: Ya later. Scene 9- Show Front of house. Quinn VO: Daria is that a hickie? Cut to makeovers and credits. Song: I hope you had the time of your life by Greenday THE END