EVER NEVER: A DARIA CROSSOVER by Hikhali (hikhali@hotmail.com) A carriage pulls up at the front door of a castle, and Nick and Max, dressed in early 1800's garb, step out and go incredulously to the door. They are led inside by a buttler, and look around in wonder. This place is big! And beautiful! They reach a doorway and go inside. Seated there is Her Majesty, the Queen of France. They bow and sit on nearby chairs. "I suppose you're wondering why anyone of my age would request and ordience with the author of children's folk songs," The lady began. The two men snicker, and Max jumps in with "We're criminale's!," To whick Nick slaps him upside the head and says "Your letter was most intruiging... Well, what I could read of it. My baby drools a lot, and he kinda... ate the corner of the envelope." She dismissed this with a wave of her hand. "I find most of your songs... quite... brilliant... actually, not. Anyway. I WAS disturbed, when I read your version of cinderboy." Nick rolled his eyes and said "You'll have take that up with Max. It was his idea to do children's songs." Max yellped and said "Hey! We're-" But was cut of by the buttler saying "Criminales. We know." The lady goes on to point out a painting and then takes a box. She gestures to the painting and says "His name was Trent Du'Barbarack, and THIS was his glass guitar. Well, he didn't really ever use it. It was something... We'll, you'll see. What's the phrase? Oh yes. Once upon a time, there was a young boy, who appriciated his parents very much. Mainly for their relaxed attitude..." The small manor was bustling with life. A baroness! Upstairs, Trent was being dressed by Paul and Louie. He was happy that Papa was coming back, but showed little emotion. A rock hit the window and Trent looked out. Sitting there was Jane, the peasant next door. "I told you, Jane, not today! Papa's coming home." "You look almost happy." She sneered, mockingly. Trent growled, and lept outside, trying to kick Jane. She said "Can't touch this." and ran off, but she wasn't quick enough. She was pelted by mud, and fell down. Trent went to the side of the house where a carriage was pulled up. He stared ahead as a little boy and two girls emerged, followed by their mother, the Baroness Amanda DeGhent. That night, Trent comented on how relaxed she was, as his father pulled a box into he room. Inside was a glass guitar and a regular guitar, which he strumed. He smiled vacuously at his father and new mother, and went to sleep. The next day, his parents left the house, rarely retuning. It would be ten years before a new person would talk to him. He really SHOULD do something about that spontaneous sleeping thing. King Dante was enraged. How DARE his own daughter, Daria, even THINK to deny the Prince of Spain her hand in marriage? And flipping the entire royal court off? He needed to get control over this girl. Queen Danie followed along, arguing that she was just a child, and needed love. They got to her room, but she was gone. She had left, and was now at Trent's manor. Trent's new stepbrother and sisters were Wind, the eldest, Penny, the wisest, and Summer, the prettiest. Wind had his eye on the Princess as well, and would do anything to win her heart. He was enraged, too, to see his step brother conversing with her that morning. She was completely smitten, and rather sangfroid, for all that she was blushing. He growled and told his sisters. Penny, who had embraced the love that dare not speak it's name, looked at her and licked her lips, saying "Yummy." Summer said "They make a nice couple." Daria had ridden into a yard that morning on her horse. She absolutely HATED her father, King Dante. She was annoyed with her mother as well, due to particuarly anti-love attitude. Daria was no big-hearted sap, but she knew how to love. She was riding along, when she saw a gorgeous-looking babe of a man, snoozing in an orchard, and about to drop his guitar. She leaned over and gently woke him up. Trent awoke to this gorgeous girl that had to be princess Daria leaning over him. He was startled by the beauty that she hid. He had long ago learned to recognize it. "Hey. You must be Princess Daria." He said. "No, I'm the Pope." She replied. He cracked up, recognizing her defense mechanism innidiately. The two hit it off right away, and that's when Wind saw them. He began to cry "I'll never learn to love!" Penny went outside to see if Daria was like her, and Daria looked at her once, and before she could say anything, Daria said "I'm sorry. I don't swing THAT way." Trent and Penny's eyes went wide, and he laughed again. "Boy, you sure figured her out quickly!" Penny growled and went back inside. Summer tried in vane to console her siblings, then said "Forget it. I need to go find MY kids before consoling YOU kids!" "I suppose the director wants us to make false pretenses, but I don't." Daria said this, then reached down and frenched the prince. He was shocked and happy. The two rode off to the palace, and told King Dante how they felt. He was even more pissed, but couldn't deny Daria the wish of her heart. The princess and peasant were married at once, with not a little prodding from "yenta Jane," as they called her. The next time Trent's parents were home (which was a few years later), he told them. By then, Penny had run off, Summer was chasing her kids all over the province, and Wind was still pissing about his inability to love. No one really paid attention, so it didn't matter. Daria and Trent lived happily ever never. Back at the present day, the queen finished up her story. Nick asked "Ever never?" To which the queen replied "To live is to enjoy yourself and be TRULY happy. Who could be happy with no plumbing and a terrible cook?" Nick nodded his head, and he and Max left, Max pondering that the negative, which is the nothingness of being, and the nihilating power, both together, is nothingness. Who knows why. Who cares?