THE DUST BUNNY PROJECT:

A Musical Review!

 

 

 

 

©2006 The Angst Guy (theangstguy@yahoo.com)

Daria and associated characters are ©2006 MTV Networks

 

 

Feedback (good, bad, indifferent, just want to bother me, whatever) is appreciated. Please write to: theangstguy@yahoo.com

 

Synopsis: Daria’s worst nightmare: the dust bunny project has come to life!

 

Author's Notes: In December 2006, The Ranting Klown challenged me to “write a small fic that is told from the point of view of an object in Daria’s room,” adding, “it must be so whimsical that I suffocate on it.” This was the result, based on Daria’s description of her room in The Daria Diaries.

 

Acknowledgements: Bless you, Ranting Klown!

 

 

 

 

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Introduction

 

 

We focus on Daria Morgendorffer, asleep in her bed about 4 o’clock in the morning, gasping and twitching from some dreadful nightmare. We slowly close in and peer inside her terrifying dream . . . and see a chorus line of tiny dust bunnies dancing arm-in-arm and singing the following lyrics in squeaky voices under her bed. The dust bunnies sing:

 

 

 

‘Neath the bed where Mistress sleeps,

Down where daylight never peeps,

‘Yond the crusts of pizza stale,

Past the cotton undies pale,

O’er forgotten CD cases,

‘Round the broken black bootlaces,

Back of hated puppy slippers

And the missing toenail clippers—

 

[chorus]

Here we are! Here we be!

Dusty Bunnies gay are we!

All night we sing and dance and play,

Then play and dance and sing all day!

Join our party in the crumbs

Where vacuum cleaner never comes!

 

 

Though dark and gloomy Mistress is,

Her bunnies never give a whiz.

All that angst and grief and sorrow,

That can wait until tomorrow—

Tie your dancing shoes on tight

And party till you can’t see right!

Raise the dust up off the floor!

Not enough? We’ll make some more!

 

Here we are! Here we be!

Dusty Bunnies gay are we!

All winter long we sing and dance,

All summer, same, but lose the pants!

Join our party in the fluff

Of Daria’s forgotten stuff!

 

 

Thankful we for Mistress glum,

A snarky teenage slacker bum,

A stranger to both mop and broom

So every corner of her room

Is host to billions of our kind—

But nowhere will you ever find

A dust’er place for buns to play

Than where our Mistress snores away!

 

Here we are! Here we be!

Dusty Bunnies gay are we!

We dance and play and sing and cheer

And drink up gallons of our beer!

Join our party in the dark

Within Dust Bunny Project Park!

 

 

 

 

Original: 12/17/06, 12/25/06

 

FINIS